Tarrin had been a little grateful that she'd interrupted them before it got too serious, but now he was having third thoughts. What was Jesmind doing outside his door? Was she following him around? And what right did she have to barge in that way? His life was his own, and he didn't appreciate Jesmind trying to interfere.

He looked her right in the eyes. "It seems awfully convenient that you just happened to be walking by at the right time," he said in a dangerous voice. "Or was it more than coincidence?"

"I was following you," she admitted without batting an eye. "I'll give you space, Tarrin, but I'm not going to let you wander around alone. This Tower isn't as secure as Jenna likes to think."

Her admission surprised him, yet it didn't. But it certainly made him angry. "I don't need protecting, Jesmind!" he said hotly. "When I moved down here, it was so I could have my own space, my own time. You and Kimmie and Triana aren't going to get around that by standing outside my door and following me everywhere I go!"

"Until you're back to normal, I'll follow you around if I damn well please," Jesmind snapped. "You're too vulnerable like this!"

"I am not a child!" Tarrin shouted at her, jumping to his feet. "Why won't you Were-cats get that into your head?! I don't need a nurse, I don't need a bodyguard, and I damn well certainly don't need you three hiding in my closet!"

"You're in no condition to dictate terms," she said in a seething tone. "Until we can change you back I'll-"

"Whoever said I wanted to be changed back?" he shouted at the top of his lungs. "This is my life! Ever since I woke up, everyone's been telling me where to go, what to do, and you're all trying to plan my life for me, and I'm sick of it! Do you hear, I'm sick of it! It's my life! If I want to change back, I will, but if I want to stay like I am, then that's what I'm going to do!"

The sheer vehemence in his angry voice took Jesmind aback. She stared at him in shock, putting the back of her large, furry hand to her chin and gaped at him with wide eyes. "T-Tarrin!" she said in a startled tone. "I-"

"I don't care what you think!" he shouted, cutting her off. "I like you, Jesmind, but I don't need you treating me like I'm another one of your children! So if you don't mind, kindly butt out!" he said in a mighty crescendo, shaking his fist and stamping a foot to emphasize his ultimatum that much more. When she didn't say anything, he shooed her with his hands. "Go on! Get out of my room! And if you don't want me to avoid all you Were-cats completely, then stop following me around! Do you hear me? Stop it! Just leave me alone!"

Jesmind stared at him in shock, and, to his surprise, fear. She was looking at his hands, and she took a step backwards when he raised both arms to look down, to look at where she was looking. He nearly jumped back himself when he saw that both of his hands were glowing with a strange magical light!

It made him feel something inside, a power, a force that had filled him. He'd been too angry to notice it before, but now he could feel it. It was a very warm energy, a very strong one, and it was like the light of the sun boiling around in his belly. He had no idea how it got there or what he was supposed to do with it, but it simply drained away by itself as he was trying to fathom how it got there to begin with.

He understood. He'd gotten mad, and in his anger, some part of his mind that still remembered had reached out and touched the power of Sorcery. Even if he couldn't remember how to use it with his conscious mind, some other part of his mind could, and had done so.

"I-We'll talk tomorrow, Tarrin," Jesmind said in a hesitant voice as the magical light faded from his hands, and he stared at them in surprise. "When you're calmer."

He heard her leave, but he didn't look up at her. All he could do was stare at his hands in wonder.

To: Title EoF

It was all just too confusing.

The first issue, obviously, was Auli. Tarrin hadn't been prepared for her to do what she did, and though half of him wanted her to keep going, the other half of him didn't. Part of him was embarassed for being so easily seduced, but another part of him was angry that he hadn't gotten to see how far Auli was willing to go. He believed Jesmind when she said that Auli probably had no feelings for him, was only out to conquer him, but another part of him saw absolutely nothing wrong with that. If all she wanted was a good time, then that part of him was more than willing to accommodate her. That in itself seemed wrong to him; he was raised to believe in marriage, and not fooling around until he was married. But there was another part of him, probably something left behind from his time as a Were-cat, that thumbed its nose at that moral conditioning and saw Auli as a good time waiting to be had.

His feelings for the Sha'Kar complicated the issue. He liked Auli. Alot. She was funny, friendly, adventurous, and he thoroughly enjoyed spending time with her. Even now, knowing that she had tried to seduce him-or at least he thought she did, he'd never know thanks to Jesmind-he found himself looking forward to the next time she and Dar and himself all went out and had fun. He didn't want to avoid her, even if he didn't want her chasing him. He really liked her as a friend, and he wasn't going to stop talking to her, no matter what Jesmind said.

He honestly wasn't sure what to do about her. He spent almost all night sitting or laying in bed thinking about it. A good deal of that time was thinking about how nice it felt when she kissed him, he had to admit. He still was of two minds about her pursuit of him. Part of him wanted to pursue her, the other part didn't. Part of him was loyal to Jesmind and Kimmie, the other part realized that he was a different person now, so there was no true reason for him to remain so. Part of him realized that getting involved with Auli was probably going to cause more trouble than it would be worth, and the other part of him was willing to take the punishment if only to enjoy the crime. Part of him thought it improper to think things like that until he was married, the other part called that moral part of him all sorts of names and told him to seize the moment. Part of him saw Auli as a temptation, as a test of his moral character, the other part reminded him that so long as they were both willing, what harm could it do? Auli couldn't get pregnant by him. They were two different races. So there could be absolutely no harm done if she truly was willing to take it to that ultimate level.

And besides, Auli was beautiful. What healthy, sane man could look at her and not want to be with her?

That, he realized, was the half of the main part of the problem. If she'd been a plain woman, an average woman, he probably would have said no. But she was Sha'Kar, ethereal, almost breathtakingly beautiful, and that beauty was a more effective weapon against his morals than anything else could have been. The other half of the problem was the fact that Auli was his friend. He liked her, he enjoyed spending time with her, and he wasn't going to ignore her, even if he decided that he didn't want to pursue a relationship with her. That would make spending time with her tricky, he knew, but he'd try. She was too much his friend to distance himself from her just because she wanted to take their relationship to another level. As long as she wasn't bitter about him rejecting her, he was more than willing to keep on being her friend.

The other issue was with Jesmind and the Were-cats. He was surprised that Jesmind had been following him around, but he guessed that he shouldn't have been. What bothered him more than that was how they were treating him, like he was a toddler still in diapers and tied to his mother's apron, trying to run his life. Triana had done it to him from the moment he'd woke up, and now Jesmind was trying to do it. Kimmie, thankfully, didn't seem to be willing to do it, only obeying Triana's orders. At least she partially understood how their controlling him made him feel. Tarrin was a very independent young man, and having them lord over him like that was really aggravating him.