Bear rubs his hands on the front of his jeans and walks the length of the kitchen, leaning back against the units. “When Layla arrived at your house, Lizzie was a mess.” His words claw at my chest. “She calmed her down as much as possible, but Lizzie wanted to be alone, needed space to think. She told Layla she was going for a walk—”

“I shouldn’t have let her go.” Layla’s choked sobs interrupt Bear. I bite my tongue, hard, to stop hateful words from spewing out of me. She should never have let her go any-fucking-where. A coppery, metallic taste floods my mouth and I swallow deep, willing myself to remain seated.

This is all on me.

I can’t blame Layla or Bear. Fuck, I can’t blame Lizzie for leaving the bloody house. Shifting my body, I lean forward and drop my head into my hands. Me. No one but me is to blame.

“Mate?” Bear’s worried voice breaks my self-pity, and I lift my gaze to his. I’m fucking helpless and looking to my best friend for the answers, but I know there are none. “We’ll find her. Do you still have surveillance running on your house?”

I nod at him, still unable to speak. At this point, if words leave my lips it will breach a dam that needs to hold strong.

“Well, that’s where we’ll start then.”

I get to my feet and head to the door but stop at Layla’s side. Placing a hand on her shoulder, I squeeze it and she releases another sob. “Kai?” I force my son’s name out, and know she’ll understand what I’m asking.

“You don’t need to ask.”

I tap her shoulder and walk out the door.

In the background, Bear’s voice filters through. “Danny, you got my location? Yeah? Good. Get a team of three here, now.” There’s silence as he listens, then replies in a harsh tone. “No, you stupid bastard,”—he takes a deep breath—“Noah’s son.”

And there’s the kicker. I’ve put two people in danger, because I love them. I wrench open the car door and hunch myself into the passenger seat. My world may be breaking, but I need to get my shit together and fast.

“What the fuck have I ever done to deserve this?” The thought makes its way past my lips.

Bear’s just entered the car and raises his eyebrows, giving me the ‘seriously? You’re asking that shit?’ face. “It may have nothing to do with you, mate. But, we can’t take the chance with Kai, can we?”

I shake my head. No chances, not even the smallest one can be taken with him. “How can it be anything else? The only danger in her life I know of is dead.”

“She may just have walked further than she intended. For all we know she could be back at your place and wondering where the hell Kai is.”

“So how do you explain the fucking text? And why have you put at three-man team on my son?” I’m pushing for answers I already know.

His grip tightens on the steering wheel and his jaw flexes as he starts the car. “Because, we both know the shit you’ve done in your life. Just because most of it was done under the umbrella of our fucking country doesn’t mean you haven’t made enemies. If anyone found out who you were, you’d be a target.” He rubs a hand over his forehead, a clear sign of stress in Bear, and he doesn’t give many away. “The last op you did, the one I sent you on. You let them see you.”

My last op? Nickoli Aqulia. He was a sick bastard. Human trafficking, child prostitution, drug trafficking, you name it, he did it. That scum took great pleasure in sampling his business, all of it. How a man becomes so depraved, I have no idea, and I’m glad I killed the sick fuck. His father, Alberto, tortured me himself, not a task he took lightly. Waterboarded, beaten, starved, bound, but the one thing that scars me, haunts me, was mild in comparison. If he holds Lizzie captive… A shudder runs through my body and the silence between us extends.

“We’ll sort it out, mate, okay? Wherever she is, we’ll find her.” Bear’s measured voice breaks the silence.

At this point, I’m not sure if he’s reassuring me or himself. We pull into my driveway a few minutes later. Pulling Bear’s keys for my house from his glove box, I bolt from the car to the front door.

As I push open the door to my home, I stop in my tracks. Glaring at me from the floor is something I never thought I would see again, never wanted to see again.

“What’s wrong, mate?” Bear queries from behind me, as I bend down to pick up the innocuous grey business card.

My heart rate picks up, and my breaths become ragged as I stare at the logo. It’s a pair of hands making shadow pictures. The shadow is of a dog imaged as a real one. The words ‘Crisis Prevention’ are engraved into the front. I turn the card over and I want to fall to my knees. I don’t turn to look at him, I can’t. I know he still deals with the old crew. The bastard still works special ops.

“How long?” I spit the question at Bear, like I don’t know who he is. This small card has me questioning the loyalty of my own brother. He may not be my brother by blood, but he’s my brother in blood, which in our world amounts to the same fucking thing. We don’t keep secrets from each other. Why the hell would he not tell me I was being watched? My skin prickles with awareness as Bear approaches me, and looks over my shoulder. His sharp intake of breath lets me know he’s seen the card, and read the words.

“Since we left, mate. What did you think would happen? You thought we could just leave and walk away? I couldn’t prove it but I had my suspicions. You know just as well as I do how they work. Of course they’d know where you were,” he growls, his tone exasperated. I turn sharply, which makes him take a step back.

“Was it you?” The chill in my voice startles him as I pin him with a hard glare. We’ve stood side by side through everything, he’s always had my back.

Now I’m asking him if he would betray me.

He drops his head before looking me square in the eye. “You think I’d do that to you?”

“I don’t know what to fucking think.” I’m losing my grasp on reality at an alarming rate. “You sure as shit haven’t told me they knew where we were.” They have Lizzie, my angel, in their hands, and my sanity is tearing at the seams.

“You honestly thought they didn’t know? Bollocks, Noah. You’re brighter than that. I didn’t take you for a naive pussy. And for the record, mate, if I’d wanted to hurt you all I needed to do was say I’d shagged her, not kidnap her.” My fists tighten at my sides, but Bear shakes his head, appeasing me. “I assumed you knew because they always fucking know. They would have known where you were from the moment you walked away, you know that. They could have seen you with her and if that’s the case they would know what she means to you.”

So fucking naive. So bloody blind. So fucking stupid.

The tattoo on my abs itches and I want to scratch the fucking thing off. The brand I can never get rid of, the curse that made me what I am, I used to wear with pride. Now? It just marks me as Satan in disguise, and I repulse even myself.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” I panic, needing to release the agony building inside me. She’s in their hands and it’s my fault. If I can’t function, I won’t be able to get her out. The words from the card taunt me and I pray they don’t mean what I think they do.

The message is inconspicuous, it could mean anything. Except the kennel is where we trained and I’ve only ever lost one thing that’s meant something. Lizzie.

“Why? You still work for them. Why would they take her?” I storm through the house, searching room to room, hoping this is all some big wind-up and Lizzie is hiding somewhere.

“Fuck, mate. I do what I have to because I know I can’t just walk away. They won’t let me. I keep a toe in—I’m not in bloody bed with them,” Bear shouts from behind me.