When Brian and I were finally alone in the apartment, he turned to me. I held up a hand to forestall whatever he’d been about to say.

“Can it wait until I’ve made a fresh pot of coffee?”

Dominic had brought me some fabulous, extra-strong Italian roast that I was dying to try. He’d probably meant me to make it for the meeting, but I wasn’t about to share my treasure with seven other people.

Brian gave me one of his boyish grins. “It can wait. I know better than to get between you and your coffee.”

“Smart-ass,” I replied, but I meant it affectionately.

Brian followed me into the kitchen and watched in silence as I scooped out fragrant coffee and filled the pot with water. I set the pot to brew, then turned and leaned my butt against the counter, examining the man I loved, trying to get a feel for what he was thinking. But, unlike me, Brian was a pro at hiding his thoughts.

“Okay,” I said as the coffeepot began to gurgle. “What’s up?”

His eyebrows arched. “I need an excuse to want to talk to my girlfriend?”

“Of course not,” I answered irritably. “But considering how we left things, I don’t think you’re here to make small talk.”

Brian reached into the cabinet beside my head and got out a coffee mug. Without another word, he pulled the carafe from the coffee maker. A couple drops of coffee hissed against the hot plate, but I’d never abide a coffee maker that made you wait until the pot was done before you could get a cup, so there wasn’t much of a mess. There was only enough coffee in the pot for about a third of a cup, but Brian poured it into a mug and handed the mug to me before putting the carafe back.

“For medicinal purposes,” he said.

I rolled my eyes at him, but that didn’t stop me from taking a cautious sip from my mug. I managed to burn my tongue despite my caution, but it was worth it for the rich, dark flavor. It was a shame to dilute that with cream and sugar, but I only drink coffee black if I have no choice. I closed my eyes and inhaled the scent, letting the comfortable familiarity of the coffee ritual calm me.

When I opened my eyes, I saw that Brian had gotten the half-and-half out of the fridge and put the sugar bowl in front of me. Ah, the joys of being predictable. But it was nice to be able to doctor my coffee so I could pretend not to notice how intently Brian was watching me.

“I had an idea during today’s meeting,” he said. “I want to run it by you, but I don’t want you to answer right away. Just promise me you’ll think about it.”

Uh-oh. I didn’t like the sound of this. I tore my attention away from the coffee and glanced at him cautiously. “Is this one of those ideas that requires me to put down breakable objects before you present it?” I asked, holding up the coffee mug for display.

A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “I’m not sure. Why don’t you put it down just in case?”

I made a face at him, but put the coffee mug down. I had no clue what he was about to say, and that made me nervous.

“Okay,” I said, bracing myself. “Lay it on me.”

“Again, remember that I don’t want you to answer me now. I just want you to keep it in the back of your mind.”

I nodded and made a “keep talking” gesture.

“It occurred to me that we’re probably past the point where it’s necessary to keep Lugh hidden behind your human aura.”

Because of my unique relationship with Lugh, no one examining my aura could tell I was possessed, as long as I was the one driving my body. When Lugh took control, I did show up on the radar as possessed, but that happened so rarely it hadn’t been an issue. This had made my body the perfect hiding place for Lugh when Raphael first tricked me into calling him to the Mortal Plain.

It wasn’t hard to see where Brian was going with this, and I immediately bristled. “You want me to pass Lugh off to some other host?” I had so many objections to this idea I couldn’t even figure out which one to lob out first.

Brian held up his hands. “Let me finish before you bite my head off.”

I narrowed my eyes at him, my chest feeling tight and achy. I didn’t have to hear him out to see the danger signs. Brian had thought about what life would be like continuing to date me with his new understanding of just how present Lugh really was, and he wasn’t able to accept it.

I was so stunned and upset by the implications that I couldn’t think of anything to say. Brian took that as a sign it was safe for him to keep talking.

“When you were first hosting Lugh, it was pretty much just the two of you against the world, and secrecy was your best weapon. But now … Now Lugh has the council and powerful demon allies. Plus, Dougal doesn’t seem to be actively hunting him.”

“And just who would you ‘volunteer’ to be Lugh’s new host?” I asked through clenched teeth. “Not that I’m conceding your point, you understand. And if you say Andy, I’m going to …” I couldn’t think of a creative enough threat. “Let’s just say it won’t be pretty.”

Brian gave me an affronted look. “I’m not a complete moron. I’d never suggest you should give him to Andy, even if I thought Andy was willing to host him.”

“Then who?”

“If all goes as planned, tomorrow night, you’ll be kicking a demon out of an unwilling host. Who might not be in good shape when the demon’s gone. And who we’ve already determined is unlikely to have friends and family who would be distressed—or even notice—if he or she disappears.”

My jaw dropped, and I stared at Brian in utter shock. “You want me to transfer Lugh to an unwilling host who, I’ll remind you, might recover even if he’s catatonic after the exorcism?” I tried to keep my voice down, without success.

Never in my wildest dreams would I have guessed he’d propose something so patently immoral. In the past, I’d always seen him as a model citizen, law-abiding and ethical almost to a fault. True, I’d found out that I’d put him on a bit of a pedestal, but still …

Brian wouldn’t meet my eyes. “You could always have Lugh transfer temporarily, and Lugh could tell you whether he thought there was any chance of recovery. Besides, for all we know, the host will be brain-dead, not just catatonic.”

It was true that in about one percent of all cases, a host would be brain-dead after an exorcism, unable to function on even the basest level—like, say, breathing—without the demon in residence. I shook my head violently.

“So you’ll be hoping the poor schmuck we exorcize tomorrow turns up brain-dead?” I wasn’t making any attempt to keep my voice down anymore. I was so pissed I wished I hadn’t put the coffee mug down. Brian had subtly nudged it out of my reach, and if I wanted to grab it and pitch it at the wall, I’d have to go through him to do it. Actually, that wasn’t sounding like such a bad idea.

“I can’t believe what I’m hearing,” I said with a shake of my head. “You’re supposed to be one of the good guys! The good guys don’t condone possessing unwilling hosts just because it’s convenient.”

The look on his face hardened. “Oh, so it was okay to let Raphael take Tommy to save your brother the trouble of hosting him, but it’s not okay for you to give Lugh to a host who’s already damaged beyond repair?”

I couldn’t help flinching. It was a low blow, but I probably deserved it. I was being a hypocrite. Yet even knowing that, I was still fighting to rein in my temper. “What’s happened to you, Brian? I never thought I’d hear you argue that two wrongs make a right.”

Now he was getting pretty angry, too. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe it has to do with being kidnapped and tortured.” I flinched again. “Or helping Lugh commit murder. Or letting the council talk a mentally challenged host into summoning a demon. You can’t expect me to do all this crap and not be changed by it.”

I refrained from pointing out that this was one of the reasons I’d tried to break up with him when Lugh first came into my life. I didn’t want to drag him into the mud with me. But it seemed to have happened anyway.