Well Mr Dyer, says the Serpent Hayes once more, it is all within your Hands to make or to mar. And with this he left my Chamber, smiling upon Walter.
The Smile enraged me and I could no more restrain my self: It is the work of Providence, I said to Walter, that most Men are not able to foretel their own Fate, for there was one in this Room who must surely die.
We all must Die, murmur'A Walter looking strangely upon me.
Yes, I replied, but it is hard to say who is Sick and who is Well.
I left the Office at Six and when the Rogue Hayes parted from me in the Passage I returned his Bow but coldly. It was a misty Evening, but it was not so obscure that the little Hawks-eyed creature could not follow me: so I walked with all speed up Whitehall and turned into the Strand, and for all this space I could hear the sound of Heels following me. I looked back once but the Villain hid himself from me: well, well, says I to my self, I will lead you a Dance for one day you must learn how to lead Apes in Hell. I quicken'd my Pace towards the Seven Dials and did not trouble to turn my Head, for I knew that he would not wish to lose me; but yet when I came to St Giles I crossed over with all Speed and the Run of the Coaches must have kept him on the other Side.
Then I hasten'd thro' Grape Court and turned into the Red Gates at the half-paved Entry there. Here I let the Mist leave me as I Stood by the Door: I walk'd in bravely enough but, when I saw the Letter by the Counter, I was close to sinking down upon the Floor. It was address'd, To Mr Dyer to be left for him at the Red Gates by Grape Court: With Care. But who could prophesy where I was to be, and who could calculate upon my Arrival on this Day? I open'd the Letter with trembling Hands and read what could not be indur'd: This his to lett you know that you shul be spoken about, so betid you flee the Office by Monda next or you may expect the worse as suer as ever you was born.
This filled me with horrible Apprehensions and I stagger'd to a Corner where I might groan over them; the Tap-boy ask'd me what I wished but I made no Answer until he came by me and touched me on the Arm, at which I shivered terribly. Do you call Sir, said he laughing, and I demanded a Pint of strong Ale. And as I drank these were my Reflections: I knew this Hayes, this Dog, by the Excrement he sent to me. I could smell him out, for he left his Ordure every where. And it was not so strange, neither, that he had placed his Letter here for had he not hounded me hither? Then I rejoyced, for tho' he might conceeve himself to be the Pursuer in truth it was I who follow'd him; we were fix'd in the same Center and, tho' moving contrary Ways at first, we were sure to encounter somewhere or other upon the Circumference. Thus he could no more escape me than a convicted Thief escapes the Gallows. If the Wind be in the right Corner, he will have Flam for Flam. And then I considered this: the Villain gives me Hints and Whispers but how much has he truly learned of my Work?
Has he knowledge of Mirabilis or of the man Joseph? There was no Question but that he could not know of the Sacrifices, for the Blood was spill'd in Darknesse and Secresy, but it was a Topick unsettled with me if he had ever followed me to Black Step Lane before it was ransacked by the idle Mobb.
The Noise and the Vapours of the Ale-house now began to affect me, and my Thoughts were soon so confus'd and all in a Heap that under the Weight of them my poor Mind sank back. For I thought I heard a Door closing, and the sound of Steps crossing the Threshold; and there seemed to come the Voice of a Woman calling, Is it you againe? Like an eccho came the Reply, Is he not yet back? There was then such a Roaring in my Ears that I woke as if from a Trance and looked about me in Astonishment. But I check'd my self: and so, said I, do you waste your Time by becoming a Mirror for outward Things?
Your Work is too pressing for you to sit by an Ale-house stove, so be gone and contemplate Mr Hayes his Fate in your Chamber. The Tavern was quiet now, and the Customers sat nodding against each other like the stinking Snuff of a Candle when it is just going out in an over-heated Socket. Who is that worshipful Lump of Clay, that Thing which lolls by the Stove in an Elbow-chair? That Thing is me, and as I rise I reel but keep my Step. Thus I wandred across St Giles and then beyond, but I was not so Drunken that I did not keep my Wits from being scattered: when I reach'd my Lodgings I took a Sweat and went to Bed, very hot and my Pulse high. I did not sleep so well after, but had some confus'd Doses.
I woke next Day with a light Head that allow'd strange Fancies in: I would as like have staid all day in my Gown and be denied to everybody, but then a fresh Idea gave me the Resolution to get up with a good heart. I dress'd my self and took my best Periwigg from its little Box before Nat came in to rouse me: Well sir, I said to him when he enter'd (and he made an aukward Stop when he heard me address him thus), I have just had a Thought I will not exchange for fifty Guineas.
He was urgent with me to discover it but I would not, and soon enough his wandering Mind was set upon another Course. Mrs Best, says he, sent message last Night if you would play a little Quadrille but you had not returned and I could not answer for you, I waited and waited till I grew quite Tired and then it was about the Middle of the Night when I heard a Noise Peace, Nat, I replied, you will disturb me this Morning with your Chatter for I have another Fish to Fry. And then I hugg'd my self closely.
It was with great Exultation that I walk'd into the Office and, having greeted Walter who was staring out of the Window as pale as if he had seen his own Spectre, I entered the Closet of Mr Hayes. I saw him thinking, O God here he comes! here he comes! but I approach'd him with all the Civility imaginable and ask'd him if he might grant me a Favour. He gave me a Bow and entreated me to proceed, saying that he would give me as much Favour as he could. Then I discours'd with him thus: that the Mason, before his own Fatality and in Grief at his Son's death, had not paid much heed to the Outwalls of St Mary Woolnoth facing Lombard Street, and that these Walls were in consequence wanting not less than seven or eight Foot in Height. When they were completed, then the Scaffolding might after that be intirely struck and taken away: no more Delay and, I added, since you have worked in strict Partnership with the Mason I would be very much obliged if you would inspect his Work and see what is necessary to finish it. The Villain told me that if it lay in his Power he would give me Satisfaction in this regard, for he too had been sensible of the Delay; then I thank'd him again, and he thank'd me for coming so modestly to him. And thus I drew him by Smiles into Perdition. Are you still affected by the Vertigo? J asked. I have a little Trouble, he replied to my great Delight.
He was as good as a dead Man, a Jack-pudding to be eaten, and as I returned to my own Closet I made my Guts to shake with Laughter like a trodden Quagmire. Walter was perplex'd by my sudden Mirth and asked me, how it was? And I replied, it was very well.
Here is something to encrease your Laughter, says he presently, there is a letter here from the Vicar of Mary Woolnoth.
From Priddon?
The same. He trusts that you will inform him when you have fixed a time for removing the Heathen Rubbidge -or so he puts it in his canonical Speech.
The Man is a Fool, I said, to talk of Rubbidge; I would sooner put him in the Cart when I hear the Clapper of the Rubbidge-men.
For in truth the Parson Priddon is a peece of hypocritical Holinesse who wears an old-fashioned Coat and has his Stockings hanging about his Legs; and yet his Face is red and plump, and his Eyes sparkling. He speaks of God from his Pulpit but knows no more of It than the May-fly knows of the Water above which it buzzes or the Mobb know of the Sunne when they feel its Heat upon their sweaty Faces. No Churchman has so well observ'd the Act of Uniformity, for in King Charles the Second's time who was more eager than him for putting the Penal Laws in execution; in King James's who a greater Stickler for abolishing them; in King William's who more violent for sending home the Dutch Blew-Guards in the English service; and now in Queen Anne's who more complaisant to our Dutch allies? Walter has left my Closet to make Water but on coming in again he says: And will you remove that Poor stuff, as Priddon calls it?