I turned to face him. I had to admit his tone sounded sincere, He raked his hands through his hair and cast his eyes to the ground.

"Look, I don't deserve to have you listen to an apology. I know that. But..."

I stood and watched him stammer for a bit. The presence of him acting like this offered me some small comfort, very small, but I had missed the playful banter between us.

"Can we walk for a minute?" Aiden said. "Just... there's a park over there. It's a nice evening, and I don't expect you to come out with me or anything, but I wanted to explain at least."

I eyed him suspiciously, watching him shuffle his feet and glancing towards me as I thought it over. He looked a bit cowed, more so than I had seen in a while. The fresh air did feel good, and if he had more to say I was curious to hear it. Of course, I didn’t want him to know that.

Not remotely.

"Okay, fine,” I said. "A walk in the park. Sounds great."

We headed to my car to drop off my brief case. I kept my body language distant as we walked along, a solid two feet between us. We crossed the street to the park. I had always wanted to go to it since I had first learned about the park, but it had remained just another luxury that I had put off to focus on work.

The place had large expanses of green slopes, dotted with dogwood trees and maples for shade. Here and there were benches along the edges of the walking paths. Some patches of flower beds decorated the areas. It was easy to get lost in this place, charming and a welcome change from the busy roads outside the courthouse.

"I've been tearing myself apart about how I spoke to you the other night,” he began. "I can't tell you how sorry I’m for the things that I said. I don't blame you at all for being upset with me. But I wanted to tell you that I've decided to go through an outpatient rehabilitation program after the case is over."

"Do you mean it?" I said, still unsure.

"Yeah," he said. "When I realized that you had found out about it, I was embarrassed. I didn't want to lose you, and now I think I fucking have. At first I thought about quitting to get you back, but after what happened the other night I finally came to the conclusion that I need to do this for myself."

The lampposts began to wink their lights on as the evening fell, casting a golden glow over the pedestrians. I felt as if Aiden were telling the truth, but I still didn’t feel ready to forgive him just yet. I couldn’t condemn him completely though.

His intentions seemed honest at least.

I felt badly for how we had left things and I didn’t want him to think that I judged him. I hadn’t thought about it in a long time, but I had my own story to tell as well. I only had to think about it for a few moments.

"Aiden, I want to tell you something,” I began. "Do you remember the boyfriend I mentioned that I had in college?"

"Yeah. I think so," he said. "Didn't you break up with him because he claimed you never spent enough time with him?"

"Well, that's what I told you,” I said. "But that's not exactly what happened."

"Oh?" he asked.

"When I was in school, I felt like I was under a great deal of pressure,” I began. "I had always been an honor roll student, and when I couldn't keep up I started to crumble a little bit. Then I met Alex, and he kind of pulled me out of it."

"Your college boyfriend?" he asked.

"Yes," I said. "He was a lot of fun at first. He really helped me to let go. To ease up and not take things so seriously all the time. I guess that was one good thing I got from that relationship."

"You mean the Blair that we know today is 'relaxed Blair'?" he said with a smirk.

"Actually yes," I said with a challenging glare. "But the point is, Aiden that I have some idea of what you’re going through. One of the things that happened during that time is that I started smoking marijuana. Alex got me started on it, saying that not only would it help me focus, but it would bring us closer."

He didn’t answer right away but just looked at me as if seeing something new. I continued.

"We did that for several months, and at first I only did it every once in a while. Weekends mostly to wind down from school. Things like that. But then it slowly started to take over. Before I knew it I was getting high all the time. When I got my mid-year grades I realized I needed to stop. I had dropped a whole letter in nearly all my classes. I stopped immediately because I found that I no longer cared. I had worked hard for what I had and I didn't want it to slip away because I couldn't handle my stress. I tried time and time again to talk to Alex about it, but he kept pushing me. We spent less time together, which gave me time to devote to my studies. I knew I had to make a decision one way or another. I still cared about him so I decided to go over to his apartment and talk to him about how I was feeling. I wanted to see if we could work things out if he would stop the drugs also. But..." my voice trailed off wondering how much more I should tell Aiden.

"But what?" he pressed.

"When I arrived I noticed a car in the driveway that I had never seen before. I had been over enough times to know what his roommates drove, and I was pretty sure that none of them had a pair of purple fuzzy dice hanging from the rear view mirror. I opened the door and went in without knocking. No one else was home. But I found him in bed with another girl."

"Fuzzy dice girl?"

"Yep."

"Wow."

"I wanted nothing more than to lose myself in the fuzzy haze of getting high. Like I said, it really did make me feel better. But I pushed through and focused on my books. That was probably the hardest thing I ever had to do. My grades came back up almost instantly, and that's when I decided that I didn't want to pursue dating any more. I became the hardnosed, driven professional I am now."

"I see."

"My point is, Aiden, that you don't need them. You breezed through high school barely lifting a finger. You had to have been top of your class in school otherwise you would never have been selected for this position. I'm really proud of what you’re doing. I want to be there for you."

"So you forgive me?" he said, giving me a look that rival a puppy dog.

I gave him a side long glance and finally grinned. "Sure," I said, nudging his arm with my elbow.

He looked at me for a long moment with a look of speculation on his face.

"What?" I asked starting to feel self-conscious.

"I'm glad you told me that,” he said quietly.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yeah, I always had this image of you as this perfect role model type. I know in high school you were the most driven person I had ever met."

"You want to get something to eat?" I suggested, wanting to change the subject.

"If we can stay in,” he answered. "I'm not up for another night out."

"Yeah," I said. "That sounds fine. Let's go to my place since it's closer."

"That sounds great,” he said with a grin.

We walked slowly back to the car, still enjoying the last remnants of twilight. The Pacific breeze had cooled the evening, but the last few pockets of the day's heat still lingered. We picked up some burgers and fries at a nearby drive-though and headed back to my apartment. Kelsey was out, having left a note that she was over at Blake's for the evening. I had no idea if that meant she would be back tonight or in the morning.

"It seems we have the place to ourselves,” I said with a sly grin. He met my smile, but lowered his eyes rubbing the back of his head. "Maybe we could watch a movie or something,” I suggested sensing his hesitation.