“This one shall be called Engelbert,” King John proclaimed.

Engelbert? This was another reason not to marry King John. Our baby would end up with some hideous name, and other children would mock him behind his back.

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King John didn’t look at me as he strolled around the room. I wasn’t sure he even remembered I was there. I hoped I would escape his notice altogether, but when he reached the spool closest to me, he turned and asked, “What would you name this lustrous one?” I hesitated. I didn’t know many names from the Middle Ages. I tried to remember names I’d seen in movies from the time period.

“Robert,” I finally said.

“Robert?” King John asked disapprovingly.

“Or you could call him Bob for short. Bob the spool.” King John sniffed. “Nonsense. This beauty deserves a name as radiant as she is.”

Oh. It was a she. Well, that made naming her “Bob” awkward. Instead of trying to come up with a girl’s name, I said, “I think you are best suited to name the gold, Your Highness.” He sent me a cold look. Perhaps because I had referred to him as

“you” when he kept referring to himself in plural terms.

I tried to fix my sentence. “I mean, you guys, are best suited to name the gold … you all.”

His expression didn’t change.

I cleared my throat. “I’m sorry, Your Highnesses.” His frown increased, so I added another “es” to my already long “Highnesses.” I sounded like a snake with a stutter.

“The girl understands nothing about gold,” he told me. At least he was looking at me, but since he was referring to me as “the girl,” maybe he was talking to Haverton. Or maybe he thought I couldn’t hear him. It was hard to tell with that whole insanity issue going on. I wasn’t sure whether I was supposed to answer.

King John pointed at the spool. “Her name is Alfreda and when we are married, the girl will leave the handling of the gold to us.” 171/356

I hesitated. “Um, do you mean when you and Alfreda are married?”

King John made clucking noises. “How ludicrous. Of course not.

We meant when you and we marry.”

“Oh.” Unfortunately, that part of the fairy tale was happening right on schedule.

He walked over to me, scattering the sand circle with the bottom of his robe. He didn’t even glance at it. Instead he gave me a tolerant smile. “We came to tell you the good news ourselves. If you learn to spin the straw into gold, we will marry you tomorrow morning. We know it is a rash decision, impetuous even, but what can we say? We are not ones to dally about when we’re in love.” He put his hand on his chest. “Romance makes us giddy.”

I leaned away from him. “But I already told you—a fairy changed the straw to gold. I can’t do it.”

He bent down, still smiling. “Yes, but when your fairy godfather comes tonight, you shall ask him to grant you the power to do it yourself. Then you shall spin an entire roomful.” King John straightened and took a couple of steps away from me, scattering more of the sand circle. “If you fail, tragically, we will turn you over to the executioner.” He tilted his head, considering. “Or if you fail tragically, we will turn you over to the executioner.” He bestowed another smile on me. “It’s where you put the emphasis in the sentence that makes the difference in what is tragic. Call us crazy, but we’ve always loved grammar.” Without waiting for my reaction, he turned to Haverton. “Take care of the girl. We’ve a busy day tomorrow. Either a wedding or an execution. Flexibility is our middle name.” He walked to the door, brushing up loose pieces of straw with his robes. “And Haverton, do go fetch her family so they can join her in either event.” He smiled at me one last time, then went out the door.

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• • •

My third day as King John’s guest proceeded much like my second day had. The chambermaid helped me wash and do my hair. I was given another dress, a finer one. It was maroon with a large band of gold brocade on the collar and around the drooping sleeves. I hated it immediately. I no longer liked the color gold.

As soon as I was alone, I called for Clover. He showed up at once, standing on the edge of the wash basin. His outfit was a brighter green than the last one he’d worn. He had on crisp new white stockings and sleek black polished boots. He stepped onto the table with a bounce in his step and surveyed the room.

“Morning, lass.” He held a tiny book with a spinning wheel on the cover. “I’ve got The Change Enchantment. Where’s me gold?”

“The spools are in the barn. You’ll have to zap a couple away.” He let out a disgruntled breath and slapped the book against his thigh. “I can’t do that. You have to give me the gold personally. Otherwise, I’m not making a bargain with you; I’m stealing from the king.

The UMA is picky about these sorts of details.” I inwardly groaned. King John wasn’t likely to let me near that gold again. “Can’t I just tell you it’s okay to take two?” Clover paced back and forth across the table, glowering at me from beneath his bushy eyebrows. “I already bought new clothes, and I had to grease a few hands to get The Change Enchantment. I told the blokes I’d be back with their money today. Why didn’t you summon me last night when the gold was done?”

“I fell asleep,” I said.

“Well, if you don’t want to marry King John, you’d best not fall asleep tonight. Otherwise you’ll wake up to the strains of minstrels playing the wedding march.” Clover tucked the book into his jacket with more force than was necessary. “A leprechaun can get in a right 173/356

lot of trouble for not paying his debts. What if the UMA takes away me magic? Then I’ll be no better than that ghoul of a fairy you’re dealing with now.” He looked upward, shaking his head. “Ah, it would just be me luck to end up emaciated in some children’s story, scaring tykes before bedtime.”

“I’ll make sure I don’t fall asleep tonight,” I said.

“Aye, that’s what Sleeping Beauty said before she nodded off.

Let’s hope you’re more reliable.”

And with that, he disappeared.

“Wait, come back!” I called. I wanted to ask him if he knew anything about my family. But even though I called several times, he didn’t return.

They’re okay, I told myself, but if I had said the words out loud, my liar’s hat might have gone off. I wasn’t sure I believed it.

I slumped over to the window and watched the workers in the courtyard. I saw women drawing water from the well. Men bringing barrels into the castle. A maid hanging out long white tablecloths to dry. I wondered if these were preparations for the wedding feast tomorrow.

The wedding that I still couldn’t stop.

All that day, I watched the sun make a relentless path across the sky.

When it was dark, Haverton came, and another procession of guards led me to the barn. The wizard walked ahead of me, muttering and waving his wand as though directing an invisible orchestra. Hudson stood guard at the door. His gaze met mine briefly, and then I was ushered into the barn.

Mountains of straw awaited me. Great walls of it were stacked up to the ceiling. It looked like it might avalanche down and smother us. I regarded it warily, while Haverton chained me to the beam. He tucked 174/356

the key securely in his pocket, like he’d done last night, but the wizard didn’t draw another sand circle around me. He and Haverton had a heated conversation about this. Haverton was sure I would ask my fairy godmother for rescue, not gold, but the wizard insisted that the enchantment couldn’t be given to me if I were trapped in the circle away from the fairy.

“Besides,” the wizard said, flourishing his long sleeves at Haverton, “why would she ask for escape when she’ll be crowned queen in the morning?”