Michael leaned against the willow tree in the far corner of Corrine's backyard. He had thought he wanted to come to the party, but he'd forgotten about the Maria factor.

He was still reeling from what she said to him in the cave.

It was just too much, too quick. He didn't know what he was supposed to do now. If he went inside and she came over to him, was he supposed to dance with her? Driving around in the car with her was hard enough. But dancing. Touching. How could you do something like that after a girl said she loved you? Wouldn't she think it meant something? Didn't girls always think everything meant something?

What he really wanted was for things to go back the way they were. Where they could just hang together, have fun, watch bad movies.

Okay, maybe he'd like things back the way they used to be with some kissing added in. Now that he had the whole little sister issue out of the way forever, he would like to be able to kiss Maria once in a while.

But he didn't think he wanted some big, intense, Max-and-Liz tragic love thing. And the way Maria looked at him when she told him she loved him-it didn't get any more big and intense than that.

***

"Stacey said you had to bring Michael and Max to make up for Alex," Corrine said into Isabel's ear.

Stacey said. She wondered how many of the Staceyettes were going to come over and tell her what Stacey said. Probably every single squealing, giggling one of them. It's what they lived for.

She so did not need this tonight.

"And where's your date?" Isabel pretended to search the crown. "Is he blowing chunks in the bathroom? Or has he passed out already?"

"He had to leave early," Corrine answered. Then she rushed away.

I'll bet he did, sweetie, Isabel thought. She spotted Alex coming out of the kitchen and made her way over to him. She took the drinks out of his hands and set them on the floor by the wall.

"Let's dance first," she said. She grabbed Alex's hand and pulled him over to a tiny open space near where Doug Highsinger was dancing with Stacey. She wanted Stacey to see that she wasn't slinking around, looking like she had something to hide.

Alex put his hands on her waist, and they started to sway to the music. Isabel arched her spine and leaned back, making sure her hair brushed across Doug Highsinger's bare arm. When he looked, she did a slow, graceful return into Alex's embrace, stretching herself against his body.

She didn't need to look to know Dougie kept his eyes on her the whole way. Take that, jerk-off, she thought. He'd been panting after her since junior high, but she hadn't gone out with him ever.

Yep. He had to settle for Stacey. Isabel smiled as she slid her hands through Alex's hair. Usually she enjoyed the feel of it-thick and silky. But now all she cared about was how it looked. She wanted every guy in the room to wish he was Alex. And every girl to know that's what every guy was wishing.

When the song ended, Isabel felt confident her mission had been accomplished. "I'm going outside for a minute," she told Alex. He nodded, and she pushed her way out to the backyard. She took in a couple of deep lungfuls of the crisp night air. Then she spotted Michael over by the willow tree.

Isabel wandered over. It was the first time they'd been alone together since Max had told them about the akino. She didn't really feel like talking about it right now.

Michael wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and she leaned into him. Mmmm, yeah, that was the feeling she was looking for. To feel his strong shoulders against her back and know that he understood what she was feeling. Because he was feeling it himself.

***

Maria spotted Alex sitting halfway up Corrine's steps. She made her way over and plopped down next to him on the shag carpet. She was surprised that Corrine-the most materialistic, superficial girl Maria'd ever met-tolerated shag carpet in her own house. Maybe she'd convinced herself it had cool retro appeal.

"Have you seen Isabel? She disappeared on me," Alex asked.

Seems to be a trend, she thought. But of course, Michael wasn't her boyfriend. She couldn't expect him to spend the party with her.

"Last time I saw her, she was dancing with you," Maria answered. "By the way, it was quite a show. Girls were, like, about to start shoving dollar bills down your pants."

"Cool," Alex answered, but he seemed a little distracted.

"There's something I want to ask you," Maria told him. "In your capacity as guy best friend whose job it is to explain the workings of the male mind."

"Uh, okay." He plucked a strand out of the shag carpet and rolled it between his fingers. "What color would you say this is?"

"Burnt umber," she answered quickly. "Now, if a girl tells a guy that she loves him, shouldn't he be obligated to give her some kind of response? In words, I mean."

"Wait, let me get out my copy of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus," Alex joked, his eyes restlessly searching the crowd.

Maria was glad he was only half paying attention. If he was focusing on her the way he usually did when they talked, he'd have realized she was talking about herself, and he'd try to get all the gory details.

"I guess as your representative guy, I'd have to say that lack of words is a kind of response," Alex continued. "Maybe just not the response a girl wants to hear."

"So it means the guy doesn't feel the same way?" Maria pushed. She started chewing on the ends of her hair, then caught herself. Gross! She hadn't done that since she was about nine.

"Uhhh, well, it could," he answered. "But some guys are just not word guys. They could feel the I-love-you thing on the inside but not be able to actually spit it out."

"I just have to say that you've been no help to me," Maria informed him.

"Look, words are overrated," Alex said. "You know how someone feels about you by how they treat you. That's what it comes down to. Now I'm going to go find Isabel, the Vanishing Woman." He stood up and left Maria sitting on the steps alone.

How he treats me, she thought. How he treats me is that he's not getting close enough to treat me in any way at all.

***

Liz quietly opened her front door. She didn't know why she bothered to be quiet. Her parents always wanted her to tell them when she got home, whether they were sleeping or not.

She headed straight to their bedroom door and gave a quick double knock, followed by three slow ones. She called it the made-it-back-alive-and-drug-free knock. But only to herself, of course.

"Good night, mi hija," her papa called.

"Night," she answered. She wondered if she should phone over to Corrine's and tell Maria or somebody that she wasn't coming. No, they'd figure it out.

She wandered down the hall to the kitchen. She thought she'd get some milk, maybe even some turkey if there was any left. She knew it was going to be one of those nights when she needed a little help going to sleep.

Liz reached for the fridge handle and noticed that a new picture of her had appeared on the door. It was truly embarrassing to see her own face wallpapering the fridge.

At least when Rosa was alive, pictures of her had taken up half the space. Liz reminded herself that she had to go through the basement and see if she could find those pictures. Every single photo of Rosa had disappeared the day after she died.

Not that Liz needed them to remember her sister. She thought about her every day. The same way she'd think of Max.

If…


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