My wall of muscle is now gone. I’m forced to see my new environment and the inhabitants of the room. The men I’ve been sent here to seduce and spy on. I look at all of the other women in the room. They appear happy. They seem to be enjoying themselves. Nobody’s being forced to do stuff against their will.
“Boys,” Dozer hollers. “Meet Pumpkin.”
Heads turn. I’ve instantly become the center of attention. Like a heat wave, their stares hit me and I feel hot all over. Uncomfortable in my skin. I wave weakly, and then scold myself for not showing more confidence.
Comments ring out, but they’re said so fast and coming from all directions that I’m not sure who’s saying them. At least not at first.
“Hot damn. Dozer’s got himself a ginger snack.”
“Fresh fuckin’ pussy.”
“Amen, brother.”
“You bring me cherry pie for dessert, Lil?”
“I call dibs.”
“Looks to me like dibs have already been called, asshat.”
“Mav’s going to go ballistic. She looks just like—ouffph.” This part is said by the handsome blond biker with the nice smile at the pool table. The blond snaps at the biker next to him, “Fuck, man! What the fuck was that for?”
His friend replies, “Because Mav hears you say her name, and he’s gonna rearrange your fuckin’ face, dipshit. That’s a no go. Don’t go gettin’ your heart set on tasting that treat. There’s no fuckin’ way he’s lettin’ her stick around.”
Blondie replies, “That bastard needs to get his fuckin’ head checked. That is sweet-ass tail right there. I don’t give a fuck what he says. We’re not turnin’ that shit out.”
I put on a mask of indifference, but inside the revulsion is churning in my gut. I’m nothing but a fresh piece of meat in a room full of carnivores.
Dozer leans down and breathes into my ear. “If you think this is bad, you’re not gonna be able to cope when it gets real wild. This ain’t shit.”
“It’s fine. I’m fine,” I say.
“You sure? Because these men aren’t good or patient or kind.” Dozer’s words tickle my neck. “They’re dirty, crude fuckers; and once you’re considered HOC property, they’ll demand everything from you. Your respect, your time, your body. Your sweat and blood.” His voice deepens and rumbles. “Doesn’t mean you won’t get back somethin’ in return, but we don’t make any promises. If you’re here, you’re here for us. No bullshit. No drama. You do what we say, when we say. Doesn’t matter what it is. You follow our rules or you’re out. Simple as that.”
He pulls my chin up, so I’m peering into his face. The nice Dozer I met a moment ago is gone. A terrifying mammoth in leather stares back at me. “You feel me?” His tone is deliberately harsh. His face stern and serious.
Message received loud and clear.
“Yes.”
“If you got any doubts, now’s the time to listen to them and leave. Because I’m not about to stick my neck out for you, to have you turn and run when shit gets crazy. Makes me look bad.”
This is it. My last chance to leave before things get real. I quickly weigh my options one last time. Davis or the club. Prison or Freedom. Handcuffs, imprisonment, and Warner, or staying here in a clubhouse full of bikers, which possibly means I’ll have to give them a bit of myself until I can find a way out of here without being scooped up by Davis.
I can’t live locked in a tiny space for who knows how long and depend on someone else’s mercy. I won’t give up that kind of power over my life again. The thought alone causes my hands to shake and makes my skin crawl as if a thousand tiny ants are doing a rain dance across me.
This place allows me some freedom, and it buys me time to figure out what to do next. It’s temporary.
With my mind made up, I tell Dozer, “I can do this. I want to. If you do, you won’t regret helping me. I’m a hard worker. I’ll pull my weight. Cook. Clean. Do whatever the club needs me to do.”
A wide smile flashes over Dozers face. The flirty Dozer is back. His other hand squeezes my hip. “Good answer, babe.” He lets go of my chin and turns to Goose and Lily. “All right. I’ll go to bat for her. But I’m tellin’ you right now, Rick the Dick is gonna blow a fuckin’ gasket when he sees her. Bodie’s right, she looks like her. This ain’t gonna be easy.”
Goose smiles and pat’s Dozer on the back. “Well, if anyone is gonna light his fuse, it should be you.”
Dozer lets out a loud guffaw and shakes his head. “I guess it’s about time he deals with his shit, yeah? We’ve let him stew about it for too damn long. Fuck. I was hopin’ I wouldn’t have to be the one to do it.”
Lily speaks up. “There’s something you should know, D, before you go in there.”
He kicks his chin up. “Yeah? What’s that?”
Lily leaves Goose’s side and sidles up to Dozer. She rises up on the tips of her toes to whisper in his ear. In no time, Dozer’s eyes dart rapidly to me, and lock on my face. They become heated as a lazy grin spreads across his mouth.
My brows pinch together. What in the world is she saying?
As Lily backs away, Dozer says, “Like I said. Not likin’ this idea that she’s a gift for Edge, but you’re right, Bird. He might just go for it. Fuckin’ scary how your woman’s mind works, G.”
Goose throws his arm around Lily’s shoulders and pulls her against his body. A show of possession if I ever saw one. “Don’t I fuckin’ know it? This woman plays me like a fuckin’ fiddle.”
Dozer’s solid arm curls over my shoulders. He tucks my body into his side. He’s so big and his arm so heavy, I feel like I’m being pinned down by a colossal boulder.
“Come on, babe. Let’s go piss off the gatekeeper, yeah?”
Then he rasps in my ear, “Do me a favor and ignore everything I say from here on out until I tell you otherwise.”
Together we cross the room. But Dozer addresses the bikers at the bar as we pass. “Looks like Lil’ Bird found Edge a nice ripe cherry. I don’t know about you boys, but I’m not sendin’ this sweet thing away. At least not ’til I’ve had a taste for myself. It’s about time we got some new flavors around here.”
Approvals ring out.
An older red-haired biker with a long red beard pats Dozer on the back. He reminds me of the lead guitarist for ZZ Top. “You give him hell, D. Tell him we’re sick of being on pussy lockdown. You need us, holler. We always got your back.”
Dozer walks us down a hallway. He takes me to the third door on the right. Before he knocks, he looks down at me. There’s an apologetic look in his eyes, “Gotta warn ya, babe. This isn’t gonna be pretty. I’ll handle it though, okay?”
I nod as my insides knot up. Honestly, how much uglier can this day possibly get?
There is beauty in a broken heart, and undeniable allure to a damaged soul. And in an instant, our ideals of perfection are both shredded and rebuilt.
I wipe my sweaty palms feverishly on my shorts then tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear.
Breathe, Em, breathe. It’s going to be fine.
Dozer raps three times on the door.
A whiskey rough voice with a bit of an accent snarls, “I swear to God, if you fuckers don’t leave me alone so I can get some work done today, I’m gonna ram someone’s head through the goddamn wall.”
Dozer’s arm tightens around me. “It’s okay, babe, he’s always like that. Got a perpetual stick up his ass. He’s gonna freak the fuck out. That’s inevitable, but I’ll talk him down, yeah?”
I nod and tell myself that no matter what, I will not open my mouth. I won’t let this guy get to me. I need to be prepared. He’s going to be a dick . . . that’s a given. Biting the inside of my cheek, I inwardly scold . . . don’t let your temper get the best of you. Or you can kiss your freedom goodbye.
Dozer removes his arm from around me, opens the door, and sticks his head in. “Mav, I need a word.”