When they spied the towers of Coldmoat several hours later, Dunk stopped to change to his good Dornish tunic and loosen his longsword in its scabbard. He did not want the blade sticking should he need to pull it free. Egg gave his dagger's hilt a shake as well, his face solemn beneath his floppy hat. They rode on side by side, Dunk on the big destrier, the boy upon his mule, the Osgrey banner flapping listlessly from its staff.
Coldmoat came as somewhat of a disappointment, after all that Ser Eustace had said of it. Compared to Storm's End or Highgarden and other lordly seats that Dunk had seen, it was a modest castle… but it was a castle, not a fortified watchtower. Its crenellated outer walls stood thirty feet high, with towers at each corner, each one half again the size of Standfast. From every turret and spire the black banners of Webber hung heavy, each emblazoned with a spotted spider upon a silvery web.
"Ser?" Egg said. "The water. Look where it goes".
The ditch ended under Coldmoat's eastern walls, spilling down into the moat from which the castle took its name. The gurgle of the falling water made Dunk grind his teeth. She will not have my chequy water. "Come", he said to Egg.
Over the arch of the main gate a row of spider banners drooped in the still air, above the older sigil carved deep into the stone. Centuries of wind and weather had worn it down, but the shape of it was still distinct: a rampant lion made of checkered squares. The gates beneath were open. As they clattered across the drawbridge, Dunk made note of how low the moat had fallen. Six feet at least, he judged.
Two spearman barred their way at the portcullis. One had a big black beard and one did not. The beard demanded to know their purpose here. "My lord of Osgrey sent me to treat with Lady Webber", Dunk told him. "I am called Ser Duncan, the Tall".
"Well, I knew you wasn't Bennis", said the beardless guard. "We would have smelled him coming". He had a missing tooth and a spotted spider badge sewn above his heart.
The beard was squinting suspiciously at Dunk. "No one sees her ladyship unless the Longinch gives his leave. You come with me. Your stableboy can stay with the horses".
"I'm a squire, not a stableboy", Egg insisted. "Are you blind, or only stupid?"
The beardless guard broke into laughter. The beard put the point of his spear to the boy's throat. "Say that again".
Dunk gave Egg a clout in the ear. "No, shut your mouth and tend the horses". He dismounted. "I'll see Ser Lucas now".
The beard lowered his spear. "He's in the yard".
They passed beneath the spiked iron portcullis and under a murder hole before emerging in the outer ward. Hounds were barking in the kennels, and Dunk could hear singing coming from the leaded-glass windows of a seven-sided wooden sept. In front of the smithy, a blacksmith was shoeing a warhorse, with a 'prentice boy assisting. Nearby a squire was loosing shafts at the archery butts, while a freckled girl with a long braid matched him shot for shot. The quintain was spinning, too, as half a dozen knights in quilted padding took their turns knocking it around.
They found Ser Lucas Longinch among the watchers at the quintain, speaking with a great fat septon who was sweating worse than Dunk, a round white pudding of a man in robes as damp as if he'd worn them in his bath. Inchfield was a lance beside him, stiff and straight and very tall… though not so tall as Dunk. Six feet and seven inches, Dunk judged, and each inch prouder than the last. Though he wore black silk and cloth-of-silver, Ser Lucas looked as cool as if he were walking on the Wall.
"My lord", the guard hailed him. "This one comes from the chicken tower for an audience with her ladyship".
The septon turned first, with a hoot of delight that made Dunk wonder if he were drunk. "And what is this? A hedge knight? You have large hedges in the Reach". The septon made a sign of blessing. "May the Warrior fight ever at your side. I am Septon Sefton. An unfortunate name, but mine own. And you?"
"Ser Duncan the Tall".
"A modest fellow, this one", the septon said to Ser Lucas. "Were I as large as him, I'd call myself Ser Sefton the Immense. Ser Sefton the Tower. Ser Sefton with the Clouds About His Ears". His moon face was flushed, and there were wine stains on his robe.
Ser Lucas studied Dunk. He was an older man; forty at the least, perhaps as old as fifty, sinewy rather than muscular, with a remarkably ugly face. His lips were thick, his teeth a yellow tangle, his nose broad and fleshy, his eyes protruding. And he is angry, Dunk sensed, even before the man said, "Hedge knights are beggars with blades at best, outlaws at worst. Begone with you. We want none of your sort here".
Dunk's face darkened. "Ser Eustace Osgrey sent me from Standfast to treat with the lady of the castle".
"Osgrey?" The septon glanced at the Longinch. "Osgrey of the chequy lion? I thought House Osgrey was extinguished".
"Near enough as makes no matter. The old man is the last of them. We let him keep a crumbling towerhouse a few leagues east". Ser Lucas frowned at Dunk. "If Ser Eustace wants to talk with her ladyship, let him come himself". His eyes narrowed. "You were the one with Bennis at the dam. Don't trouble to deny it. I ought to hang you".
"Seven save us". The septon dabbed sweat from his brow with his sleeve. "A brigand, is he? And a big one. Ser, repent your evil ways, and the Mother will have mercy". The septon's pious plea was undercut when he farted. "Oh, dear. Forgive my wind, ser. That's what comes of beans and barley bread".
"I am not a brigand", Dunk told the two of them, with all the dignity that he could muster.
The Longinch was unmoved by the denial. "Do not presume upon my patience, ser… if you are a ser . Run back to your chicken tower and tell Ser Eustace to deliver up Ser Bennis Brownstench. If he spares us the trouble of winkling him out of Standfast, her ladyship may be more inclined to clemency".
"I will speak with her ladyship about Ser Bennis and the trouble at the dam, and about the stealing of our water, too".
"Stealing?" said Ser Lucas. "Say that to our lady, and you'll be swimming in a sack before the sun has set. Are you quite certain that you wish to see her?"
The only thing that Dunk was certain of was that he wanted to drive his fist through Lucas Inchfield's crooked yellow teeth. "I've told you what I want".
"Oh, let him speak with her", the septon urged. "What harm could it do? Ser Duncan has had a long ride beneath this beastly sun, let the fellow have his say".
Ser Lucas studied Dunk again. "Our septon is a godly man. Come. I will thank you to be brief". He strode across the yard, and Dunk was forced to hurry after him.
The doors of the castle sept had opened, and worshipers were streaming down the steps. There were knights and squires, a dozen children, several old men, three septas in white robes and hoods… and one soft, fleshy lady of high birth, garbed in a gown of dark blue damask trimmed with Myrish lace, so long its hems were trailing in the dirt. Dunk judged her to be forty. Beneath a spun-silver net her auburn hair was piled high, but the reddest thing about her was her face.
"My lady", Ser Lucas said, when they stood before her and her septas, "this hedge knight claims to bring a message from Ser Eustace Osgrey. Will you hear it?"
"If you wish it, Ser Lucas". She peered at Dunk so hard that he could not help but recall Egg's talk of sorcery. I don't think this one bathes in blood to keep her beauty. The Widow was stout and square, with an oddly pointed head that her hair could not quite conceal. Her nose was too big, and her mouth too small. She did have two eyes, he was relieved to see, but all thought of gallantry had abandoned Dunk by then. "Ser Eustace bid me talk with you concerning the recent trouble at your dam".