“One day I got a chance to try out for the FBI. When I was accepted, it meant uprooting to Quantico, Virginia. She didn’t want to leave her family and friends but I told her that as soon as I graduated and got a permanent assignment, we’d buy a house. Have kids. And I’d put in for a transfer back ‘home’ as soon as I could.”

“And that never happened?”

He shook his head and bit his lip. “The training took every hour of the day, every ounce of strength I had. It made my police days seem like a paid vacation. I don’t even remember when we stopped making love. It just seemed to…to sort of dry up and…”

“That happens in long term relationships,” she offered. “It’s called ‘reality’ and afflicts lots of couples.”

“I don’t know,” Harm sighed. “All I know is that I spent a lot more time with my career than my wife. It wasn’t that I didn’t love her…didn’t want to be with her. I did. I even told myself I was doing it for us. That as soon as I got ‘ahead,’ I’d slow down and we’d do all the things we planned. We never got the chance.”

“It wasn’t your fault she died.”

“I didn’t shoot her or push her off a cliff, if that’s what you mean,” he answered bitterly. “But I might just as well have. I just stopped being there for her. I killed her and I didn’t even know it. Hell, I didn’t even know she was going out. I was never home at night and when I was home in the daytime, I was usually asleep.

“I came home from an undercover operation. I’d been gone the best part of three months. I found her lying in our bed.” Tears pooled in his eyes and slid down his face. “She was in labor.”

The word hit Elgin like a physical blow and she felt herself flinch.

“The sheets were soaked and she was barely conscious. I called an ambulance and we drove to the hospital. All the way there, I couldn’t understand why she hadn’t told me. I would have been happy to have a child. A piece of us.

“She didn’t make it to the hospital. The baby came in the ambulance and the paramedics rushed both of them into emergency. After a while, this teenage kid in a white coat came out, told me he was Dr. Such-and-Such and how sorry he was but that Jeanne hadn’t survived. He told me the baby was in a bad way and needed an emergency operation to survive. Said the baby had a fairly rare blood type and that if I could give blood, it would save time trying to locate some. Asked me if I wanted to donate blood.

“My wife had just died…of course I wanted to do anything I could to save our child so I said of course. At that moment I was so shook up, I totally forgot that I’m A positive. Only after the blood work came back that I wasn’t a suitable donor did it dawn on me. The reason she hadn’t told me about the baby was because it wasn’t mine. She’d been too ashamed even to get pre-natal treatment.”

“Oh Camp…”

“Turned out it didn’t really make any difference. He died on the operating table.”

Harm wiped his face on the corner of the pillowcase.

“I don’t remember very much about the days after that. I buried Jeanne and the baby and everyone told me what a tragedy it was. I asked for a transfer. Told people I couldn’t bear to be in the same apartment, the same town…While I was cleaning out Jeanne’s things, I found a whole box full of paperback romance novels. The kind you write with lots of hot sex and happy endings. Most of them looked like they’d been read and re-read. I couldn’t believe it. My wife’s stash of porn. Flipping through them, I got angrier and angrier as I skimmed the passages. People like you had made her dissatisfied, filled her head with a lot of romantic nonsense about forbidden love affairs and steamy passion. I blamed you for her death.”

“I can understand that, Camp. Really, I can.”

“Don’t be understanding, Elgin. I don’t deserve it. Jeanne was a beautiful, healthy woman with all the needs and wants a woman has. Should have. I gave her the gift of sex. I showed her the power and the pleasure of that gift and then I took it away from her. Blaming you and the sexy books was easier than facing the truth. If it was your fault, it didn’t have to be mine. Somehow, you’d seduced her away from me. I hadn’t let her go. And it worked very well until I met you. Now I understand, about a lot of things.”

“Then let it rest, Camp. Jeanne did what she did. If she’d loved you…really loved you…she would have talked to you. Tried to work it out. Maybe you couldn’t have stayed together. No one can know that now. But I know that if she loved you…if she ever loved you, she wouldn’t want you to stop living, to be alone.”

“I don’t know…”

“Yes, you do. You know that if you’d have been killed in the line of duty, you wouldn’t have wanted her to grow old by herself. Nothing but memories to keep her warm. You’d have wanted her to get on with her life, including someone else to share it with. Wouldn’t you?”

“Of course, but…”

“No ‘buts.’ It’s time for both of you to rest in peace.” Elgin kissed him softly, the salty taste of his tears on her lips. He responded, taking her in his arms and returning the kiss, opening her lips to explore her mouth.

In a moment, his cock had resumed its hot, hard shape, rubbing against her flesh as they embraced.

“I don’t think he wants to rest,” Harm laughed, pointing downward.

“Well, then, lets see if he’d like to play some more.” Elgin slid out of his grasp and out of bed.

“What are you up to?” he asked as she rummaged in her bureau.

“Ah, here we are,” she announced, turning around and holding up a hand full of colored scarves. “Let the games begin.”

“What are you going to do with those?” he asked warily.

“We’re going to play ‘Blind Man’s Bluff,’ and you’re ‘it.’ Put your arms up at the headboard.”

“Oh no,” he told her, shoving his hands under his body. “No games.”

“Of course games,” she chuckled, dragging the smooth, silky material over his cock. “He wants to play; I want to play. Don’t be a poop.”

The materials gliding over him sent a chill of pleasure through him. Reluctantly, he raised his arms for her, watching as she tied his wrists securely to a couple of the spiral posts that made up her headboard.

“Not too tight?”

“No, I guess not.”

“Good. I use the cotton instead of the silk because it’s not so likely to slip and tighten up when you’re…ah…moving around.”

“Hey, now what?” he barked as she folded a thick, dark blue scarf and leaned toward his head.

“You’re ‘it,’” she explained with a giggle. “You can’t play the game without a Blind Man. Now hold still.” Quickly she covered his eyes, tying the scarf securely behind his head.

“Okay, now what?”

“I’ll be right back,” she laughed and he felt her get up from the bed. “I have to go find my camera.”

“Elgin!” he shouted. “Elgin, you come back here. That isn’t funny.” Tugging, he couldn’t move his wrists.

“Don’t get so excited,” she told him as he heard her bare feet pad back into the room. “At least not yet.” He felt the weight of her as she climbed back into the bed. “Hmmm, you look positively yummy. All helpless and totally at my mercy.”

“Elgin…”

She took his cock in her hand, grabbing it firmly but not uncomfortably at the base. Something warm and thick touched the head, flowing slowly down like molasses.

“What is that?”

In answer, her lips closed around his shaft, her tongue licking the head, her mouth forming a tight vacuum. The sensation would have sent him crashing through the ceiling had he not been tied securely to the bed.

“I love hot fudge,” she sighed, raising her mouth from his cock but leaving her tongue to roll around the tip. “It’s so sweet and thick and rich. I like it on just about anything I can get in my mouth.”

Her lips moved to the base of his cock, her soft cheeks brushing his pubic hair and sac, her tongue moving around the shaft as it traveled slowly upward, making sure that not a drop of chocolate escaped her.