The garden was empty.

It didn't feel right.

"Beetle!" I called. He turned his slow face to me, smiling. "There's something wrong," I said to him. Beetle just smiled.

"Everything's dandy, Scribb," he answered, with a soft voice. He clutched Mandy closer to him, revelling in her feel. It didn't feel right, somehow.

A movement in the grass, down at my feet. Maybe it was the yellow bird, searching for food. I looked down. A violet and green slithering there, amongst the grasses and the stalks.

Dreamsnake!

Even in the garden of bliss, those slimy creatures find a way through.

Stepping back...

"Beetle!"

Too late.

The snake rising up from the grass, filling the garden with his whiplash body. Snake-eyes staring at me.

Oh shit! How did that get in here?

"Beetle!" I shouted. There's a Viper in here! Feather's not real. It's a pirate!"

Beetle was too far gone to care. And the snake was laughing at me.

THERE'S SOME VIPER IN YOUR SYSTEM, LITTLE ONE.

"What's happening?" I asked.

Viper was Viral Implant; germs in the Vurt system; ways to make you suffer.

YOU'RE INSIDE A THEATRE. IT'S CALLED ENGLISH VOODOO. IT'S A PIRATE KNOWLEDGE VURT. TOTALLY ILLEGAL. NONE OF THIS IS REAL

"What?"

"It's worse than real. You're under arrest, kid. That real enough for you?"

I pulled away from that vicious face, looking for the Beetle and Mandy, and Twinkle and Karli. All I saw were four wavering shapes, as they jerked out together, and then I was following them, jerking back, and the garden fading to a patch of weed blackness...

The shecop Murdoch was smiling down at me. Her dumbfuck partner was standing two feet off, near the bathroom door, obscuring my Madonna poster. A shadowcop was writhing around the room-space, straight out of the garden, a violet and green undulation. The partner was broadcasting the shadow from a portable unit and the snake was beaming onto us. Never seen one like this before. It was the snake from the garden; he had followed us through into the real world. Snake must have some Vurt in him -- robo, shadow, Vurt -- all mixed up in a five-foot length of thick smoke, eyes of orange flashing inpho all over us, and a voice of yellow slitherings:

WE HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THAT THIS IS AN ILLEGAL GAMEPLAY.

"No. I... it's... it's just..."

I was back in my favorite armchair, struggling with the words. I just couldn't find the right ones.

PLEASE EXPLAIN THE VEHICLE IN THE FORECOURT.

I couldn't explain. Couldn't move. Couldn't raise a finger in battle.

PLEASE EXPLAIN THE VIOLATION.

"I... I can't."

My lips were the only moving parts, and then only just I was mumbling excuses, weak excuses.

Mandy and the Beetle were lying on the settee together, all wrapped up from the garden still. I could see their bodies were still jerking from the dream, but they weren't showing their faces. The young girl, Twinkle, was standing by the fire, her eyes full of life. She had Murdoch in her sights. Don't try it, kid. She'll just beat you to a pulp. Karli the robodog was by Twinkle's side, the plastic bones shaking under her fur. SAID VEHICLE IS NOT REGISTERED IN YOUR NAME.

Twinkle started to move forwards, towards the shecop.

ALSO SUSPECTED PURCHASE AND USE OF VARIOUS OTHER ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES, AS FOLLOWS...

"That's enough, Shaka," said Murdoch.

These things had names!? These smoky wraiths? I never knew that.

THEY ARE ENTITLED TO THEIR RIGHTS, AS STATED UNDER DECREE FIVE.

"Of course they are," replied Murdoch. "It's just that I'm taking over."

Twinkle was two feet away from Murdoch. Beetle and Mandy were still in a close embrace, still shivering but coming down, slowly, ever so slowly.

ALSO SUSPECTED HARBOURING OF A VURT ALIEN. A LIVE DRUG. DECREE FIFTEEN QUITE PLAINLY STATES -

"Okay!" shouted Murdoch. "This is my score. I'm bringing you down for this. Harbouring, possession, bootlegging. The whole shit. You're getting it." She pulled a flame gun from her waist band.

The chair was clutching at me, and I could still feel the garden's touch on my fingers.

"Game over. Partner, cuff them."

The fleshcop started to move, wallowing side to side under his fat middle. Mandy had awoken now, and was rolling over towards the action. Her eyes were fear-shot. The Beetle wasn't moving. Not yet. He was all folded up on the settee, shaking from the jerkout and Vurtlag.

"Out of the way, girl," said Murdoch, not even looking at Mandy as she said it. Mandy got up off the settee, cool and deadly. Murdoch had the gun pointed straight at the Beetle's head. "Okay, boss man, this is your alarm call."

Beetle didn't move.

Me neither. Felt like time was slowing down, and I was just a caught fly in its embrace, wings in honey.

THIS IS NOT THE STANDARD PROCEDURE said the shadowcop.

"You want to file a complaint, Shaka?"

NO, MA'AM. I DO NOT.

Karli and Twinkle made a move towards Murdoch. The dog's paws were scratching at the carpet.

"Call them off, little boy. You know it's the end."

I tried to, but my lips were parched and stuck, and my tongue was dead.

Twinkle and the dog were inches away from the cop.

"Call the fuckers off." Murdoch screamed, the gun locked between her fingers, aimed with a raging full-on, dead set on the back of Beetle's head.

This is where he is, the hero, when you need him the most. Fast asleep on an old worm-hive settee, bought for a fiver down a Junk-U-Don't-Want.

"I got one cuffed, Murdoch." It was the partner speaking, his words flabby with heavy breaths. My eyes made a quick glance. There was Mandy, all cuffed up to one of the fatso cop's wrists. He was looking pretty pleased with himself. Most probably he'd never met a girl like Mandy before.

Guy was gonna find out.

The shadowcop was firing inphos all over the room, looking for clues. I'M GETTING SOMETHING, he said.

"What is it?" asked Murdoch.

INSUFFICIENT INPHO AS OF YET. "Thanks for the inpho, Shaka, but I think you're getting on my nerves, just a little bit."

UNDERSTOOD. Shaka's eyes were flaring with bright orange, like he was working up to a flame beam.

"Let's keep this under control, people." Murdoch was putting on a good show, but I could see the sweat on her face. "That includes you, Shaka! Keep those beams cool. No one gets hurt." And the shadowsnake's eyes went from hot to cold. You could see the disappointment all the way through his swirling body.

Twinkle and the dog were close to the moment now, except they didn't know what to do, how to handle it. Twinkle was reaching out with one hand, almost as if she was going to say, "Please don't hurt my friends, Mrs Shecop," and I wouldn't put it past her. The dog was making a low growl.

"Back off, Twinkle," I said. My tongue felt like a slug nested in my throat. And she did, the youngster, this being my sad little power over her. Her hand dropped slowly to her dirty dress, where it fiddled and twirled in the folds.

"Back off, Karli." My voice again. And the dog obeyed, so maybe there was more to Suze than I thought. She'd given me the power over the dog, passed it on, all in secret. Karli moved back slightly but her eyes were still clenched and full of damage.

"Okay. Everybody's happy," breathed Murdoch, the gun still on a straight run to Beetle's brain. "Cuff the other one," she added, nodding her head towards me. The partner came towards my chair, dragging Mandy behind. In his free hand he held a new set of cuffs.

"I'm running out of hands, Murdoch," he said.

"Just fucking do it!" was her reply. "To the chair!" So the fat cop made a move towards me, fumbling with the key and the cuffs. This guy was a loser, I know that now, but he still had a few seconds of dominance left in him. He waved the cuffs in front of my slow eyes.