Chapter 13

At first, I couldn’t bring myself to let the boys out of my sight.  Nana, Jim, and Emmitt all took turns talking to me, saying what I already understood.  Nothing had changed except that we now knew how Richard had died.  Though I knew they were right, it didn’t ease my fears.  Liam and Aden, clueless about what I’d witnessed, didn’t understand my sudden smothering presence and started to rebel.

Reluctantly, I gave Liam and Aden a bit of much needed distance, but my concession didn’t change my nights.  The slightest noise would bring me out of a doze, and panic would set in much like our first night there.  So the week passed slowly, and within a few days, my head ached from poor sleep and constant worry.

Each day the concern in Emmitt’s watchful gaze grew.  Thursday night after dinner, he pulled me aside.

“I’ll sleep on the couch after the boys go to bed.”

He didn’t ask, and I didn’t try to tell him no.  I hoped having him there would help me sleep through the night.

When an ominous rumbling of thunder woke me Friday morning, I had mixed feelings.  Liam and Aden would need to stay inside, but I’d forced too much inside time already this week.  Today, they would mutiny for sure.

I heard a creak in the hall outside my door then the rapid patter of feet.  Worried, I flew from bed, making it to my door just in time to look down the hall and see the boys disappear out of the apartment.  Calling their names, I raced after them.

As I reached the end of the hall, Emmitt stepped into my path.  He caught me in his arms and spun us, absorbing my momentum.  It didn’t prevent my nose from connecting with his sternum with enough force that my eyes watered.

“Ow!”  I squinted up at him.

“I’m sorry.”  A tender look crept into his gaze as he studied me.

My breath caught as he slowly lowered his head.  Was he really going to kiss me?  I hadn’t even brushed my teeth!  I closed my eyes.  My heart started to beat erratically, and I couldn’t control my breathing.  Then, his lips touched the tip of my nose.  My eyes flew open.

“I wouldn’t have stepped in front of you if I’d known you’d get hurt.”  He reached up and gently pushed back a strand of my hair that had fallen forward during our collision.

“Uh.  It’s okay.”  My thoughts jumbled together.  “Just a minute.”  Instead of continuing my chase, I pivoted on my heel and fled to the bathroom.

I rejoined him a minute later, minty fresh and with untangled hair.  He stood at the stove, watching the pan on the burner until he heard me approach.

“How are you feeling?”

I tried not to stare at his chest as he spoke.  Smacking myself against it, though painful to my nose, had been wonderful for the rest of me.

“Fine,” I said.  “No permanent damage.”

He gave me an odd look but said nothing.  Instead, he handed me a plate with a single egg and toast.  After a few home-cooked breakfasts, he’d caught onto my portion size.

With the second bite in my mouth, I realized he hadn’t been asking about my nose but about how I felt in general.  My fears revolving around Blake had abated with some decent sleep, but thanks to the platonic kiss on the nose, I was confused again.  I took a drink of the juice he’d set before me, calmed myself with a slow breath, then asked the big question.

“What are we?”

He paused mid-chew to look at me, just like he had in the diner.  It made me smile.  He swallowed and tilted his head.

“I’m not sure I understand the question.”

Of course not.  I needed a morning blush to start the day off right.

Frustrated, I stood.

“I get this.”  I leaned forward and planted a light kiss on his nose, surprising him.

“And I get this.”  I moved close to his neck, inhaled his scent, and trailed my nose against his skin as he’d done several times to me.

“And I’m told...”  His skin suddenly rippled beneath my touch, and I pulled back.

His eyes glittered as he struggled for control.

“I’m sorry,” I said, stepping away.

He followed me, moving fluidly from his stool. His calm, midnight eyes tracked every move I made.

“Don’t be.  I’m fine.  Finish your question.” His voice was rough and intense, and it made my heart drop into my stomach.

Holding my ground, I let him crowd me.  Better to leave room to turn and run than to be backed against a wall.  Not that I thought I’d need to run from Emmitt, but it never hurt to leave options open.

He didn’t stop moving until he was a hand’s width away from me.  I struggled to maintain eye contact.  I knew what I’d done to him, and I really wanted to touch him again.  But I couldn’t.  Not until I understood how he saw us.

“I, uh, was just going to say that...um.”  I cleared my throat.  “You said I’m yours and that biting equals an engagement.  But I don’t understand where that leaves us now.  What are we?”

“As you asked, we are friends,” he said.

I felt a brief stab of disappointment.  Then, he leaned in again.  He didn’t inhale or use his nose this time.  He dropped his mouth to my neck.  It wasn’t a kiss exactly, just a brush of his lips that blazed a path on my sensitive skin.  I couldn’t help myself; I lightly rested my hands against his chest and leaned into the feeling as I struggled to focus.

“But, I hope we are friends who are working their way to dating.”

It took a moment for his words to register.  Ah.  That’s right.  His dinner invitation.

“I’m not good at being friends,” he said softly, breaking contact but not pulling back.  My hammering heart appreciated the move, but my tingling skin felt bereft.  “I struggle with the boundaries of friendship.”

It was good to know I wasn’t the only one struggling.  I swallowed and dropped my hands.

“What boundaries?”  As soon as I said it, I knew the answer because something in his gaze told me he wanted my hands back where they were.

“Friends don’t get this close.  They don’t touch each other like I just touched you.  And I really want to be that close.”

I wanted that, too.  Especially when he whispered it near my ear.

“What else?”  I couldn’t believe I asked.

“You’ll have to let me know,” he said, reluctantly retreating.  “You set the boundaries.”

He turned away from me and walked to the island.  I wanted him back, crowding me.  Stupid friendship talk.  If I had more courage, I would tell him I wanted to be more than friends.  But what did more than friends mean in the wolf-world?  If I was the one setting the boundaries that defined our relationship, I needed to know the answer.  Because I didn’t, I said nothing.

Emmitt stood there a moment until the shaking stopped then he sat down.  I joined him and slowly started to eat my food.

He’d answered my question about our relationship.  But sometimes, knowing an answer was worse than dwelling on the question.

*    *    *    *

The kids stayed downstairs with Nana all morning.  After we cleaned up breakfast, Emmitt stepped out.  I used the time to research stocks.

The Sunday before, after witnessing the video, I hadn’t cared enough to explain the tip I handed to Nana.  She hadn’t asked, either.  This week I planned to be prepared, again.  The boring work drove me to distraction.  I knew some people loved it.  Richard had.  But, it wasn’t my thing.

Rain continuously pattered against the roof, keeping me company.  When Nana knocked on my open door near lunch, I willingly pushed aside my work.

“Do you have a moment?” she asked politely.

“Lots of them.  What’s up?”

She stepped in and took a seat next to me at the kitchen island.

“Emmitt’s watching the boys while they color.  I wanted to come up and let you know that I put out a call stating the person responsible for Richard’s death should step forward immediately.  No one has, yet.”