"Christian!"

He turned to face me, his face as pleasant as ever. I examined him closely for a minute, looking for signs that he'd suffered some sort of difficulty, but his eyes were warm, and the ever-present smile lurked just behind his lips. "Are you all right? I've been worried sick about you! Where have you been?"

Both his eyebrows went up in mock surprise. "Such passion. I have been here, readying the estate for the festival."

"You know full well what I'm talking about!" I smacked him on the shoulder, then grabbed his hand and pulled him over to an unoccupied corner. "Where were you last night? I was worried about you after… after Tanya's body was discovered. You heard about that, didn't you?"

He reversed my grip so he was holding my hand, raising it to his lips, his eyes holding mine as he kissed the back of my fingers. Say what you will about women's lib, I had to admit there was something about having my hand kissed that made me go all girly inside.

"You look lovely tonight, my Beloved. However, I must presume to inform you that I do not care for you to be sharing your charms with every man present." He reached to the front of my ruffled blouse. I looked down. The top button, a small faux pearl, was missing, leaving my blouse gaping open, exposing my breasts down to the edge of my very low-cut bra.

I grabbed at the material and clutched it closed. "Damn. Must have happened when I crashed into Henri."

He smiled and flashed his hand. In it was a very old-looking gold brooch of a griffin clutching a large red stone in its beak. "Allow me," he said, brushing aside my hands, pinning the brooch so it closed my blouse.

"It's lovely, Christian, thank you. I'll take very good care of it."

"Consider it a gift from one who admires you."

I didn't want to accept it since it looked valuable, but I figured I'd return it after the festival when I could explain my feelings without insulting him.

"Thank you, but that still doesn't explain why you didn't answer me last night." I peered into his unfathomable eyes.

"My housekeeper said you called," he answered, not batting an eyelash at his obvious evasion. "Alas, I was not at home at that time."

I squinted my eyes at him. "Christian Johann Dante, you know full well what I meant, so don't try to pull that Mr. Innocent crap on me." I put my hand on his wrist and gave it a little squeeze. "I know you heard me; I could feel you out there. Why didn't you answer me?"

He didn't move a muscle, but I felt him withdraw. "I was under the impression you found such form of communication distasteful. Further, I believed from the activities that followed that you preferred your privacy to my company."

I stared at him, my mouth hanging open for a second before I realized what I was doing. "You rotter!"

I bellowed the words so loud, all his staff turned to look.

"You did it on purpose! You wanted me to be worried about you! You wanted me to think you were lying sick or injured somewhere. You great big… POOP!"

A smile flirted with the corners of his mouth. It just made me see red.

"Gah!" I yelled at him in frustration, then stomped off, swearing to myself about men who played mind games. I thanked God Raphael didn't do that. He might be secretive now and then, but at least he told me that he wasn't telling me everything.

"Joy," Christian called after me. I kept walking. He took my arm and walked with me. I refused to look at him. "I will not apologize for my actions, since I cannot regret anything that makes you look upon me with a favored eye, but I do lament the fact that I caused you worry."

"I can't believe you used me like that," I said, a tiny bit mollified. I didn't know if it was the magic his voice worked, or the sincerity in his eyes, but I did at least stop thinking about torturing him. "I can't believe you deliberately let me worry all night and all day about you." Something he said suddenly penetrated the layers of irritation. I stopped and turned to face him. "Hey! What do you mean,'the activities that followed'? How do you know what activities followed? Were you spying on Raphael and me?"

He rubbed the top of my hand with his thumb. I pulled my hand away. I liked it better when Raphael did it. "No, I was not spying on you. I hold you in more esteem than to do that. But you are my Beloved; our minds are as one. I can feel when you are subject to strong emotions, just as you can feel when I am."

A massive wave of blush washed up my chest and neck, firing my cheeks to egg-frying temperature. "You mean you can tell when I'm… when Raphael and I are… you know?"

Distaste flickered across his face, something a whole lot more ominous darkening his eyes. "You may rest assured that I do not savor the knowledge that my Beloved is in the arms of another, but the answer is, yes, I know. Just as you would know should I betray you."

The pain in his eyes was too much for me. I took both his hands in mine, pressing them to my bosom.

Just as I was about to speak, a throat cleared. I turned my head and glared at Henri. "Go stand over by the statue of the horse. You can watch me from there."

He looked a bit mulish about my order until Christian turned his gaze on him. Henri blinked a few times, then backed away, bumping into several people, a large potted tree, and finally colliding with a small iron table that held the cash box for the beer garden. He didn't stop by the statue, however, he kept going. I figured I had only a couple of minutes before he found Raphael and tattled.

I squeezed Christian's hands until he looked back at me. "Christian, I'm so sorry you think I'm betraying you. I truly am, but we've gone over this and over this. I don't have the same feelings for you that you have for me. I just can't be what you want me to be, pure and simple." His fingers tightened around mine. "I know that's cruel of me, and selfish and self-serving, but it's the truth. I love Raphael. I will always love Raphael, and nothing and no one will change that. If you truly can share my emotions, you must know that I'm not deluding myself."

"I know that he has bewitched you, yes. You are fascinated with him, and he arouses you sexually as I do not, but it is apparent from the fact that you have not taken the final step of Joining that deep inside you know the truth."

My blush, which had started to die, was reborn with a vengeance at his mention of the attraction Raphael held for me.

"I feel your emotions, Beloved, feel the depth of your passion and know that the source of them cannot be anyone but myself. You are my Beloved. Because I know this, because I know that ultimately you will be mine, I am allowing you time to rid yourself of the affection you feel for St. John." His eyes were as cold and hard as the hematite rune stones. "It has not been easy for me, but my belief that you will see the truth is the only reason I have allowed another to possess you."

In hindsight, I guess I'd been around too many men that day telling me what I could and couldn't do. There is really no other explanation for what happened next.

"You know, this macho 'I will allow you' stuff is really starting to irritate me. I'm not a possession, Christian. I have a mind. I can make decisions on my own. And I've made it! Now, I like you. I'd like to count you as my friend. I've promised to help you find your Beloved"—I held up my hand to stop the objection I could see he was about to offer—"OK, your other Beloved. I know you don't think it's possible, but what's to stop there from being two women for you, huh? Me with my wires crossed, madly in love with Raphael instead of you, and some other poor woman out there who is your soul mate and doesn't know it. Regardless, as I was saying, I'd like to be your friend, but I swear to God, if you tell me ONE MORE TIME what your high-and-mighty self is allowing me to do, I'll belt you one right on the nose."