Chapter Four
GIVEN WHAT she'd been told and what she'd learned on her own about cults, Tessa had expected to be disturbed on any number of levels while she was among the congregation of the Church of the Everlasting Sin, but what she hadn't expected to feel was a sensation of sheer unreality. It was, she decided, a surface place.
The surface was pretty, ordered, calm, peaceful. The people Ruth introduced her to were smiling and seemingly content and greeted her with courteous welcome. The neat little houses boasted neat little well-manicured lawns and pruned shrubbery. The childrenall home-schooled, she was toldlaughed and ran around the very nicely designed playground off to the right of the main square, pausing in their play only long enough to run up, when summoned by Ruth, to be introduced en masse to Tessa.
"Children, say hello to Mrs. Gray. She's visiting us today."
"Good afternoon, Mrs. Gray. Welcome." It was a chorus, bright and cheerful, accompanied by big smiles.
Tessa wasn't all that familiar with children, but this bunch struck her as exceptionally polite. And rather eerily similar in that they were all impeccably dressedespecially for playtimewithout so much as a smudge of dirt or visible wrinkle in their neat white shirts, lightweight bluejackets, dark pants (the boys), and dark skirts (the girls).
"Hi," Tessa responded, wondering how many of these kids Sarah had known, if there were any she had been close to. By all accounts, she had taken a special interest in the children. "No school today?"
"Our children are home-schooled," Ruth responded.
"And it's our playground time," a dark, solemn-eyed boy told Tessa. "Not as cold as yesterday, so we can be outside longer."
"I see."
Ruth shooed them away before Tessa really had time to pick out any more individual faces; she wasn't even certain whose small hand touched hers briefly before the group ran back to their playground.
"They're all fine children," Ruth said to her.
"I'm sure they are." What else could she say?
"Perhaps you can visit with them longer on another visit. I didn't want you to be overwhelmed, Tessa. So many faces, so many names. I do want you to meet some of our members, even though we have plenty of time for you to get to know everybody."
"Yes. Yes, of course."
Ruth continued the tour, pointing out this or that as they walked slowly around the Square.
As scrubbed and neat as the children, all the buildings were beautifully maintained, as though they had been freshly painted only this morning.
Especially the big, gleaming white three-story church itself, which was very churchlike, with rows of stained-glass windows (though generic abstract patterns, with no Biblical scenes Tessa could identify) and a tall steeple with a simple cross atop a bell tower.
She could see the bells gleaming even from ground level.
The church was surrounded, like all the houses in the little neighborhood, with a neat lawn. Wide steps led from the front walkway that was pretty and cobbled up to the gleaming wooden doors that were wide and welcoming.
But there was something just a little bit off in all the Norman Rockwell Americana perfection, and it wouldn't take a psychic, Tessa decided, to pick up on it. There was an eerie sameness to the faces, the smiles, the simple clothing, even the gestures. From the children to the adults, they all looked almost indistinguishable.
Interchangeable.
I wonder if the missing people were just replaced by fresh ones, new recruits. And nobody noticed. Or cared.
That was a horrifying thought and one Tessa shoved grimly from her mind as Ruth continued to introduce her around.
"Welcome, Mrs. Gray. We're happy to have you here."
"Thank you." Tessa shook hands with a couple who looked a lot like the previous six couples she had met since her arrival: somewhere in their thirties, a faint scent of soap clinging to them, a kind of bedrock serenity in their smilesand an odd, shiny flatness in their eyes.
Stepford. I'm in Stepford.
"Everyone would love to meet you on this visit, of course, but we know that would be too much," Ruth told her as she led the way, finally, back toward the church. "Plus, many of our members work in town and haven't gotten home yet today."
The church, peaceful and perfect in appearance, was now marred slightly by a dirty Jeep parked nearby, the logo on its side the seal of the Grace Police Department.
Cops. Cops she could trust?
Or cops who would prove to be one more layer of deceptive normality in this place?
"I had no idea the Compound was so large," Tessa lied, ignoring the Jeep. "How many families live here?"
"We have twenty-one cottages, plus the gatehouse," Ruth answered. "I believe all of them are currently occupied. And, of course, we have rooms and dormitories for our single members in the church itself."
"Really? Isn't that unusual?"
"Not for our church."
Since she wasn't offered any opening to probe that further, Tessa shifted the subject a bit. "No members live outside the Compound?"
"A few, though not many. We're a community," Ruth told her, smiling. "We don't require all our members to live here, but so far most have chosen to. Eventually."
That last word was oddly chilling, and Tessa did her best not to shiver visibly; it was a very mild day for January after all. "I already have a home in Grace," she pointed out.
"Your husband's family home. Forgive me, but can it really feel like home to you?"
Tessa allowed the silence to stretch as she walked beside the other woman up the wide steps to the open front doors of the church, not answering until they stepped over the threshold. "It doesn't," she admitted after a moment, being more honest than Ruth could know. "The house is too big and I ramble around in there. Sometimes it almost echoes it's so empty." She allowed her voice to wobble a bit, her eyes to tear.
"I'm sorry, TessaI didn't mean to upset you."
"No, it's just The happy families out there The way I feel in Jared's family home"
"There's a restroom off the vestibule where you can have a few moments alone. It's as safe a place as you'll find in there. The stalls are tiled from the floor almost to the ceiling, and the doors are big. The recreation area where people tend to congregate at odd hours is downstairs, so the main floor restroom isn't used much except around the times of services."
Tessa managed to squeeze out a tear. "If you don't minda restroom?"
"Of course, of course. It's just over there, ladies' room on the left side." Ruth's voice was warmly sympathetic. "I'll be here. Take your time."
The restroom was fairly large and brightly lit, with six stalls and three sinks, and like everything else she had seen was exceptionally neat, to the point of appearing to be newly scrubbed. Tessa looked around briefly but wasted little time in locking herself into the stall farthest from the door.
Hollis's information had been right: These stalls were designed for a great deal more privacy than those usually found in a public facility. In fact, the stall struck Tessa as a bit claustrophobic, and she had to take a deep breath as she closed the toilet lid and sat down on it.
Focus. Concentrate.
She was wary of opening herself up completely in a place where she felt so uneasy and even trapped, but she wasn't at all sure control was a luxury she could afford. Still, as she closed her eyes and concentrated, she did her best not to drop her shields completely.
Pain.
It was immediate and intense, fire burning along her nerve endings, exploding in her mind, and it took everything Tessa had not to cry out. Her hands reached out to the tile walls on either side of her, and she instinctively braced herself, or tried to, pushing against the cold tile, against the hot, shimmering pain, against the incredibly strong presence she was instantly aware of.