“We have to go. CiCi has to take her nap.”

The baby was in her bouncing chair on the table, one hand grasping the blue-and-white ball on the wire.

“She’s fine. She can sleep right there. Just listen to me for a minute.”

He waited and she put a conceding look on her face.

“All right. Say what you have to say and then I have to leave.”

McCaleb turned and leaned close to Graciela so that his words would be heard only by her. He noticed the edge of one of her ears poking through her hair.

“We are heading toward a big problem here, aren’t we?”

Graciela nodded and immediately the tears came down her cheeks. It was as if his saying the words out loud had knocked down the thin defensive mechanism she had constructed inside to protect herself and her marriage. McCaleb pulled the unused napkin out from beneath his silverware setting and handed it to her. He then put his hand on the back of her neck and pulled her toward him and kissed her on the cheek. Over the top of her head he saw Raymond watching them with a scared look on his face.

“We’ve talked about this, Graci,” he began. “You have it in your head that we can’t have our home and our family and everything else if this is what I do. The problem is in that word ‘if.’ That is the mistake here. Because there is no ‘if’ here. It’s not ‘if this is what I do.’ It is what I do. And I’ve gone too long thinking otherwise, trying to convince myself of something else.”

More tears came and she held the napkin to her face. She cried silently but McCaleb was sure people in the restaurant had noticed and were watching them instead of the television above them. He checked on Raymond and saw the boy was back to playing the video game.

“I know,” Graciela managed to say.

He was surprised by her acknowledgment. He took it as a good sign.

“So then what do we do? I’m not talking about just now and this case. I mean, for now and forever. What do we do? Graci, I am tired of trying to be what I’m not and of ignoring the thing inside that I know is what I am truly all about. It took this case to finally make me realize it and admit it to myself.”

She didn’t say anything. He wasn’t expecting her to.

“You know I love you and the kids. That’s not the issue. I think I can have both and you think I can’t. You’ve adopted this one-or-the-other attitude and I don’t think it’s right. Or fair.”

He knew his words were hurting her. He was drawing a line. One of them had to capitulate. He was saying it wasn’t going to be him.

“Look, let’s think about this. This isn’t a good place to talk. What I am going to do is finish my work on this thing and then we’ll sit down and talk about our future. Is that okay?”

She slowly nodded but didn’t look at him.

“You do what you have to do,” she said in a tone McCaleb knew would make him feel guilty forever. “I just hope you’ll be careful.”

He pulled himself over and kissed her again.

“I’ve got too much here with you not to be.”

He got up and came around the table to the baby. He kissed her on top of the head and then unhitched the chair’s safety belt and lifted her out.

“I’ll take her down to the cart,” he said. “Why don’t you get Raymond?”

He carried the baby down to the cart and secured her in the safety seat. He put her bouncing chair in the rear storage compartment. Graciela came down with Raymond a few minutes later. Her eyes were swollen from the crying. McCaleb put his hand on Raymond’s shoulder and walked him to the front passenger seat.

“Raymond, you’re going to have to watch the second game without me. I have some work I have to do.”

“I can go with you. I can help you.”

“No, it’s not a charter.”

“I know, but I can still help you.”

McCaleb knew Graciela was looking at him and he felt the guilt like the sun on his back.

“Thanks but maybe next time, Raymond. Put on your seat belt.”

Once the boy was safely in, McCaleb stepped back from the cart. He looked at Graciela, who was no longer looking at him.

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll be back as soon as I can. And I’ll have the phone with me if you want to call.”

Graciela didn’t acknowledge him. She pulled the cart away from the curb and headed up Marilla Avenue. He watched them until they were out of sight.

On the walk back to the pier his cell phone chirped. It was Jaye Winston returning his call. She was talking very quietly and said she was calling from her mother’s house. McCaleb had difficulty hearing so he sat down on one of the benches along the casino walk. He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, one hand holding the phone tightly to one ear, his other hand clasped over the other.

“We missed something,” he said. “I missed something.”

“Terry, what are you talking about?”

“In the murder book. In Gunn’s arrest record. He was -”

“Terry, what are you doing? You’re off the case.”

“Says who, the FBI? I don’t work for them anymore, Jaye.”

“Then says me. I don’t want you getting any further -”

“I don’t work for you, either, Jaye. Remember?”

There was a long silence on the phone.

“Terry, I don’t know what you are doing but it’s got to stop. You have no authority, no standing in this case anymore. If those guys Twilley and Friedman find out you’re still snooping around on this, they can arrest you for interference. And you know they’re just the type that will.”

“You want standing, I have standing.”

“What? I withdrew my authorization to you yesterday. You can’t use me on this.”

McCaleb hesitated and then decided to tell her.

“I have standing. I guess you could say I’m working for the accused.”

Now Winston’s silence was even longer. Finally she spoke, her words delivered very slowly.

“Are you telling me that you went to Bosch with this?”

“No. He came to me. He showed up on my boat this morning. I was right about the other night. The coincidence; me showing up at his place, then the call from his partner about you. He put it together. The reporter from the New Times called him, too. He knew what was going on without me having to tell him a thing. The point is, Jaye, none of that matters. What matters is that I think I jumped on Bosch too soon. I missed something and now I’m not so sure. There’s a chance all of this could be a setup.”

“He’s convinced you.”

“No, I convinced myself.”

There were voices in the background and Winston told McCaleb to hold on. He then heard voices muffled by a hand over the phone. It sounded like arguing. McCaleb stood up and continued walking toward the pier. Winston came back on in a few seconds.

“Sorry,” she said. “This is not a good time. I’m in the middle of something right now.”

“Can we meet tomorrow morning?”

“What are you talking about?” Winston said, her voice almost shrill. “You just told me you are working for the target of an investigation. I’m not going to meet with you. How the fuck would that look? Hold on -”

He heard her muffled voice apologizing for her language to someone. She then came back on the line.

“I really have to go.”

“Look, I don’t care how it would look. I’m interested in the truth and I thought you would be, too. You don’t want to meet me, fine, don’t meet me. I’ve gotta go myself.”

“Terry, wait.”

He listened. She said nothing. He sensed that she was distracted by something there.

“What, Jaye?”

“What is this thing you said we missed?”

“It was in the arrest package from Gunn’s last duice. I guess after Bosch told you he had spoken to him in lockup you pulled all the records. I just scanned through it the first time I looked at the book.”

“I pulled the records,” she said in a defensive tone. “He spent the night of December thirtieth in the Hollywood tank. That’s where Bosch saw him.”