Neither of them went away. So she just sat there and continued to pet Luna.
These were your decisions. You cannot go back and change things. This is how it is. How it is going to be.
Deal with it.
And deal with it she would…just as soon as she got off the floor.
* * *
The ohhhs and awes that emanated from the circle of women around Harper were beginning to get to her. But really what else did she expect? She was at a joint baby shower for two of her friends.
About thirty women were stuffed into the front room of Café Lula, munching on finger foods and drinking punch. The little eatery, with its variety of bright colors scattered about here and there, was closed on Sundays, so the party had free rein.
Harper closed her eyes and took a deep, fortifying breath when another round of awes resonated around the circle. It turned out to not be the best idea as her mother—who was currently sitting next to her—bit into an egg salad sandwich.
Eggs were currently enemy number one on Harper’s not-so-friendly food list. The smell. The taste. The general thought of them. But as her mother was currently on her not-so-friendly in general list, she wasn’t too shocked.
Delilah Laurence didn’t always think before she spoke…or before she acted. And yes, Harper completely and entirely understood that mothers could be critical of their children—daughters especially—but Delilah took it to a whole other level.
She hadn’t held back any of the jabs of late. But she never held back. Ever.
Harper hadn’t even been at the shower five minutes when Delilah had cornered her and started in. As she hadn’t really been eating the last couple of weeks, and her appetite had been pretty limited even before the morning sickness had kicked in, she’d lost a few pounds. The dress she’d picked out for that afternoon was a size smaller than she’d been wearing, and one that she hadn’t fit into for a couple of years.
“I might not agree with this breakup of yours,” her mother had said, giving Harper the ever-critical Delilah once-over. “But it does have its benefits. You look skinnier.”
Wellllll, that was all about to change now, wasn’t it?
No sooner had the jab from earlier crossed Harper’s mind, when her mother leaned over and whispered, “It’s a good thing you have so many friends with children, now you won’t feel like you’re missing out.”
Yup. Delilah was in for a surprise. Harper wondered if she could just wait until after the baby was born, and have the baby tell her mother the news.
Guess what? You’re a grandmother!
Yeah, probably not.
Well, at least part of Delilah’s statement was true. Hannah Shepherd and Paige King were both very much pregnant. Hannah was due in mid-October, Paige toward the end of September. Though the odds that Paige lasted that long were a little slim because she was carrying twin girls, her baby bump was quite a bit bigger than Hannah’s.
The stack of baby supplies on either side of the women was growing considerably. As Hannah was having a little boy, hers was dominantly green and blue. Paige’s was filled with pinks and yellows.
Paige and her husband Brendan already had a little boy, Trevor, who’d just turned two last month. He was currently helping his mother rip the paper off of her gifts and giving Hannah assistance with her presents as well.
Paige and Hannah had quickly become two of Harper’s closest friends when they moved to Mirabelle, but the positions of best friends were and would always be reserved by Grace King—now Grace Anderson—and Melanie O’Bryan—now Melanie Hart. Grace and Mel had known each other pretty much since birth. When they’d met Harper on the first day of sixth grade almost fifteen years ago, she’d been quickly added to the fold.
Neither of them knew what was currently going on with Harper. Not talking to them about it over the last few weeks had been nothing short of painful. But Harper couldn’t talk about it. She wasn’t ready yet. Because if she said the words to someone else, everything would be really real.
Oh look, there was that denial again.
But her denial wasn’t the only reason she wasn’t talking. No, the other part was the jealously that she just couldn’t get over, and the subsequent guilt that accompanied said jealousy.
Grace and her husband Jax had welcomed their daughter Rosie Mae into the world last September, and Mel and Bennett were now embarking on starting a family of their own. They were in the trying phase and enjoying every aspect of it.
Harper was happy for them, really she was.
It was just hard.
How could it not be? She was single…alone…and now very much pregnant. While all of her closest friends were married to men who loved them. Men who adored them. Men who would move mountains for them.
None of them was doing it alone.
At that exact moment someone who immediately had Harper amending her previous statement filled the empty seat to her right.
Almost all of her friends were married to men who loved them and weren’t raising children all by themselves. Beth Boone was the exception. And her situation was way more complicated than Harper’s would ever be.
Beth had been a couple of years ahead of Harper, Grace, and Mel when they were in high school and they’d all been friends. When Beth had graduated, she went up to Tallahassee for college. She and Mel had been roommates for a couple of years when their time in school overlapped, and they were incredibly close.
For more than a decade, Beth’s older sister and brother-in-law—Colleen and Kevin Ross—had been next-door neighbors to Mel’s parents. Mel’s little brother, Hamilton, was best friends with the Rosses’ oldest daughter, Nora. The two kids had grown up together, running back and forth across the front yard.
Two months ago, Kevin and Colleen had died in a car accident. They’d both been killed on impact. Beth moved back to Mirabelle and was now the sole guardian and new parent to her sister’s three kids: Nora, sixteen; Grant, seven; and Penny, three.
How was that for some perspective?
Penny was currently curled up in Beth’s lap, her little head resting on Beth’s shoulder while she sucked her thumb and observed the room through her wide, mossy green eyes. The pair could easily be mistaken as mother and daughter as they both had the exact same shade of blond hair, though Beth’s eyes were a light blue.
“Would you judge me if I packed up some of that food over there and took it home in to-go containers?” Beth whispered conspiratorially. “Cucumber sandwiches and raw vegetables are an acceptable dinner for three children, right?”
The circumstances sucked for Beth returning to Mirabelle, but Harper truly had missed her friend.
“I mean I wouldn’t.” Harper shook her head. “But there’s no guarantees to some of the other guests.”
“What are you talking about?” Beth gasped in mock shock. “No one here has a single judgmental bone in their bodies.”
Penny pulled her thumb out of her mouth and stretched up to Beth’s ear. Harper could just make out the word potty in Penny’s little voice.
“I’ll be right back. Don’t let anyone take my seat.”
Harper nodded, and as she watched them walk away she couldn’t help but be in awe of her friend. Beth had been thrown into the deep end and she was handling things remarkably well. In the scheme of things, Harper was treading water in the shallow end.
Barely keeping her head up from drowning.
And as if on cue, like she sensed the moment to strike, Delilah leaned over and said, “It’s a shame things didn’t work out with Brad; you would’ve made beautiful babies. Though hopefully they would’ve had his metabolism.”
Harper was getting to the point where she didn’t visibly cringe when Brad’s name was said. They were now starting in on month five of him being gone, and it was no secret to anyone that Delilah partially blamed Harper for the demise of the relationship. It was also no secret that Delilah was still holding out hope that he’d come back.