I bring the thin box over and sit next to her on the couch again. Her hand in mind, I give her the trinket I picked out for her.

She studies the box. She knows where it came from.

“Jewelry.” Her quaint voice almost amuses me. “How original.”

“Open it, Katie.”

I feel like she’s humoring me at this point. Nonetheless, when she pops the lid off and sees exactly what I’ve chosen, her throat tightens and her breasts nearly heave out of her corset. “A collar…”

The fear is palpable. I put a gentle hand on the small of her back in the hopes of reassuring her. “I didn’t buy it lightly, Katie. I bought it because we need it.”

It drops into the box. “Do we?”

Tears threaten the corners of her eyes. I kiss her shoulder again, holding her tight in my embrace. “Take a deep breath, love. I wanted to get you a collar not to ‘collar’ you, like you’re thinking, but to help you transition to being a sub. We need a signal. A physical one.”

She looks at me, hopeful, but still doubtful.

I hate seeing her like this. I want my vivacious Katie, the one who is self-assured and not afraid to speak her mind, even if she’s subbing. That’s the point I want to reach with her. I want her to obey during a scene, but I want her to want to obey. There is no joy in it otherwise. She needs to get off on obeying me as much as I get off on telling her what to do.

“You will wear this only when we’re training. That way, when we’re on a normal date, you don’t have to worry I’m going to pull something without your permission… because you’re not wearing the collar. I won’t Dom you unless this collar is around your neck. You get it?”

She fingers the chain between two buffed nails. “Yes. Thank you.”

I’m not expecting that. “For what?”

“For thinking this through. I know you’re not a malicious person, Ian. I wouldn’t be doing this if I thought that about you, but it’s good to know that you understand me to an extent. It makes me… feel better.”

Her tight muscles relax beneath my hand. I rub them, hoping she’ll relax even more. “I’m not going to put this on you yet. We need to discuss a few other things first.” I hold up a glass. “More wine?”

She accepts.

I hold her close to me as I bring up some sensitive, not-so-fun subjects. I want her to feel my warmth, any gentleness I’m able to exude while my thoughts are plagued with how she’s dressed and what I’m going to do to her tonight – and how much hope I have that she’ll love it.

What I hold in my hand now is a contract. We discussed it on the phone a couple of times, but until now I don’t think she ever thought I would present her with an actual Dom/sub contract. The one night I spent writing this up was more somber than I anticipated. I briefly longed for the times when I could pick up a submissive woman who knew what she wanted and loved serving.

We’ll find a way to make this work for now.

There’s not much unique about this contract. It’s simple. When the collar is on, she is subservient to me. She has to do what I tell her, otherwise she will be punished. This is a part of her training. This is meant to help her embrace her submissive state of mind. The only way that can happen is with hard rules.

In return, she’s given me her hard limits over the past few days. No anal. No gagging so she feels powerless to say her safe word. No suffocating. No filming and no recording of any kind. What happens in the room stays in the room – something she should have thought of before telling my mother we’re even seeing each other. Surprised the woman hasn’t shown up here yet, trying to catch us in sordid acts.

The last thing I show her is brand new. Something I only thought of last night.

“I’m giving you two safe words. Pink is still one of them, but that will only tell me that you’re hesitant or getting nervous. I’ll slow down or change course, but I’m not going to stop.”

Her eyes widen.

“If you do want me to completely stop and pause the scene, say Red. Do you understand both words?”

She probably thinks I’m talking to her like a child, but she nods anyway.

I can already see it. Kathryn doesn’t realize she’s exuding it, but everything about her eyes, her body language says submissive. Except it’s not the kind that gets me off. It’s a fearful kind. The kind that does things because she’s afraid, not because she wants what I’m offering.

I have my work cut out for me tonight.

“Are you ready?” I hold up the collar, the chain clinking between my fingers. “Once I put this on, our scene begins. Unless you say your word, it will continue until I decide it’s over.”

Kathryn averts her gaze for a split second, but it’s long enough for me to feel her doubt. My hand clasps on top of hers.

Why won’t you believe me, Katie? Why won’t you believe that I have your best interests in my heart? That I want to make you feel so good that you don’t know where you are anymore? It’s not only about my ego. It’s about yours as well. I want to make you feel like a spoiled princess. I want to hear your voice trill as I give you so much physical and emotional pleasure. I want to make you come so hard that you’re not just begging for me to give you more, but you’re begging yourself to take even more. You know as well as I do that this lifestyle is about completely letting yourself go to your innermost fantasies. You clearly harbor some. As flattered as I am that you’ve chosen me to help you see them through… well…

“Before we do this,” I say, cupping her face in my hands, “I need to hear that you trust me. Unconditionally.”

I kiss her before she can respond. A light kiss. A reminder that I care about her.

She’s smiling, albeit wanly, when I pull my lips away.

“Do you remember how nice it felt last Friday?”

“Of course I do.”

“Whenever you start to feel nervous, think of me from then. That’s the me lurking behind everything I do to you.”

The collar dangles from my hand and rests on her shoulder. She looks at it, then at me.

“I trust you,” she whispers. “I trust you to be patient and give me exactly what I need.”

“I’m not giving you what you need, my sweet.” I loop the collar around her throat, although I don’t latch it yet. “I’m taking you apart and building you back up again. I’m purging your mind of everything you ever thought you knew. When I’m done with you?” The clasp latches, and she gasps, knowing that she’s mine. “You’ll be a whole new Kathryn.”

Her breath stills in her chest.

“You’ll be the Kathryn that you always wanted to be.”

Chapter 10

KATHRYN

I see the change in his eyes.

It happens instantly.

Even though I knew it would happen, I’m still struck by how much Ian Mathers changes when he becomes a Dom.

No, he’s always been a Dom. This whole time we fooled around, flirted, and even fucked without a collar on, he’s been a Dom. Just a Dom who is holding back his true desires… for the sake of my sanity.

None of that matters now.

I shake in my knee-high boots, not because I’m scared, although he probably reads me that way. After the first time we tried this? I don’t blame him at all.

I’m nervous, but I’m not scared.

Truly, I’m excited.

No way do I know what to expect. I don’t know what’s going to happen, how I’ll feel, or if his promises will really come true. But I see this change that pierces me right in the fucking heart and threatens to turn me inside out.

His eyes have gone from kind and tender to…

To…

Consuming.

These are feelings he’s harbored in him this whole time, but I’m only now seeing them. He’s letting me see them, because he’s comfortable with me.