Chapter 5
The Colicoid ship was massive and utilitarian. Even the Colicoid diplomatic ships were pressed into service as cargo ships, and the planet's ship designers were known for ingenuity rather than style. They managed to pack more cargo space into a cruiser than anyone in the galaxy. They did this by compressing living space. Cabins and public areas were cramped and oddly shaped, mostly tucked into stray corners. It would not be a luxurious flight.
Luckily Obi-Wan had reached the point where he barely registered his surroundings, except as points of interest for the mission ahead. Anakin, however, was appalled at the sheer ugliness of the Colicoid transport. When it came to spaceships, Anakin was a firm believer in speed and elegance.
"I thought diplomatic ships were supposed to be the best in the planet's fleet," he murmured to Obi-Wan as they boarded. They followed a guide down a narrow hallway, squeezing past equipment panels and cargo boxes.
"This is the best in the fleet," Obi-Wan murmured back.
They reached the bridge. The command center was smaller than it should be for a ship of this size. The pilot crew was jammed up against one another and the tech consoles. Even the ceiling was put into service for cargo — finely spun durasteel nets were suspended there and filled with cargo boxes. The full load blocked out the lighting from above, creating pools of shadow on the bridge. The total effect was one of deep gloom.
"Captain, the Jedi team has arrived," their guide reported.
The captain waved a long hand behind him but did not turn. "Dismissed.
" The guide turned and left. The captain still ignored the Jedi. He stared down at a data screen mounted on the tech console.
Obi-Wan knew the Colicoids were barely tolerating their presence. If the captain wanted to play a game of patience with him, he would not engage. He cautioned Anakin with a look — he was not to betray any impatience. Anakin immediately composed his features and stilled a restless tapping finger on his utility belt. Obi-Wan could still tell his Padawan was restless, but the Colicoids would not.
The Colicoids were an intelligent species with armor-plated trunks, long, antennaed heads, and powerful stinging tails. Although renowned as deadly fighters, they had long ago turned their considerable energies toward trade. They had transferred their ruthlessness to commerce and were a wealthy species as a result.
The captain turned at last. His expression was not welcoming. He clicked two of his spidery legs together in impatience.
"I am Captain Anf Dec. We will be departing in six minutes," he said.
"You are free to walk about the ship, but do not get in the way."
Obi-Wan matched the captain's brusque tone. "If any suspicious vessels enter our range, you will notify us?"
"No need for alarm. We do not expect trouble. Or so the Senate tells us." The captain gave an eerie smile that showed straight rows of sharp teeth. "The Jedi are aboard."
"Nevertheless, we expect to be notified if there is a potential problem," Obi-Wan said firmly.
The captain shrugged. "As you wish." The words came like explosive puffs of air. Obviously Captain Anf Dec did not appreciate getting orders, only giving them. "Now go. We are busy."
Obi-Wan and Anakin turned and left the bridge. "Friendly guy," Anakin said.
"I think it's best if we stay out of the Colicoids' way," Obi-Wan responded.
"No problem," Anakin muttered under his breath.
They proceeded to their cramped cabin, which they would have to share.
Anakin placed his survival pack neatly by his narrow sleep-couch. Obi-Wan knew that his Padawan was still upset by the meeting at the Temple. Usually he would have to counsel Anakin at the start of a mission to settle down.
The boy would run on an excess of energy and expectation and want to see everything at once. The Anakin he knew would have tossed his survival pack down and suggested a quick tour of the ship. But this new, silent Anakin merely sat on the sleep-couch and gazed at his surroundings with an uncurious eye.
Obi-Wan debated whether to speak. He knew what was bothering Anakin — the boy was troubled by both the Jedi Council's continuing wariness of his suitability and the implication that he was somehow different from other Jedi students. That did not worry Obi-Wan too much. He knew that Anakin's belief in himself was strong. Anakin was different, and he was learning that this was part of his strength. It did not have to set him apart. And Obi-Wan had told him before that he should not take the Council's rigor personally. It did not mean that they didn't think he would make a fine Jedi. It was their job to look for every possible trouble spot, to be harder on the Jedi students than their Masters would be. No doubt they, as well as he, had noticed Anakin's involuntary movement toward his lightsaber when slave trading was mentioned.
No, Anakin's silence was not about the Council's reaction, or Palpatine's words. He was hurt because Obi-Wan had tried to get out of the assignment. It suggested to his Padawan that he did not have faith in him — which was far from the truth.
Words that hurt were spoken in a moment. But words that heal take time and reflection.
Obi-Wan could not reassure Anakin that his words were spoken out of haste. He was worried about the effect of this mission on Anakin. If they did engage with Krayn, Anakin's deepest emotions would be tapped. Obi-Wan knew his Padawan had not begun to truly deal with the years of shame and anger he had passed as a slave. Someday he would confront this. Obi-Wan fervently wished that day to be in the future, after Anakin had honed his training.
Yet he had the feeling that this was exactly why Mace Windu and Yoda had chosen them. It was not the first time Obi-Wan had suspected the Council of being too harsh.
They had suspended Obi-Wan once, taken away his Jedi status. He had been thirteen years old, and at the time he had not understood the Council's severity. He was forced to bypass his feelings to examine his own role in his suspension. He had been wrong, and he had come to understand that. The knowledge of this had shamed him. It was only through Qui-Gon's counsel that he had learned that his shame was preventing him from healing.
Could he teach his Padawan the same lesson? Qui-Gon had done it with a characteristic balance of severity and gentleness. No one mixed the two like his Master. Obi-Wan found it difficult to be severe with Anakin. He had been deeply influenced by his Master, but he was not Qui-Gon. He would have to find his own way.
The Master must guard against guiding the Padawan according to his own needs. He or she must balance care and discipline with the acknowledgment of the Padawan's separateness, his or her distinct character.