Then  he  stared  from  himself  to  Albert to  Death and  his  phantom expression went from shock to concern.

     'They got the teeth! All of them! They just walked in ... and ...  they ... no, wait...

     He faded and was gone.

     'Well, what was that all about?' said Albert.

I HAVE MY SUSPICIONS.

     'See that badge on his shirt? Looks like a drawing of a tooth.'

YES. IT DOES.

     'Where's that come from?'

A PLACE I CANNOT GO.

     Albert  looked down at the mysterious corpse and then back up at Deaths impassive skull.

     'I  keep  thinking  it  was   a  funny  thing,  us  bumping  into your grand-daughter like that,' he said.

YES.

     Albert put his head on one  side. 'Given  the  large number of chimneys and kids in the world, ekcetra.'

INDEED...

     'Amazing coincidence, really.'

IT JUST GOES TO SHOW.

     'Hard to believe, you might say.'

LIFE CERTAINLY SPRINGS A FEW SURPRISES.

     'Not just life, I reckon,' said Albert. 'And she got real worked up, didn't she? Flew right off the ole handle. Wouldn't be surprised if she started asking questions.'

     THAT'S PEOPLE FOR YOU.

     'But Rat is hanging around, ain't he? He'll probably keep an eye socket on her. Guide her path, prob'ly.'

     HE IS A LITTLE SCAMP, ISN'T HE?

     Albert knew he couldn't win. Death had the ultimate poker face.

     I'M SURE SHE'LL ACT SENSIBLY.

     'Oh, yeah,' said Albert, as they walked back to the sleigh. 'It runs in the family, acting sensibly.'

     Like many barmen, Igor  kept  a club under the bar  to  deal with those little upsets  that occurred  around closing time,  although  in fact  Biers never closed  and no one could ever remember not seeing Igor behind the bar. Nevertheless, things sometimes got out of hand. Or paw. Or talon.

     Igor's  weapon of choice  was a  little  different. It was  tipped with silver  (for werewolves), hung with garlic (for vampires) and wrapped around with a strip  of blanket  (for bogeymen). For everyone else the fact that it was two feet of solid bog-oak usually sufficed.

     He'd been watching  the window.  The frost  was creeping across it. For some reason the creeping fingers were forming into a pattern of three little dogs looking out of a boot.

     Then someone had tapped him on the shoulder. He spun around, club already in his hand, and relaxed.

     'Oh ... it's you, miss. I didn't hear the door.'

     There hadn't been the door. Susan was in a hurry.

     'Have you seen Violet lately, Igor?'

     'The  tooth girl?'  Igor's one  eyebrow writhed in concentration. 'Nah, haven't seen her for a week or two.`

     The  eyebrow furrowed  into a V  of annoyance as he spotted the  raven, which tried to shuffle behind a halfempty display card of beer nuts.

     'You can get that out of here, miss,' he said. 'You know the rule 'bout pets and familiars. If it can't turn back into human on demand, it's out.'

     'Yeah, well, some of us have more brain cells than fingers,' muttered a voice from behind the beer nuts.

     'Where does she live?'

     'Now, miss, you know I never answers questions like that ... '

     'WHERE DOES SHE LIVE, IGOR?'

     'Shamlegger  Street, next to the picture framers,' said Igor automatically. The eyebrow knotted in anger as he realized what he'd said.

     'Now, miss, you know the rules!  I  don't get bitten,  I don't  get  me froat torn  out and no one hides  behind me  door! And  you don't  try  your granddad's voice on me! I could ban you for messin' me about like that!'

     'Sorry, it's important,' said Susan. Out of the corner of  her  eye she could see that the raven had crept on to the shelves and was pecking the top off a jar.

     'Yeah,  well, suppose one  of the vampires  decides it's important he's missed his tea?' grumbled Igor, putting the club away.

     There was  a plink from  the direction of  thee pickled  egg jar. Susan tried hard not to look.

     ' Can we go?' said the oh god. 'All this alcohol makes me nervous.'

     Susan nodded and hurried out.

     Igor grunted. Then he went  back to watching  the  frost,  because Igor never demanded much out of life. After a while he heard a muffled voice say:

     'I 'ot 'un! I 'ot 'un!'

     It was indistinct because the raven had speared a pickled egg  with its beak.

     Igor sighed, and picked  up his club. And it would have  gone very hard for the raven if the Death of Rats hadn't chosen that moment to bite Igor on the ear.

     DOWN THERE, said Death.

     The  reins were  hauled so  sharply  so quickly that the hogs  ended up facing the other way.

     Albert fought  his way out of  a drift  of teddy bears, where he'd been dozing.

     'What's up? What's up? Did we hit something?' he said.

     Death pointed downwards. An endless white snowfield lay below, only the occasional glow of a window  candle or a  half-covered hut indicating the presence on this world of brief mortality.

     Albert squinted, and then saw what Death had spotted.

     '  's  some  old  bugger  trudging through  the snow,'  he  said. 'Been gathering wood, by the look of it. A bad night to be out,' he said. 'And I'm out in it too, come to that. Look, master,  I'm sure you've done  enough now to make sure ...'

     SOMETHING'S HAPPENING DOWN THERE. HO. HO. HO.

     'Look, he's all  right,'  said Albert, hanging on as the sleigh tumbled downwards.  There was a brief wedge  of  light below  as  the  wood-gatherer opened the door of a snow-drifted hovel. 'See, over there, there's  a couple of blokes catching him up, look they're weighed down with parcels and stuff, see? He's going to have a decent Hogswatch after all,  no problem there. Now can we go ...'

     Death's glowing eye sockets took in the scene in minute detail.

     IT'S WRONG.

     'Oh, no ... here we go again.'

     The oh god hesitated.

     'What do you  mean,  you can't walk through the door?' said Susan. 'You walked through the door in the bar.'

     'That was different.  I have certain god-like powers in the presence of alcohol. Anyway, we've knocked and she hasn't answered and whatever happened to Mr Manners?'

     Susan shrugged, and walked through the cheap woodwork.  She knew  she probably  shouldn't. Every  time she did something like this  she  used up  a certain amount  of,  well, normal.  And sooner or later she'd forget what doorknobs were for, just like Grandfather.

     Come to think of it, he'd never found out what doorknobs were for.

     She  opened the door from the inside. The oh god stepped in and  looked around.  This  did  not  take  long. It was not  a  large room. It had  been subdivided from a room that itself hadn't been all that big to start with.

     'This is where the Tooth fairy  lives?' Bilious  said. 'It's  a bit ... poky, isn't it? Stuff  all over the floor  ... What're these  things hanging from this line?'

     'They're . .  . women's clothes,'  said  Susan,  rummaging through  the paperwork on a small rickety table.

     'They're not very big,' said the oh god. 'And a bit thin ...'

     'Tell me,' said Susan, without looking up. 'These  memories you arrived here with ... They weren't very complicated, were they ... ? Ah...'

     He looked over her shoulder as she opened a small red notebook.

     'I've only  talked to  Violet  a few times,'  she  said.  'I think  she delivers the teeth somewhere and gets a percentage of the money.  It's not a highly paid line  of work. You know,  they say you can Earn $$$ in Your Spare Time but she says really she could  earn more money waiting on tables - All, this looks right