"I realize that you are not pleased by my news, Mr. Hardesty," she said. "But surely you must know how dread-fully restricted life is for an unwed woman of my age. Things were easier in the country. The rules of propriety are somewhat more relaxed there. But here in town, a single woman is easy prey for those who would spread malicious gossip. When one adds to that my involvement in a great scandal and the fact that I am an author of sensation novels, well, you can see the enormity of my problem. It was so much simpler to let Caroline Connor disappear."
He thought about how often Julia, before her marriage, had railed against the restraints Society imposed upon young ladies. "I am aware that the proprieties can be annoying. But I would remind you that there are some very good reasons for those restrictions. The world is a dangerous place for women. There are any number of vicious rogues at every level of society who do not hesitate to take advantage of females."
Her gloved hand tightened fiercely around her fan. "And the most dangerous ones are those who move in the most elevated circles," she said in a voice that was barely above a harsh whisper.
There was a short, tense silence. He said nothing but the part of him that was always on the alert to take note of the unusual or the unexpected registered her vehemence. Evidently the scandal in which she had been embroiled had involved a gentleman who inhabited exclusive circles.
She exhaled deeply. "You may trust me when I tell you that I am well aware of the realities of the world, sir. I appreciate your concern but you need not waste your energy lecturing me on the proprieties."
She had every right to call herself whatever she wished in order to live her life on her own terms, he reminded himself. "I beg your pardon," he said quietly.
"Forgive me for snapping at you. As you can see, the subject is an unpleasant one for me."
"You have made your point. Unfortunately, this sudden change in your marital status only serves to make an al-ready complicated situation considerably more difficult."
"Nonsense," she said hastily. "Nothing need change between us."
He almost smiled at that. "Come now, we both know that you are not that naive"
She winced and turned her head toward the window. "Are you angry?"
Was he? He was not sure. "Let's just say that you have put me in an exceedingly awkward position."
"There is absolutely no need for you to take that view." She was anxious now. "The world believes me to be a widow and I see no reason to disabuse anyone of that notion. You may continue to treat me exactly as you did be-fore I told you my secret."
"Do you really think that is possible?"
She made an exasperated little sound. "It is not as though I am a fragile flower. You said yourself that the subjects and themes of my novels imply considerable experience of the world."
"You may be a lady of some experience," he admitted, "but you nevertheless have a reputation to protect"
"On the contrary." Bitterness laced the words. "Caroline Connor had a reputation to protect. But it was ripped to shreds three years ago. Mrs. Fordyce has nothing to worry about in that regard."
'That is a matter of opinion."
She gave him a reproachful look. "Who would have thought that you would prove to be such a prig and a high stickler, sir?"
The accusation caught him off guard. He found himself smiling slightly. "I assure you, I am even more astonished than you are to discover that side of my nature."
She folded her arms beneath her breasts and tapped the pointed toe of one high-heeled shoe. "Well, I suppose that it is my turn to apologize. I never intended to place you in what you term an awkward position, sir."
"I realize that was not your objective." He hesitated. "You have a right to your secrets, Caroline, just as I have a right to mine."
"On that we are agreed."
He struggled to deal with the dangerous brew of passions she stirred within him. He felt an almost overwhelming urge to take her into his arms and kiss her until she was breathless, until she forgot the bastard who had ruined her in Chillingham. But he also wanted to do something that was far more reckless, something he had never done with any other woman. For some obscure reason that he could not explain, he felt compelled to balance the scales between them. He had unintentionally prodded her into revealing some of her secrets. He wanted to repay her by revealing one of his own.
"Will you come with me to another part of town?" he asked. "There is something I want to show you"
"Now? Tonight?"
"Yes" He did not know what had possessed him; he only knew that he could not turn back. "I promise you that you are in no danger from me."
She seemed startled. "I do not fear you."
Perhaps she would refuse to accompany him. Perhaps that would be for the best. Nevertheless, he found himself waiting as though his entire future depended on what she said next.
"Very well," she said quietly. "My aunts will be out quite late tonight. They will not be home to worry and fret if I am late."
Before he could change his mind, he stood, raised the trapdoor and gave Ned a familiar address.
SIXTEEN
Accompanying Adam on this journey by night was far and away the most exciting thing she had ever done in her life, Caroline thought. A strange, feverish anticipation was building within her. Where was he taking her? What did he intend to show her?
But she did not ask any questions. She sensed that what he planned to reveal was extremely important and meaningful to him. He needed to go about the matter in his own way.
She pulled her wrap more tightly around her shoulders and looked out the carriage windows at the fog-shrouded streets. They were traveling into a less prosperous neighborhood. The gas lamps were spaced farther apart on these narrow streets. There were fewer lights in the windows and far less traffic. The dark entrances of the alleys were ominous enough to send small chills down her spine.
They passed a tavern. Through the grimy windows she could see men dressed in rough working clothes and a handful of women in shabby gowns. They sat at tables drinking from tankards and gin glasses.
"Do not be alarmed," Adam said, watching her face. "This is a poor neighborhood, but I know it well. You are in no danger."
"I am not afraid." Not so long as I am with you, she added silently.
The carriage turned a corner and went down a gloomy lane. A woman in a faded gown lounged in the light of a gas lamp. When she spotted the vehicle, she lowered her shawl to reveal her bare breasts and called out in a drunken, rasping voice, "I'll show you some fine sport 'ere, sir. The price is a bargain for what I'm offering" Then she scowled. "What's this? I see ye've already found some entertainment for the evening. Well, maybe next time. I'll be here, sir. Look for me. My name is Nan."
"I feel so sorry for that woman," Caroline whispered. "You are not shocked?" Adam asked.
"I am aware that very little stands between a female with no resources and a miserable existence on the streets."
"You are right, of course" Adam reached into the pocket of his coat, withdrew a small packet and tossed it out the window with a casual, practiced motion of his hand. The prostitute hurried forward, seized the package and ripped it open.
"Thank ye, kind sir," she shouted as the carriage rolled past. "Ye're a generous man, ye are" She kissed the packet, whirled around and hurried away into the night.
Caroline knew from the manner in which the money had been wrapped and weighted that Adam had performed the same action on prior occasions.
"There was another woman under that lamp the last time I came this way," he said. "She had a bad cough. I wonder if she survived"