We’ve reached an impasse. Nova doesn’t know me from Eve, and yet here I am, in a BDSM sex club acting like I’m a college reporter doing an exposé on seedy lifestyles and how it relates to feminism.

Gradually, I get Nova to open up. She takes a steady sip from her drink and keeps her eyes on her lap as she answers.

Fun. Thrills. Self-empowerment. I expected to hear those words, so I ask for more information. I’m hoping she has a good vocabulary.

“All I can say, ma’am, is that there’s nothing like it in the world. I can understand how it’s strange to other women. We hear that we shouldn’t let men treat us like that, and yet it’s so ingrained in our society that it feels perfectly natural, totally safe to do it. Especially with powerful men like the ones here. They can take care of you. They give you an escape from reality. In turn, you give them one too.”

You give them one too?

“How so?”

Nova cocks her head as if I’m the stupidest woman she’s encountered in a long time. “Don’t you see? Women like me are an escape for Doms. We give them everything they want emotionally. They don’t get that outside of places like this, no matter how successful they are at business. Sure, they have a ton of money. Sure, they can have sex with a lot of other women who aren’t into kink, but what does it mean? It’s fun for a while, but it quickly loses its luster. They need more emotion. Maybe not love, but they need to feel like the center of someone’s universe.”

It’s compelling, but it’s not helping any of her points.

“I think I get what you mean,” I say after a few moments of contemplation. For so long I assumed the men in my life – men like my father and Ian – didn’t have to want for anything. Yeah, they had to work. Even we billionaires fucking work to keep things that way. Wanting for things? If a relationship isn’t working, it’s not hard to find a new one. You can move at a drop of the hat. Go on vacation on the other side of the world. Buy the latest gadgets and games and gizmos to keep you amused.

Hell, you can buy whatever sex you want.

Of course, I know that it can feel hollow if you don’t have anyone, such as a lover or other family, to share it with, but I’m a woman. Everything’s tinted by my disadvantages, even in this world. I’ve always assumed men live the high life outside of work.

Perhaps not.

“So what makes it so great for you?” I ask Nova. “What do you gain from a random hookup in a place like this?” Besides free drinks and perhaps a getaway weekend with all expenses paid and a few gifts like designer clothes and a charitable gift into a bank account.

“Well, there’s the sex.”

Thanks, Nova.

“Except it’s not about rough, possessive sex with a guy who looks great and smells good. It’s the release he gives you. I don’t know how else to explain it.”

Nova is losing interest in me. I can tell because there’s some stud in a suit making eyes at her from across the room. Never seen him before. Probably here on business from out of town. Dark hair. Dark eyes. Tanned. The kind of guy you expect to hear a sexy accent from. He nurses a hard drink and won’t remove his gaze from Nova’s curls and tiny, pebble-like nipples poking through her lingerie.

“For the love of God, go get some dick.”

I finish Nova’s drink for her after she leaves, slinking her way to her rich stud of a Dom. I watch them out of the corner of my eye. The guy is staring at her tits and ass, but he’s also listening to her soft words, waiting for permission to touch her, The moment he does, Nova sighs into his gentle embrace, and just like that, these two are paired off for the evening.

That happened faster than junk at regular nightclubs.

Just my luck, I soon see the studly Dom take his new prize to a dark corner, lift her against the wall, pull aside her thong, and start fucking her without a care for who’s watching – like me.

I don’t feel like a perv in places like these. Half the room is covertly watching them, some men leaning in to whisper into women’s ears and vice versa. Some lucky schmuck starts getting a handy-j beneath a table. More than one couple is making out as this party gets going.

Nova is a woman living in ecstasy. She met this guy fifteen minutes ago, but he’s already inside her, thrusting like a maniac between her legs and whispering into her ear. Her fingers curl against the back of his suit, wrinkling it, trying to tear it apart before he can get away from her.

It makes me think about Ian, about the times he slammed me against a wall and had his way with me. Is that what we looked like? Was I that… relenting?

Back then, did I want this from him?

Why do I want it now?

I almost text him and ask him to join me here. Even if we don’t have sex in front of people – which I’m not into – it might be nice to see how he reacts to the people around us, but I don’t text him. I don’t even entertain going over to his place to see if he’s available for cuddles and sex. I know it’s a bad idea when I’m in this state.

There will be plenty of time for that bullshit when I willingly let myself be collared for three whole days, starting Wednesday night.

I guess I’ll find out if I really do understand where women like Nova are coming from.

Chapter 6

IAN

God help me, I’m more excited than a boy leaning how to drive or going to his first rock concert.

More excited than a boy stealing his dad’s car and winging how to drive so he can sneak off to his first rock concert. Not that I know anything about that…

You see, it’s Wednesday. The day Katie is going to put on her collar and not take it off for a whole three days. Her body won’t be the only thing that’s mine. She’ll do anything I command – within reason – learning how to serve as well as submit.

Not just sexually.

Beyond sexually.

As I’ve told you before, I don’t think much about living the BDSM life full time. I know plenty of couples who do that and are very happy. I’ve said before that I think it could be draining and even limiting – from my end. That’s why I think three days is a good limit. Katie can handle three days, and that’s probably about as long as I can handle too.

Fuck I’m excited!

I haven’t seen her all day. She’s working, but she’s taking care of certain matters on the other side of town while I continue to oversee the remodel at The Grand. I won’t see her until after dinner. She’s coming to my place with an overnight bag full of day clothes and a few other things I’ve asked her to bring.

I mailed her the collar, requesting she show up wearing it. Any inhibitions needed to be dealt with before she arrived. And yes, she had a few. During a phone call last night she requested that I give her an hour or two a day to take off her collar and recharge. I was glad she had that kind of foresight. It’s important she take care of herself like that.

It makes me even more excited. You have no idea.

Dinner is take-out again. Valerie joins me in my kitchen, where we discuss her family life and talk briefly about mine. I haven’t told anyone about Kathryn, although I think my assistant suspects it. She’s quick like that.

“That Kathryn Alison sure gives you a run for your money,” she says with a twinkle in her eye. “That kind of woman could be good for you.”

Don’t I know it.

Valerie leaves a half hour before Kathryn is due to arrive. I do some light cleaning, as I always do before my Katie is scheduled to come to me for more than work chat. Far from the first time, and don’t get me wrong… I love dimming the lights, lighting a few scented candles, and straightening up my couch to get ready for some serious boyfriend-girlfriend stuff.