“I think I’ll visit a meditech after all,” Shanelle said with a grimace as she started to get up.

Tedra’s hand detained her. “Sit down. I didn’t mean to get off the subject, but I was getting too close to tears for comfort. This wasn’t supposed to happen to you. It shouldn’t have. And maybe we ought to let your father have a good look at you after all. Your young man needs some punishing for what he put you through, and if Challen doesn’t do it, then I’ll have to.”

Shanelle shook her head. “I don’t want him punished for something he did unintentionally. He could use a lesson or two in bedroom manners, for the benefit of the next woman… he…”

Tedra lifted a brow at the way her words trailed off. “So it bothers you, the idea of him with other women?”

“No, why should it?”

“Because you picked him, Shani. Because a part of you is already maintaining that he’s yours.”

“Well, that part will just have to catch up to the rest that says I’m not interested anymore,” Shanelle replied stiffly.

“Yes, you are. You’re just disappointed that he’s not as perfect as you’d like him to be. I’m disappointed that he’s not a warrior. But these are difficulties that can be worked out.”

“Mother, you still aren’t listening to me,” Shanelle said in exasperation.

“Maybe because I know you. And maybe because even though I’ve tried to minimalize your father’s influence on your ideas about sex-sharing, you really do share his views. You want only one man. That’s why you’ve waited this long, trying to find the right one. And this is the right one, or you wouldn’t have been willing to share sex with him the moment you met him. You went with him with every intention of opening your heart to him, of spending the rest of your life with him.”

“That’s absolutely true, but instincts can go awry, and hopes and intentions don’t always hold up to reality. I wish it had worked out, mother. I wanted it to so badly. But the plain fact is, the man is dangerous. You can’t imagine what it was like to be held by someone just as strong as father, but without his gentleness-and he didn’t even know he was hurting me. That’s what frightens me the most, and I’m not going through that again.”

“But, Shani-”

“Look at me, mother,” Shanelle cut in impatiently this time. “Do I look like I’m not serious? I have the bruises to prove I am, and if they’re already showing up on my arms from my just being drawn forward for a kiss, then let’s see what the rest looks like by now.” She whipped her blouse off-then wished to Stars she hadn’t.

She hadn’t expected quite such a dramatic showing, but she should have. Her skin did bruise easily. Shades of red, violet, and soon-to-be-black liberally covered her upper torso, the darkest patches spreading out from the sides, where she’d been squeezed too tightly. The lighter marks, which were around her breasts and lower waist, probably wouldn’t hurt to the touch now, but had yet to fade.

Shanelle blushed in embarrassment, because none of it felt quite as bad as it looked. But her mother had turned ashen and then crimson with rage. And Tedra didn’t have much more to say, merely, “The man dies!”

It took a while to get Tedra out of the emotional level she’d slipped into. Shanelle found it necessary to totally reverse her stand, reminding her mother of how easy she was to bruise, insisting that she wasn’t badly hurt, just sore.

Tedra had still done some insisting of her own. “I’m going to take him apart piece by piece, but first I’ll give him his wish and let him destroy Martha. She should have Transferred you away from him at the first indication of pain!”

“It wasn’t all pain,” Shanelle had whispered.

“What was that?”

“I said it wasn’t all pain. Martha can’t be blamed for not being able to tell what I was actually feeling, when at least half of it was-nice.”

She’d also had to repeatedly point out that the damage was only the temporary kind and would be eliminated altogether with a few minutes in a meditech, which she’d also had to promise would be done immediately.

She’d left her mother not quite back to seeing Falon as a future member of the family, but not quite so eager to dissect him, either. “I suppose I should hear the monster’s side of it first,” she allowed.

Shanelle sincerely hoped her mother never got an opportunity to meet Falon at all. For two such volatile personalities to clash, it didn’t bear thinking about. Besides, nothing could come of their meeting but more difficulties. Shanelle had made up her mind about Falon. She didn’t like admitting it, but she was basically a coward, especially where pain was concerned. And although Falon might have got his emotions in hand just before she left him, she wasn’t going to put herself in a position to experience again what it was like when he didn’t.

An hour later, having rid herself of all bruises and whatever internal injuries she had sustained- she didn’t want to know and so hadn’t asked the meditech for a report-she was beginning to experience a little anger of her own, and all of it for the man who had dashed her hopes so badly. He had no business being so careless with the kind of strength he possessed. Someone should have taught him better-he should have taught himself better.

She couldn’t begin to imagine the kind of women he must be used to, women who didn’t mind such rough handling. Stars, they must be as big and strong as he was. And where did he come from that he was so like a warrior except in the one way that would have kept her from being afraid of his strength-a warrior’s calm control? Of course, if he was a warrior, that would open up another whole avenue of fears, some worse than anticipated pain. And she’d asked him outright where he was from at least once. Why hadn’t he answered instead of asking if it mattered?

As if it mattered now. It didn’t, other than to appease her curiosity about him. And despite her resolve to never see him again, she was still curious, frustratingly so, which merely added to her anger. She shouldn’t even be thinking about him anymore, yet she couldn’t get him out of her mind.

Dressed now in the traditional chauri that all Kan-is-Tran women wore, Shanelle felt more like she was finally home. She had these sheer, scarf-like outfits in every conceivable color, but she’d picked plain white for tonight to honor her father and to appease his earlier annoyance at her visitor’s outfit. Depending on how the scarves were draped, they could be blatantly provocative or demurely feminine. Shanelle had never tried to be provocative and doubted she ever would. On her the chauri was firmly belted to keep the upper scarves covering just what they should. And the scarves of all her skirts were joined well below the hip, so the free-floating sections never parted higher than mid-thigh.

To add color to her outfit, the white belt and sandals were embedded with tobraz, the light blue gems mined in the north countries. The same gems circled her throat and dangled from her ears and both wrists. Her hair she left flowing down her back as her father preferred to see it, though she had a hair-styler that could have arranged it in any intricate manner she wanted in just a matter of moments.

She was ready to join her family for the evening meal, yet she hesitated before the mirrored wall in her dressing room, staring at the image reflected there. But try as she might, she couldn’t see any difference in herself to account for what she had experienced that day. There was a little added color in her cheeks due to her continued agitation, but that was all. So what had she expected? It wasn’t as if it had been the glowingly wonderful experience she had assumed it would be that might have put happy sparkles in her eyes. And the meditech had taken away all the physical evidence. Just because she felt so different inside…