Griz slaps my back, bringing me back to the present. “You sure you wanna chill here? Should be a pretty fuckin’ entertainin’ night. Bodie’s half spent. And Taz has already threatened to deck his ass more than once.”

I pull in a drag on my smoke then blow it out away from him. “Nah. Got shit to do. Tell Bethany I’ll be out to check on her soon though.”

Griz mounts his brown and orange Road King Classic and salutes me. “Will do, brotha.”

With Hodge gone, Cap out of commission, and Dozer having a stick up his ass when it comes to her, it falls to me to make sure Bethany’s taken care of.

She’s been struggling since Hodge passed, trying to run the bar while raising their two kids, Axel and Medda. It wouldn’t be a problem, except she won’t let the club help, whether it be money, or the old ladies helping with the kids. She refuses to be treated like a charity case. For some reason, she thinks with Hodge gone she’s no longer family. However, she should know better. We also owe it to our fallen brother to take care of his wife and kids.

So besides making sure we visit often and give her our business, I do my best to help her where I can. With the kids. Slip money into her purse now and then, and pay the past due rent on the bar’s lease whenever I can talk her into letting me.

When I’m done with my cigarette, I head back into the clubhouse.

Four feet in, I’m stopped by Star who walks up to me and places her hand on my chest. I scowl down at her offending hand until she says, “Sorry, I forgot,” and rapidly removes it.

“I saw that you were stayin’ and thought maybe you’d want some company.”

I’m about to push Star to the side, when I catch Doll peeking over at me. She tries to hide behind her waterfall of crimson waves as she wipes down the bar; cleaning up after the dinner she made everyone. The dinner, where with every bite I took, I thought . . . If she keeps cooking like this . . . there’s no way in hell the boys will be on board with me kicking her out when her time’s up. It’s not only the food they love. While serving us, she kept bending forward over the bar, giving all the brothers a perfect view of her ample tits in her tight, black shirt. Bastards are already fucking drooling all over her. They can’t wait to get their hands on her.

“Mav?” Star’s voice draws my attention back to her.

“Not—” tonight.

Dozer sits down in front of Doll and she graces him with a welcoming smile. My insides twist. Dozer’s never once paid this much attention to a girl. Well, besides Bethany. It makes me wonder if he’s thinking about making her more than just another clubpiece.

I watch them flirt with each other. The only thing that accomplishes is now I’m daydreaming about laying a brother out. Or breaking something.

Jesus! You’re jealous . . .

I shake my head trying to clear it.

My cock nearly felt the warmth of her mouth and I’ve had fucking blue balls ever since. Clearly, it’s just been a while since I had sex. Too long. That’s all it is. Far past the time I usually use a clubpiece to take the edge off. Without thinking too much about it, I grab Star’s hand and drag her toward my office. She giggles and I look back to see her waving at Doll.

Doll’s standing there staring at me while she’s holding a pile of dirty dishes in her arms. But I note with satisfaction that her smile’s gone.

I ignore the instinct I have riding me that tells me to toss this blonde aside, and grab the girl I really want in my bed.

But fuck, don’t I know that would be a mistake.

I don’t close the door after pulling Star inside my office. Why should I? I’ve never cared about taking my pleasure somewhere private before now. Except with Dana, only she preferred to do things out in the open. Which worked fine, since that’s how shit works around here.

Star rubs my arm.

“Don’t touch me. Lose the skirt,” I command.

She quickly follows my instructions. She’s been around long enough to know how I am and what I like.

I yank my top-drawer open and pull out a condom. After ripping the package, I unlatch my belt, unzip, and pull my cock out. I stroke myself a couple of times before I cover myself to the hilt. I know exactly where Star’s been and if we didn’t get all the girls tested as often as we do, and pumped full of birth control, there’s no fucking way I’d go anywhere near her.

Thank God for the good Dr. Alister.

Star walks to me. She lifts her hands to touch me. I instantly feel like my skin’s crawling. She keeps trying to touch me and I grind my teeth to hold in the irritation circling inside me.

I spin her and push her forward over my desk.

In a split second, I’m behind her, grabbing her hips. I line up and, without warning, slam into her.

Star cries out, but it’s fake as hell. She needs no prepping, no stretching. The notion has my stomach revolting and my dick threatens to soften. But I fight it.

I growl, “Hands.”

Star crosses her arms behind her back. I hold her crossed wrists with one hand, and reach around her to grab her throat with my other hand. I don’t choke her hard enough to leave a mark, but enough that it gives me what I need.

I imagine it’s Dana. I take her roughly and don’t let up. And all the while, I revel in the sounds Star’s making. Small pleas. “I’m sorry.” She’s been coached to do what I like, but tonight it’s not working. Slowly this kind of sex has lost its luster. It’s dull and no longer lights a fire inside of me. When she says “Maverick,” it sounds all wrong. And it yet again throws me off.

“Don’t talk. Just take it.”

She doesn’t speak again. And the only sound is our grunts filling the room.

I don’t know how much time has passed, maybe ten minutes, twenty, but I feel her approaching. Doll and Dozer walk by my door. Her aqua irises land on me. That zing I feel when our eyes connect hits me like a battering ram and heat infuses my hard-on, spreads like a brush fire through my body. I close my eyes and throw my head back. Images of Doll, not Dana, barrel through my mind. My hand cupping her angelic face. My thumb rubbing over her dotted cheek as her luscious lips wrap around me. Lastly, her crimson strands tangled around my fist. Groaning out, I pump my release into the condom.

All of the darkness that constantly fills me instantly leaves my body. For a few seconds, an intoxicating sort of bliss cools my chest. My mind clears, and my limbs slacken.

All from a look. One. Fucking. Look.

Christ.

What in the fuck would happen if I lived through what I just imagined? If I had the real thing in my arms? Next to my body? In my bed?

Talk about total mind fuck.

My cock hardens as if I didn’t just dump a truckload of cum into this bitch. It’s ready to go again. Only it wants nothing to do with the clubpiece in front of me. It wants the girl who, with a simple glance, can hijack my body and mind. The one who just watched me fuck Star.

Fuck. I’m one sick fucking bastard.

Guilt hits me, makes my heart heavy. I rub my hands over my face. What’s happening to me?

I pull out of Star and discard the condom, toss it in the trash. After tucking my cock away and zipping up, I slap Star on her ass. “Get dressed.”

Star grabs her skirt off the floor and slips it on.

I escort her out of my office, but when I turn to go to my room, she stops me by latching on and pulling on my wrist. Clenching my teeth together, I pull my arm from her grip.

“We could go again. Make a night of it. Just you and me. You’re still hard.” She gestures to the hard-on I’m sporting. The one that’s not for her. For a second, I consider it. I could use her until we’re both raw. I could exhaust myself inside Star and attempt to purge Doll from my mind. If only for a night.

But when I look at Star and really see her, her pale skin, her bleached blonde hair, and fake tits, I know that’s not possible. And why would I waste the time and energy fucking a girl that doesn’t have the ability to make me come?