“Would that it were. Because whatever it is out there is coming closer. If they are looking for us, then I am forced to believe that all of this activity and attention is far too murderous for a simple traffic bust.”

“Unhappily, I agree. They have made no attempt to communicate with us just came in blasting.”

I looked on gloomily as she opened the survival kit and took out an immense handgun. “But let us not make it easy for them.”

We didn’t. The armored police cruiser had its tracks blow off as it appeared. It kept firing at us even though it couldn’t move. We dived in close, so close it could not depress its guns to get at us. I jumped to the top of the tread, flipped open the top hatch and dropped a couple of sleep capsules. Then I looked carefully inside.

“Highly interesting.” I rejoined Angelina on the ground. “Nobody home. Which means, like the cruisers that chased us, this thing is also robot operated and remotely controlled.”

“By whom?”

“By our new enemies, whoever they are.”

Distant engines sounded from behind the trees and we slipped away in the opposite direction, deeper into the forest. Which did not do much good in the end because there were. now sounds of machines from ahead.

“They have trackers on us-so there is no point in wearying ourselves by running about. We’ll stay here and make a stand. Get as many of these robot machines as we can.”

“I thought that there were laws of robotics-about not killing or injuring humans.”

“It looks like those laws were repealed. Lock and load here they come again!”

I would have felt a certain compunction about killing a policeman, but I really did enjoy blasting police robots into tiny bits of junk. But it proved to be a no-win battle. Wherever we turned they were there ahead of us. Our ammunition dwindled as their numbers increased.

“My last grenade,” Angelina said as she blasted a hovertank.

“My last shot,” I said, taking out a robocycle. “It has been nice knowing you.”

“Nonsense, Jim. You are not giving up, you never do, never will.”

“You know that-but they don’t.” I stepped out into the clearing and waved my handkerchief, raised my palms in the air as I faced the circle of robot police. “Peace, pax, surrender. OK?”

“No OK,” an armored robot said. It had sergeant’s stripes welded to its arm, and a sneering tone to its metallic voice.

It raised a glowing muzzled flamethrower.

I blew it away with a shot from my crotch cannon.

Was this the end? Were we to be ground into the soil of this sordid planet at the galaxy’s edge?

The tanks and robots and all the other military gear surrounded us, rumbled forward, weapons quivering with metallic malice. Angelina had her hand in mine. I contemplated one last attack, throwing myself onto our attackers in the vain hope that she might escape. Then, even as I tensed my muscles for a suicidal attack, a voice sounded out from among the trees.

“You really are very good,” the dapper man said condescendingly as he stepped into the glade. Full evening dress, black cloak held by a diamond brooch, diamondcapped cane. This was too much. I heard a primitive, unsummoned growl grumble from the back of my throat as I fired what really was the very last shot from my crotch cannon.

It exploded with a glare of flame, a blast of noise.

Just in front of him. Spending all of its energy harmlessly against the force screen emanating from his walking stick.

“Temper, temper,” he breathed, covering a yawn with the back of his hand. He waved the ebony cane in a slight arc and all of the weaponry grumbled back into the forest and vanished from sight.

“You are not the police,” Angelina said.

“Anything but, Mrs. diGriz. Those were my minions who took you on. My employees, so to speak. Their ranks are now well decimated I must add.”

“Tough,” I said. “Call your insurance company. Remember—you started it.”

“I did indeed, and am well satisfied by the outcome. I have heard from many sources that you were the best man-and best lady of course-in your chosen profession. I found that hard to believe. But now I do. Most impressive. So impressive that I am prepared to offer you a little assignment.”

“I am not for hire. Who are you?”

“Oh, I think you are. Imperetrix Von Kaiser-Czarski. You may call me Chaise.”

“Good-by, Chaise,” I sneered, taking Angelina’s hand and turning away.

“One million credits a day. Plus expenses.”

“Two million,” I said, turning back, all sneering spent.

“Done. We will both sign this.” A gold-embellished contract on finest vellum unrolled from his walking stick and he passed it over to me. Angelina leaned over my shoulder and we read it together.

“Any problems?” Chaise asked.

“None,” I answered. “We undertake to undertake an assignment at the agreed fee, payment to be deposited daily to my account. Fine. But what is it that you want us to do?”

Chaise sighed and touched his stick again. It opened up into a comfortable-looking folding seat and he settled into it.

“To begin with, you must realize my position, understand exactly who I am. You have never heard of me because I prefer it that way. If only to avoid the people with their hands out, eagerly seeking some of my money. I am, to put it simply, the richest man in the galaxy.” He smiled slightly as he spoke. Undoubtedly thinking of all the money he had.

“I am probably the oldest man as well. The last time I worked out the figures, I think it was forty thousand years, give or take a millennium or two. As I am sure you realize, one’s memory begins to glitch a bit as the centuries roll by. I was a scientist, rather I think that I was a scientist. Or perhaps I hired a scientist. In any case I developed the first longevity drug. That much I am sure of. Which I, of course, kept to myself. And have been improving it ever since. How old do you think I look?”

He raised his chin and turned his head. No wattles there. No wrinkles about his eyes, no touch of gray to his temple.

“Forty, I would say,” Angelina said.

“Centuries?”

“Years.”

“You are very kind. Well, as the millennia rolled by I amassed more money, more property. I could have easily assured my fortune by simply investing and letting the compound interest roll in. But that would have been very boring, and boredom is what I loathe the most. I have always sought excitement to lessen the burden of my years. In the process of growing rich I have bought, and now own, entire star systems. To add diversity to my portfolio I am presently in the process of acquiring a spiral galaxy; one never knows when one might need one. There are some black holes among my recent acquisitions. But I think I shall divest myself of them. Boring. Seen one black hole and you have seen them all.”

He took the kerchief from his breast pocket, touched it lightly to his lips, returned it. One atom short of a molecule, I thought. I caught Angelina’s eye and saw that she thought the same.

“But now I have a very troublesome problem that needs to be solved. I look for your aid in that quest.”

“Three million a day,” I said promptly, avarice beating down suspicion.

“Done,” he said, stifling a yawn at the same time. “My problem is that I am systematically being robbed. Someone or some group-has been getting into my bank accounts. Right across the galaxy. Clearing them out. And if it so happens that I happen to own the bank—The Widows and Orphans Is’ Interstellar Bank—why then the entire branch of the bank is cleaned out as well. This makes for bad customer relationships. From millions of clients with their billions of credits. As you might understand this is quite embarrassing for one in my position. You, gentleman Jim diGriz, must utilize all of your stainless steel talents to stop these thefts and to discover who is perpetrating them.


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