It didn’t have to be more than that.

She’d loved him all of her life, and there was no point in trying to convince herself that would ever change. But sex was just an elemental act, and in their case a kind of gift between friends.

Single, consenting, healthy adult friends.

She was strong, smart, and self-aware enough to accept that-and keep it that way. The first step, she thought, was to untangle herself from him and get out of bed.

She started to ease away, as cautiously as she might if she’d been wrapped around a sleeping cobra. She’d barely gained an inch when his eyes opened and beamed straight into hers.

“Sorry.” She wasn’t sure why she whispered-it just seemed the reasonable thing to do. “Didn’t mean to wake you. I’ve got to get started.”

He kept her close, only lifted her hand, turning her wrist to look at the luminous dial of her watch. “Yeah, I guess we both do. In a couple minutes.”

Before she could react he rolled over, and was inside her.

He took his time. After that first shock of possession, he went slow. Long, lazy strokes that left her both weak and giddy. Helpless she floated up, felt herself all but shimmer. Pressing her face to the side of his throat, she let go.

She sighed, lingering longer than was wise.

“I guess I owe you breakfast.”

“I never argue with breakfast.”

She made herself turn away, made the effort to keep her voice light. “I’ll go start the coffee if you want to grab the shower first.”

“Sure.”

She grabbed a robe, pulling it on as she hurried out.

She avoided looking at herself in the mirror and concentrated on the practicalities. Strong black coffee and what she thought of as a full farm breakfast. Maybe she didn’t have any appetite, but she would damn well eat. No one would know she was sick with love. Again.

Better to focus on the positive, she reminded herself. She’d gotten more rest in four hours than she’d had in days. And surely that buzzing sexual tension between her and Coop would diminish now.

The deed was done. They’d both survived. They’d both move on.

Bacon sizzled in the cast-iron skillet while she warmed biscuits in the oven. He liked his eggs over easy, she remembered. At least he had.

By the time he came down, smelling of her soap, she was breaking eggs into the pan. He poured his coffee, topped her mug off, then leaned against the counter and watched her.

“What?”

“You look good. It’s nice to look at you over my morning coffee.” He glanced at the bacon she had draining, then the hash browns sizzling with the eggs. “Guess you’re hungry.”

“I figured I owed you the full shot.”

“I appreciate the breakfast, but I’m not looking for payment.”

“All the same. Anyway, I hope I can get that alarm system installed soon. I can’t expect people to keep guarding the place like it was Fort Apache. Everyone’s got their own to see to, including you.”

“Look at me.”

She glanced over as she flipped the eggs. “Why don’t you sit down? This is about ready.”

“If you’re thinking about stepping back, think again.”

With hands remarkably steady, she scooped out the hash browns. “Sex isn’t a ball and chain, Coop. I step where I want.”

“No, you don’t. Not anymore.”

“Anymore? I never-” She put up a hand as if to stop herself. “I’m not getting into this. I’ve got too much to deal with today.”

“It’s not going away, Lil, and neither am I.”

“You were gone for over ten years. You’ve been back for a few months. Do you think, really think, everything just picks up where you want it to, for as long as you want it?”

“Do you want to hear what I think and what I want? Are you ready to hear it?”

“No, actually, I don’t, and I’m not.” She didn’t think her heart could bear it. Not now. “I’m not interested in a discussion, debate, or rehash. We can be friends, or you can push until we’re not. That’s up to you. If what happened between us ruins our friendship, Cooper, I’ll be sorry. Really sorry.”

“I’m not looking for a fuck buddy, Lil.”

She let out a breath. “Okay, then.”

He took a step toward her, she took one back. And the door opened.

“’Morning. I wanted to let you know…” Gull wasn’t the quickest off the mark, but even he could sense bad timing. “Sorry to interrupt.”

“You’re not,” Lil said quickly. “In fact, you’re right on time. Coop was about to have breakfast. You can keep him company and have some yourself.”

“Oh, well, I don’t want to-”

“Grab some coffee.” She began dishing up two plates. “I’ve got to go up and get dressed. Everybody okay out there?”

“Yeah. Yeah. Um…”

“Have a seat and dig in. I’ll be back down in a few minutes.” She picked up her coffee, walked out without looking back.

Gull cleared his throat. “Sorry, boss.”

“Not your fault,” Coop muttered.

She didn’t come back down in a few minutes. In fact, she didn’t go back to the kitchen at all. She showered, dressed, then let herself out the front of the cabin.

Avoidance? No question, Lil admitted. But she couldn’t afford to bog down her mind, her heart, her spirit. The interns were her full responsibility until Tansy got back-and when she did, they’d have another cat.

She kept herself busy checking the temporary enclosure and working with the crew on the permanent habitat.

Sunny skies and rising temperatures meant she could work in shirt-sleeves for a change. It also meant more snowmelt, more mud. As fickle March headed for capricious April, the dawning of spring would bring more patrons-and more on-site donations.

For her morning break, she visited Baby, pleasing them both with a long play period with lots of scratching, rubbing, and petting.

“I swear, that one’s just a big house cat.” Mary shook her head as Lil came out of the enclosure, double-checked the locks. “Less arrogant than my tabby, come to it.”

“Your tabby couldn’t rip out your jugular if he turned.”

“Got me there. Can’t see that one turning. He’s been a sweetheart since day one. Pretty day, isn’t it?” With her hands on her hips, Mary turned her face up to the bold blue of the sky. “I got bulbs sprouting up in my yard. Crocus blooming, too.”

“I’m ready for spring. Good and ready.”

Lil took the path around, wanting to check all the animals. Mary fell into step beside her.

In their yard, the bobcats rolled and wrestled together like a couple of boys on holiday, while perched in her tree, the lynx watched them with what might have been disdain.

“I know the jaguar and the new security system are going to take a big bite out of the budget. We’re okay, aren’t we, Mary?”

“We’re okay. Donations were a little slow this winter, except for that whopper Coop gave us. That one put us far and away over last year’s first quarter.”

“Now we worry about the second quarter.”

“Lucius and I are brainstorming on some fundraising ploys. And we’ll start clicking along here with the warmer weather.”

“I’m worried the trouble we’ve been having will keep people away, and cut hard into entrance fees and on-site donations. Word gets around.” Reality, Lil knew, came in dollars and cents. “We’ll have two new animals, with Xena and Cleo, to feed, house, and care for. I’d hoped to be able to hire at least a part-time veterinary assistant for Matt this summer. I’m not sure we’ll be able to stretch the budget for it now.”

“Willy needs to catch that son of a bitch, and soon. Matt’s overworked, but so is everybody else around here. That’s the way it is. We’re okay, Lil, and we’re going to stay okay. Now, how are you?”

“I’m fine. I’m good.”

“Well, if you ask me-which you didn’t, but I’m telling you anyway-you look stressed. And speaking of overworked, what you need is a day off. A real day off. And a date.”

“A date?”