“It’s not that I didn’t like it, or didn’t want what happened, ’cause I did.”

“Then why do you sound so upset?”

“Tess, it’s my job to watch you. I don’t get paid to go down on you.”

His bluntness catches me off guard, and perhaps it does him, too. “Well, you know what I mean,” he adds.

“You were watching me.” I grimace when I hear him laugh. “Not during the act, but when I— What I’m trying to explain is that regardless of what occurred between us, you performed well—”

“I could tell by the way you were screaming.”

Good. Lord. I clear my throat. “What I mean is you swept the apartment for any potential threats—”

“And then yanked off your panties like a teen trying to get laid,” he reminds me.

Curran really has a talent for stopping me in my tracks. Despite my litigation training, I can barely find my voice. “And—and you made sure I was safe—”

“Up until I tossed you on the table and spread your legs wide open.”

Perspiration builds between my breasts. “My point is, you made sure all was well before we, I mean, before you did what you did.”

“How about afterward? Did I make sure all was well after you left me in the elevator? Nope. While I was trying to pull up my pants, some psycho could have come out of your neighbor’s apartment and killed you.”

“That was my fault. You were distracted following the, ah, attention I gave you.”

“And that’s exactly my point. I’m on duty, Tess. This can’t happen again.”

In the silence that follows, I notice how cold my apartment is. As I consider what to say, I wander into my bedroom to check the thermostat. I stop dead when I see the note my father taped beside it.

Contessa,

I think you need reminding who provides you a home to reside in, and all the luxuries that come with it. Your heat has been disconnected. It will remain that way for the rest of the week to give you time to reflect on my generosity and how quickly it can abandon you.

He signed it Donald Newart II.

Damnit. It’s a wonder he didn’t disconnect all my utilities! “Are you saying you don’t want me?” I manage, the hostility directed at my father finding its way to my voice.

“No.” Curran’s tone is absolute. “I’m only saying I can’t have you when I’m on the job.”

Good to know. “What time is your shift over?”

The allure in my voice is clear, and Curran doesn’t hesitate. “A couple of hours.”

I crumple the note with my free hand. “Well then, let’s say in a couple of hours you pay me a visit. It’s cold in my apartment. How would you like to keep me warm?”

Curran

Holy shit.

It’s the same thing I’ve said for the last couple of hours since I disconnected with Tess. I glance at the clock. Fifteen minutes till Lu arrives.

That means seventeen left until I’m back with Tess.

I hit my wipers. Five inches of snow has fallen since I brought Tess home. It’s colder than a banshee’s left nipple, and I’ve walked around the perimeter of the building at least six times. Neither the cold nor the distraction did anything to smother my growing need for her.

I shift in my seat, for all the good it does me.

Christ, I want her. Where the hell’s Lu?

“O’Brien!” Speaking of which, she pounds on the window, causing snow to fall in clumps along the glass. “You ready?”

Am I?

I flip the locks up and she slides into the passenger seat. “Hey, Lu. What’s doing?”

“About five inches of ice, snow, and asshats who can’t drive worth shit. Goddamn Floridians, shouldn’t they be down South instead of schlepping through this crap?” She takes a sip of her coffee. “How’s our girl?”

Excellent. “No issues. No tails. No concerns. She was out for part of the day, but she’s in for the night.”

She takes another gulp. “Good. Her delicate little boobies would probably snap off if she was out in this. When was your last sweep?”

They’re notthatsmall. “Twenty minutes ago. All’s quiet as usual.”

“All right. I’ll do another sweep when you leave.”

I rub my hands. “Yeah, about that…”

She stops before she takes another sip of her coffee and narrows her eyes. I might have my cop face on, but that means nothing to Lu. I may read faces, but she teaches rookies to read them in the academy. Yeah, I don’t stand a chance against Lu’s superpowers.

“You’re not goddamn leaving, are ya, O’Brien?”

I shrug like it doesn’t mean anything. “Lu, it’s no biggie. Ever see her with anyone under seventy outside of her law classes and the DA’s office? She’s a good kid. Lonely is all. She invited me up after my shift to talk.”

“To talk?”

“That’s right.”

I’m thinking Lu’s about two seconds away from pouring coffee down my pants. “You’re already fucking her. Aren’t you, O’Brien? Jesus H. Christ. Didn’t I tell you not to fuck her?”

I meet her face, my expression hard. “I can honestly say I’m not fucking her.” Yet.

“Goddamnit, O’Brien.” She takes another gulp of coffee and says nothing more.

“You gonna rat me out?”

“If the higher-ups ask, then yeah, I’ll tell them.” She shakes her head. “Otherwise, they don’t need to know. I’ve seen the way she looks at you—hell, I’ve seen the way you look at her. Goddamn puppy-love shit makes me want to puke.”

“Then why are you pissed? She’s a nice girl.”

She squares her jaw. “That’s why I’m pissed. She’s not a whore, kid. And you’re all sorts of messed up. Do you really think she needs this shit?”

“You sayin’ I’m not good enough for her?”

“Yup.”

“The hell I’m not!”

“Oh, yeah. How’s counseling going? Oh,” she says all dramatic-like when I don’t say anything back. “It’s not, is it? Because you ain’t going.”

“Don’t need it,” I growl.

She rolls her eyes. “Yeah. It shows.”

“Lu—”

“How you sleeping, O’Brien? Resting good, getting all eight hours?” She huffs when I don’t answer. “That’s what I thought. Joey keeping you up at night? Or didn’t it bother you when he bled all over you like a gutted cow?”

“Lu, you don’t know shit.”

“Actually I do. On account of my first year on the force, I held a six-year-old in my arms, trying to tell her to stay alive while my partner cuffed her strung-out mother, who’d stabbed her. She didn’t make it. Neither did my partner two years later when her own goddamn husband took a bat to her head.” The grip to her paper cup tightens. “I responded to that one, too. Her face was so smashed up, the cops on duty needed help identifying the body.”

“Christ,” I mutter.

“My seventh year…” She waggles her finger at me. “Now, that was a doozie. Three of our veterans run over at a parade by some dad trying to steal his own kid. Ever pick up someone’s leg off the ground when it’s no longer attached? It kind of sucks, O’Brien.”

She doesn’t say much after that. She doesn’t need to. She made her point, and that was just her first seven years on the force.

We sit there in the quiet, both of us lost in the shit we’ve been handed. “Sorry, Lu.”

She shakes her head. “Don’t be sorry. Just get some help. So when you see what you’ll see, you’ll still be in good enough shape to see it. Suicide is for pussies, O’Brien.” She looks at me then. “Don’t be a pussy.”

Chapter 11