“Yeah, we’re not in love.” Mila shrugged, her voice void of emotion as she looked back up at me with a disinterested expression. “We can do whatever we want.”

“Well, no, we can’t.” I frowned. “As per the contract, we both will remain faithful for the duration of the engagement.” I pursed my lips. “We don’t want anyone on the board to have any inkling that this isn’t a love match, and if you’re flirting around with a bunch of other men, it’s going to be hard to convince them of that fact.”

“Yeah, ’cause I’m the person that’s going to be flirting around.” She stepped back. “Excuse me, I need to go to the restroom.”

“Okay.” I nodded. “Do you need anything?”

“Nope,” she said as she walked away and I’m pretty sure I heard her mumbling under her breath something like, “I need you to not be an insensitive asshole.” I didn’t ask her to speak up, though. She was entitled to her thoughts and feelings. In fact, this is what I wanted. I wanted her to enjoy having fun with me, but I didn’t want her to fall in love with me. We both needed to remember what this was about. This was for fun and excitement. This was for me to fulfill my obligation and duties for the promise I’d made. I sighed as I realized that I’d made a deal with the devil and I wondered if I was going to burn in hell for the rest of my life. As I stood there, feeling uneasy, I knew that that would be a light punishment for the game I was playing. A very light punishment indeed.

Chapter Five

TJ

Two Years Ago

“I want a relationship.” Heidi’s whine was irritating my ears and I tried not to frown at her. “I want to be your girlfriend.”

“I told you I’m not looking for a girlfriend,” I said matter-of-factly and checked my watch to make sure that I hadn’t missed the beginning of the game.

“TJ Walker, did you just check your watch?” Heidi pouted. “Do you have somewhere to be that’s more important than this conversation?”

“Honestly?” I asked her, wondering if she realized just how honest I was.

“Yes,” she said, her eyes looking into mine in a surprised expression.

“Okay, well, I told Cody I’d watch the game with him tonight and kickoff is in twenty minutes, so I kinda have to leave soon.”

“But you just got here an hour ago.” She looked incredulous. “What was this? A booty call?”

“I’d have to be getting some booty for that.” I winked at her, but she didn’t laugh.

“All you want me for is sex,” she said slowly as if that was just dawning on her. I wasn’t sure why she was so surprised. I wasn’t sure why any girl was surprised when they realized I didn’t want a relationship. I never told them anything different.

“I like you, Heidi,” I said, giving her a weak smile. “I’m just not in a position to be in a relationship right now.”

“What position is that, TJ?” She growled, starting to sound angry. “The position of being an adult? The last time I checked, you were one.”

“I don’t want a relationship,” I said honestly. “And if I did, it wouldn’t be with you.” I shook my head to myself as the words came out. They were true, but I knew they were hurtful.

“You’re a dirty rotten bastard.” She glared at me and her eyes looked glossy. That was the first time a woman had called me that and to be quite honest, I agreed with her. I stared back at her and wondered if I could make it out of her apartment before she started crying. I really didn’t want to have to waste time comforting her.

“I really liked you, TJ,” she said plaintively, reaching forward and grabbing my hands. “I can help you. You can tell me anything, TJ. I can help you get through your issues.”

“I don’t have any issues.” I sighed and pulled my hands back. I was starting to feel irritated. Heidi really didn’t get it. If she wanted me to stay, there was basically only one thing she could do right now and that was to pull my zipper down and take me into her mouth, and even then I’d be resistant to staying, now that I knew she wanted a relationship and was in the “pleading for it” stage. There was nothing worse than a normally confident and attractive woman begging me for a relationship, when she knew I didn’t want that. I wasn’t sure what it was about women that made them think that they could sleep with a man enough times to make them commit. Didn’t they realize that a man wanted more than some ass to commit to someone? So many times, I wanted to tell these women that just because they let me fuck them up the ass or in some back alleyway, that wasn’t making me respect them. And the attempts to pull out my cock and suck me under the table at restaurants were too numerous to count. I wasn’t sure what manual women read that made them believe that sex was a way to a man’s heart. But it needed to be updated.

“So you’re just going to leave?” She pouted at me. “That’s it?” Tears started to roll down her cheeks and I sighed. I really didn’t have time for this. “You’re just going to leave me like this?” She pursed her lips and I felt her hands reach down to my zipper. “I want you to stay, TJ.” She slipped her fingers inside my boxers and I felt her slightly cold and trembling fingers on my shaft.

“I see,” I said, and I contemplated staying for another hour, when I heard my phone beeping. I grabbed it from my pocket and read the text message from Cody: Dude, just a heads up, Mila and Sally are coming over as well, so don’t plan on bringing any weed over. I stared at the text, pulled Heidi’s hand out of my pants and took a step back.

“Sorry, Heidi, it’s just not going to work out,” I said, giving her a quick nod and walked over to her front door. “Bye,” I said as I opened the front door and hurried out of her apartment. My mind was off of Heidi as soon as I opened my car door. There was only one woman who had any part of my mind. And that was the one woman I would never let myself have.

Present Day

The smell of honeysuckle hit me as soon as I opened my front door. It wafted through the air and surprised me as I made my way into the hallway. The smell was unfamiliar, but sweet and homey. My apartment was slowly becoming a real home and it was a weird feeling to suddenly realize that.

“Honey, I’m home,” I called out, feeling my mood lifting as I looked around the living room. Mila had added a few homey touches to my place since she’d moved in a week ago and I was pleasantly surprised at how cozy my place seemed. Everything had been going smoothly and I was enjoying coming home to her. It almost seemed like I was in some sort of movie, with the happy wife and the perfect life. All we were missing were the kids and a Golden Retriever. Oh and living in true happiness and bliss, of course. Our happiness was predicated on a lie, but I was trying to forget that fact.

“Hey.” Mila’s voice sounded happy as she came running out of the kitchen towards me. “You’re home.” She ran up to me and gave me a big hug and a kiss on the lips, her cheeks a rosy pink, and her eyes sparkling in happiness.

“I am,” I said and kissed her back, my heart feeling odd as I gazed at her. “I see you did some shopping.”

“Just some small stuff.” She laughed as she gazed around the apartment and realized just how much she’d transformed my place. There were flowers everywhere and lots of new knick-knacks, like vases and little pots and containers with candles and candy. She’d also added some new art to my walls, bright colorful Picasso prints that popped out and made the room seem grander. There was a new throw blanket on the couch that she’d gotten; it was made of alpaca wool and it was gray and soft and even though I didn’t know what an alpaca was, I enjoyed the feeling of it covering us when we lay on the couch together. I was a man and would never admit to it, but I liked the small luxuries that she’d brought to my life.