Xavier sat on the bed next to me, picking me up and cradling me to his chest with one hand, while the other massaged my arms, helping to alleviate the discomfort.

We were silent until Ghost was out of the room with a dead-to-the-world Spencer.

“We need to get you cleaned up,” Xavier murmured against my hair. “I’m going to take you home.”

“No.” I clung to his shirt in desperation. “Sophie can’t see me like this.”

He looked at me thoughtfully for several moments. “Okay. Come on.”

With one arm around my back and the other under my knees, he carried me out of the house and to an Escalade that was waiting there. It was past dawn, and I squinted at the blinding sun as he set me gently in the backseat. He grabbed a napkin from the glove box that he pressed to the cut on my throat. Then he leaned over the back seat to dig around for a blanket. Even though it was hot as hell outside right then, I was grateful when he found one and draped it over my still-naked body.

Before shutting the door, Xavier leaned into me, both hands on either side of my head as he studied my face. I knew he was beating himself up over this. I could see why he would, but I didn’t want him blaming himself. He had warned me about Spencer, and I knew the inherent dangers of having a relationship with a man like him.

“It’s not your fault,” I whispered.

His index finger trailed lightly over the cut on my neck and what I assumed was an imprint left by Spencer’s hand. “Isn’t it?” he asked, his eyes tracking the movement of his finger.

“It’s not,” I said adamantly. “It’s that sick fuck’s fault.”

“We’ll talk about it later.” He placed a gentle kiss on my swollen cheek and shut the door, effectively cutting off any protest I might have had.

Xavier drove us into the underground parking garage of The Den and parked in his reserved spot. The drive there had been silent. I was quiet because my brain was still trying to process everything. I presumed Xavier was quiet because he was alternately beating himself up over the events that took place and attempting to reign in his urge to kill something.

My fingers held the blanket tighter to me when he lifted me from the back of the SUV and set me on my feet in front of a locked door. With an arm around my waist, he hustled me through it and down a tunnel, at the end of which there was another door that he unlocked and held open for me. I walked through with him right behind me and stopped, unsure of where to go.

“That door.” He pointed to the one in front of where we stood and I opened it to see I was in a suite much like the girls’ rooms, but more manly.

“What is this place?” I asked him while he flipped on the light in the bathroom and took a towel out of a white cabinet.

“It’s where I sometimes stay instead of going home. You got clothes in your room?” I nodded and he stood in the doorway of the bathroom and continued. “I’ll have someone bring you some clothes and help you take a shower.”

When he didn’t come near me but instead went to leave the room, I stopped him. “Why can’t you help me?”

“Because I have to get someone to get your clothes and then I have to find Ghost and Spencer.” He spit out his name as if it tasted like garbage. Which I had to admit it sort of did.

“Are you going to hurt him?” Deep down I knew the answer to that question, but I needed to hear it from him.

The perverse and sinister look that crossed his face had my fingers spasming where they gripped the blanket. “I’m going to do more than hurt him.”

“Honey,” I whispered but didn’t say any more when he was suddenly in front of me and all I could do was blink at how fast he moved.

When his hands settled around my face, holding me with possessiveness, my heart settled for the first time since Spencer had taken me. “No one should ever dare to take what’s mine from my own fucking house. No one threatens to do vile things to what’s mine. And no one fucking hurts what’s mine. All those things happened tonight, and right now I’m doing my best to keep a leash on my temper, baby. He won’t just hurt. He will bleed and beg for my mercy, and when I’m done, I’m going to find Lucien Spinelli and do the same things to him.”

The feral look in his eyes at the thought of exacting revenge on my behalf had me conflicted. On one hand, I wanted nothing more than to have him avenge the wrongs done to me, but the thought that he could do something hideous to another human being turned my stomach.

“Who’s Lucien?”

“Spencer’s boss. Now, please, go take a shower and wash his filth from your body. Get dressed and when you’re done, wait for me. I don’t want you leaving this room.”

Even though I wanted him with me, I knew I couldn’t keep him there. He was a man who protected what was his and, when he couldn’t, did what he had to do to make it right.

“Okay,” I whispered, and he dropped his forehead to mine like my acquiescence was the greatest gift imaginable.

I would never ask him to be someone he wasn’t. The question was, could I live with myself if I didn’t?

I was surprised to find Candy sitting on the bed when I walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around my body. While the water and soap had washed away the visible dirt and what was left inside me of Spencer, I still didn’t feel clean.

“Oh God,” she whispered with a horrified look on her face.

My face was a mess. My eye and cheek were bruised from where he’d hit me. There was also a handprint-shaped bruise on my neck along with a small cut from the knife.

I had no idea how I was going to explain things to Ruth and Sophie when I did go home.

“I’m okay,” I assured her even though I wasn’t even sure if it was true.

“Here’s some clothes. I tried to grab something comfortable.” She held up a pair of cotton shorts and a t-shirt for me. “And there is a pair of my flip-flops over there you can have.”

“Thank you.” I went into the bathroom and changed quickly. My nerves were still a mess from everything that had happened along with the knowledge that somewhere in that building Xavier was doing God knows what to Spencer.

“I need to find Xavier,” I announced when I finished.

“Sweetie, I think you should sit here and try to relax.” She patted the bed next to her and gave me a coaxing smile, but I wasn’t to be deterred.

At some point during the last twenty minutes, I had decided that I needed to see for myself what kind of man I was letting into my life. I wasn’t going to be able to turn a blind eye and still be able to sleep at night. It was all or nothing. I had already promised myself to a man who wasn’t what I thought he was. Before I could fully give myself over to Xavier, I needed to see him for who he really was.

“Not going to happen. Do you know where he might have gone?” I didn’t know my way around the place well enough and Candy had been with Xavier the longest. I wasn’t sure how she did, but she knew far more than she ever let on.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” she said in a meaningful tone.

“If you won’t help me, then I’ll tear this place apart until I find them.”

Her eyes assessed me to determine the truth of that statement. They must have determined I was not fucking around when she said, “Fine. I’ll tell you where they probably are, but if anyone asks, you found it all on your own. I want nothing to do with X losing his mind.”

She shivered at the very idea of it before telling me where to go.

I slid my feet into the flip-flops and practically ran out the door.

Two minutes later, I made a mental note to kiss Candy for knowing the code to get through a large metal door that I never would have found on my own. I sprinted through one hall, and then skidded to a halt when I rounded the corner and found Ghost standing guard outside another metal door.