I settled back against his chest, every nerve in my body on red alert. But Jax was right. A few people turned in our direction, but they only gave us blank, friendly smiles before turning back to their conversations. I relaxed into Jax's chest. He pressed his lips to my neck and then rested his chin on my shoulder.

A bonfire on the beach. It was so… normal that I felt a pang of sorrow for the me that never was. A normal teenager hanging out on the beach with friends, in the arms of a loving, uncomplicated boyfriend.

Jax kissed the place where my neck met my shoulder again and sudden anger welled up in my chest. "Stop," I said, wiggling off his lap.

He looked up at me, confused. I was confused myself. Creeping panic raced up my spine. "What are you doing?" I demanded.

"As far as I can tell, I was kissing your neck," he said.

"Yeah, but why?"

I could see his brow furrow dark shadows in the firelight. "Well, mainly because I like your neck."

I waved at him in frustration. "Do you remember the last time we were at the beach together?"

Jax narrowed his eyes. "Of course I remember," he said sullenly. "What kind of question is that?"

I don't know. I needed to feel the pain again. Pick at the scab that seemed to insist on healing over. "You were so drunk. You told me…"

"I told you how I felt about you. Yeah," he interrupted.

I bit my lip, my anger briefly derailed. The memories were stirring things up inside of me, things I was fighting very hard to keep still. "You did," I said carefully. "You were definitely drunk and I figured…"

He jumped to his feet. "I meant it, Bit. Everything." He ran his fingers through his hair until it stood up in wild tufts I ached to smooth. "Fuck, I still mean it. I didn't stop." He pointed his finger at my chest. "You ran away from me, not the other way around, I'll remind you."

The pain flooded afresh. "Ran away? Is that what you think I did?"

"What the hell else would you call it?"

"Moving on!" I said. I yanked his jacket up over my shoulders and sagged inside of it, then realized what a mistake that was. Everything smelled like him. I shrugged my shoulders, dropping it to the sand. I was instantly freezing, but I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of needing him like I did. "After you so clearly moved on yourself."

His mouth opened and then closed and the light that had been burning in his eyes since the show suddenly snapped back off again. I hadn't even realized it was there until it was gone. "And how is moving on working for you, hmm?" he asked. "You're still here. We're still…" He sank his hands between my legs and I pushed him away, hot, fresh anger bubbling up into my veins.

"I'm here because our parents are getting married, dumbshit!"

He gripped me tighter. "No. Here." He waved his hand to take in the fire, the dark ocean, the sand underneath our toes. "You're here. With me. You've no more moved on than I have. There's no moving on from what we had, Liliana. You're fucking it for me."

I didn't realize I was shaking my head until I spat the word at him. "Bullshit!" I was going to start crying any minute now, and that pissed me off. "How many girls have you fucked since I left, huh? How many before then? You know how many guys I've been with? One." I stabbed him in the chest with my finger. "So how are you going to tell me I'm 'it?’ "

I poked him again, but he swatted me away like a fly. "You've always been it," he said sadly. Then he turned back to the fire.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Jaxson

She stomped off, by the sound of it. I heard her greet Kayla and Harlow, ask them what they were drinking. Standing here by the fire—with my hands shoved into my pockets to keep from punching something—while pretending I didn't want to rush after her and demand to know what the fuck just happened was making me crazy.

"I saw that, dude." I was still trying to hear what Lily was saying, so when Casper appeared by my side, like the pale-ass ghost he was, I nearly jumped out of my skin.

"Fuck. Asshole, I'm going to start making you wear a bell."

He grinned. "I could have probably grabbed the amp stack and done a whole 80s-style solo and you still wouldn't have fucking noticed." His smile faded. "I've never seen you get so worked up about a chick before."

"I'm not worked up." I grimaced, pulling my arm away before he tried to fucking pat me or something. "She's crazy. They're all crazy."

Casper ran his big hand over his bald head. "I used to think that too, before I met Harlow." He shot her a fond look and I followed his gaze.

That was a mistake. Lily was standing next to her, her head thrown back in wild laughter. Harlow said something in her ear that made her spit her drink, then lift her glass in salute. Kayla began shimmying her hips and Lily bounced on her toes as the random guitar player picked up his acoustic and began strumming a familiar tune.

"That's a pretty thing right there," Casper said. He raised his beer in Harlow's direction and she blew him a kiss back. Lily looked at her and then over at us. Her nose wrinkled and she poured another shot down her throat before turning her back to me and starting dancing in a circle, weaving her little body in a manic undulation.

"I see why you like her," chuckled Casper.

"Fuck off," I snarled. I didn't like him seeing her like this. I didn't like anyone seeing this version of Lily—the wild, unhinged version that I thought was only for me.

The three girls whooped as the guitar player stood up and began strolling over to them. I could see the look in his eye, and I didn't fucking like that either. Lily whooped again and raised her shot glass in his direction, downing what number I had lost count. And all of a sudden my feet were moving.

I walked to her side, casually inserting my body between her and the guitarist. She looked confused at what was holding her back from dancing until she saw it was my hand.

"Slow down, Liliana," I hissed. "You can't drink like that."

"How the hell would you know?" she slurred, swaying slightly. "Hey, who the hell are you, anyway?"

"Lily, stop it."

"I know! You're that ‘Cocky’ guy!"

"Shut the fuck up."

"Annie Blue's son, right?"

I gritted my teeth. "Dammit Lily, that's low."

She smirked and weaved in front of me. "Yeah, so's writing a song making fun of your ex."

"What the fuck?"

"Cheers!" She lifted her glass and threw back another shot, then stumbled backwards. I caught her as she sank to the ground.

"Christ, Lily. I don't know what the fuck you're trying here, but it ends now. I'm taking you home."

"Is she going to be okay?" Harlow asked. "You know how to get her home?"

"Yeah," I muttered as I scooped Lily up in my arms. She mumbled something in protest, then her head sagged against my shoulder. "I know where she lives. Hey, do me favor?"

"What do you need?"

"Go grab the car keys from Casper. Tell him I'll drop it back off in the morning.”

"Sure." Harlow tripped lightly across the sand and I was grateful for a moment that my friend had found a good one.

Kayla stood, smiling and swaying. "She's pretty tiny," she observed, like it was some grand fucking revelation.