He had always hated runners. Declan could deal with brats, fighters, weepy women—hell, even whiners. But runners were too much damn trouble. Hard to catch. Then once you caught them, you’d have to bring them out of hiding. Charlotte was in this group. She hid behind her nerd girl image, but she was something special when she let that guard of hers down. And when she flashed a glimpse of what was really inside her, it did something to him.

But so far that’s all she’d given Declan; glimpses. There had been moments when he thought they would make a complete breakthrough and she would come out of hiding for good. He could see it on her face, but then it disappeared just as quickly.

I can go slow. If she needs to see self-control, I can show it to her. Fuck, I don’t think I can slow down much more. But it isn’t working. She still has one foot out the door. What the fuck?

Declan would give her up if he thought he could or if she didn’t respond to him. But that’s the thing, she submitted without even realizing it. She had no idea she was doing it, and it was the most beautiful fucking thing he’d ever seen. And that’s why he ’couldn’t let her go.

His cock twitched as a brief image flickered through his mind. The image of Charlotte sucking him off in the car before work Friday came into sharp focus. Thoughts drifted to the feel of her sweet pussy milking his cock dry after their session last night. God, she’s so perfect.

He’d only been away from her thirty minutes and already he was craving her. It was like quitting smoking.

Fuck, it’s going to be a long few days. Why the fuck am I going to Owen’s cousin’s place?

Declan knew the answer. He needed to give Charlotte the chance to run. Until she stopped hiding, the only way to know if she was being true to herself was to give her the opportunity to get away. If this situation is wrong for her, she won’t be able to keep herself from running. But it’s not wrong. It’s so right; it scares the shit out of me.

***

Halfway through his Monday, Declan caved and called Charlotte. It didn’t matter that it went to voicemail. He had to hear her voice. Something about it calmed him.

He considered blowing off Owen’s invitation to the munch Monday night, but in the end he made himself go. If for no other reason than to talk to Owen and get his take on things. It couldn’t hurt. There were five cars in front of Owen’s uncle’s house. Declan recognized hers right away. He tried not to cringe.

Declan walked up to the house and greeted Becker first. Becker was Owen’s cousin. Becker was his last name, and Declan had no idea what his first name was. That was something you adjusted to in the lifestyle with most people. Nicknames or last names only. For people who relied on building trust in their partner, they were an untrusting group. Declan knew of a couple who had been play partners for over a year before they knew each other’s given names.

He had no idea how involved in the lifestyle Becker was or had been. Right now, he was just a loner who lived in an old farmhouse in the country. His wife had passed away five years ago. As far as they could tell, Becker hadn’t dipped his toes back into the dating pool since. It seemed like a waste because he was a great guy.

“Hey, Becker. How’s things?”

“Pearse, hey. Things are good. Owen and everyone are out that way.” He pointed toward the west. “Better light this time of day.”

“You joining us?”

“Nah. My shoulder has been bothering me lately. I need to take a break.” Becker rubbed his right shoulder, wincing a bit.

“Caught yourself a girl, yet?”

“All the time. Catch and release.”

Declan nodded. Becker had been saying the same thing for as long as he knew him, which was going on four years. He figured it was Becker’s way of politely telling him to fucking mind his own business.

He walked through the side door and spotted the group. A moment later, he heard Owen’s whip crack. Declan knew it was his by the loudness of it. They were the only ones in their circle who invested serious money in their implements. They both had handcrafted French Martinet twelve plait whips made from Latigo leather that tapered to thin crackers at the end, producing a wicked sound. The other regulars sported mostly shorter stock whips or synthetics. They worked well but weren’t nearly as impressive sounding.

Declan tried not to notice Katherine as he approached, but she was like an old bad habit. Every once in a while your eyes are bound to shop even when it’s not what you want anymore. She was most definitely not what he wanted. Unfortunately, she caught him looking in her direction. Fuck!

He stopped and stood a comfortable distance from where she was standing, focusing his full attention on Owen. He was explaining something to Ford about timing, which was so critical to the more advance cracks. Declan ’guessed he’d arrived at the end of his mini lesson because the other guys who’d been listening were starting to palm their whips and spread out. He created his space and started his warm-up routine.

About ten minutes later, Declan spotted Owen out of the corner of his eye making his way toward him. He coiled his whip in one hand and turned to face Owen.

“Hey, glad you could make it.”

Declan nodded.

“Where’s Charlotte?”

“She’s out of town. Family issue.”

Owen nodded. “You been seeing her a lot?”

“Yeah. We spent the weekend together, actually.”

“That’s great, man.” Owen was one of the few people who knew him well enough to know he didn’t date anyone regularly. “How’s it working out?”

Declan shrugged. “Slow. She’s, uh, complicated.”

“Isn’t everyone?”

He chuckled. “Yeah, I guess. She’s just harder for me to figure out.”

“How come?”

“She’s been beaten down pretty good by someone in her past. I don’t think she’s ever dealt with it properly.”

“That sucks.”

“I’m not getting through to her. Not yet, anyway. She acts like she’s going to let go and then … doesn’t. I don’t know.”

“Sexually or mentally?”

“Oh, she can come. And that’s just getting better. But emotionally she’s got one foot out the door like she’s just waiting for the signal to run. That’s why I’m trying to not be so intense.”

“Maybe that’s the problem.”

“What do you mean?”

“Maybe you shouldn’t take it slow. Has she given you any clear signs of being frightened of going further?”

“No. Nervous.”

“Of course. She doesn’t know what to expect. Does she ask questions?”

“All the time.”

“There’s your answer. She’s curious. She wants more.”

“But what if she can’t handle it and she runs?”

“Then I guess you better tie her down and do your job. You know the drill.”

“I’ve just never had this particular issue before.”

Declan caught a glimpse of Katherine moving up on his flank and dropped the conversation.

“Hey, guys. Declan, can I talk to you for a minute?”

He felt his stomach churn. “Yeah, sure.” He looked over at Owen. He waved as he turned toward the group. “What do you want, Katherine?”

“You don’t have to sound so hostile, do you?”

“Where’s Tony?”

“He’s, uh, I don’t know. Out, I think. That’s not really working out.”

Why am I not surprised? “I came here to practice, not socialize. Is there something you want to say?”

“Well, kind of, but not like this. Can we talk back at your place?”

“Not tonight.”

“Tomorrow night, then?”

“What is there to talk about?”

“I, there are some things I want to say. About what happened and the sort of place I was in when we broke up.”

“Katherine, save it. I don’t want to rehash the past.”

“No, me neither. I just need to say some things, okay? And then you can do whatever you want with me.”