Chase moved to the edge of the bed, resting against his forearms. His eyes said he was fuming angry, but the smile that was forming on his face said otherwise.

“I feel the same, Gia. In fact, I believe that you were one of the best lays of the year. However, more will come and I do mean literally.” I narrowed my eyes. I wasn’t sure why his words caused anger to form within me. It wasn’t as if I wasn’t aware of the things he did. Maybe I had wanted to forget for a second, maybe I wanted to think that he had a soul underneath all the bullshit I had heard about him.

Without another word said, I slipped my clothes on and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind me. I told myself that if I had a chance with him I would never walk away like one of the millions of other girls did on this campus.

Yet here I was.

Tears formed behind my eyes as I headed out of the house.

Chase had a heart, I had felt it last night, and the sad part was I would never feel it again.

I couldn’t tell you how long I laid on my bed after she left. All I knew was that I dreaded the words I had said the second I

“Fucking. Stupid. Fucking…” I was fuming, raging, my fists clenched at my side. Last night had been amazing, exhilarating, but I should’ve known that one time with her would never be enough. When I slid into her, I felt at home. I felt whole, something that I never felt with any others. It was times like this that I hated the reputation that I had created for myself.

“You fucked her… didn’t you?” Chance was lingering at my bedroom door, his words held anger and disappointment as if he expected more from me. I shook my head as I looked into his eyes. I so didn’t want to fucking talk about Gia with him.

I stayed silent and I knew in doing so it did me no good. Saying I did made it apparent and being silent did too, so I just said nothing knowing he knew anyway. Twin intuition and all.

“I tell you to stay away, I tell you not to cross the fucking line because she’s not even in the same league as the other girls you fuck with, and you take that line and obliterate it.” I rolled my eyes at his words, he had a knack for sticking his nose where it didn’t belong. Preferably my business.

“You saw me with her last night, don’t pretend to be the good brother here. You know what I was doing with her, and it’s not like she didn’t want it too,” I said between clenched teeth.

Chance entered my room completely and came to settle on one of the chairs in the far corner of my bedroom.

“She’s better than you. Better than whatever the fuck it is that you think you can offer her. You know that, and you know that I don’t have to explain that shit to you. You’re a playboy who loves to party. She’s a good girl trying to graduate at the top of our senior class. I didn’t think you were stupid enough to put yourself in that situation.” Everything he was saying was hitting me directly in the chest, like he was tackling me to the ground in an effort to knock some fucking sense into me.

I was mad, but was I really mad at him or myself? I had screwed up, I had crossed the line that I said I wouldn’t.

“Chance, I know I fucked up…” I sighed, my head in my hands. “She’s just…” What was she to me, could I even explain to him how she made me feel?

“She’s what? I’m sure whatever she thought about you before, she now feels was absolutely right. I saw her face as she walked out of the house. She wasn’t fucking pleased in the least bit.”

Great! Fucking great! I wanted to scream, to punch something, to expel the anger building inside of me, but I knew I deserved it. I had earned this hate.

“To me she’s different, she’s better than the others. I might not ever admit it to her, or anyone besides you, but she’s better than them. I feel something with her that I have never felt,” I huffed out.

Chance remained silent for some time before finally speaking, and when he did, I was in a knot over what to fucking do.

“My advice is that you leave her alone. Let the pieces land where they will. You got what you wanted, move the fuck on. I need to be able to do my job and help her get to the top by tutoring her.” I lifted my head from my hands. He wanted me to leave her alone? After the night we had just shared? I wasn’t sure that I could do that.

“I don’t know…” Chance’s hand landed upon my shoulder squeezing it tightly.

“I don’t care if you don’t know if you can do it or not. Just do it anyway. She deserves better and more, and I won’t tell you that again.” His eyes narrowed, and I knew he was being honest. He wouldn’t tell me again. If I crossed the line again, he would make it known.

The anger within me stilled as I listened to him leave the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

I wanted to be angry at him, to lash out and say ‘you can’t tell me what to do’, but I knew that this was all on me and that he was watching out for Gia. He knew the damage that I could cause, hell the damage I had already caused. No one knew me better than my brother, and he knew Gia had a better chance at surviving all of this if we just let last night be a distant memory.

One night. That’s all it was. That’s all that it would ever be. I needed to push the memories to the back of my mind, to move on from whatever feelings I thought I had towards her. I never went for the same woman twice. She wouldn’t be any different.

She’s just like them. She’s not better than them. She just wanted to use you, just like they did.

I talked her down inside of my head, knowing that if I didn’t my obsession to lay claim to her would never stop.

I spent the rest of the afternoon in my bedroom, lying in my covers that smelt just like her. It was disturbing for even me, but it would be the last time I would ever smell her upon my sheets.

My mind lingered to the events from the night before even though I repeatedly told myself that I needed to forget them. I just couldn’t, they were embedded in my thoughts.

I could see her chest moving up and down, shallow breaths filtering in and out. She was beautiful, magnificent in the simplest of ways. Her face was scrunched up, wrinkles formed on her brow. I had to stop myself from reaching out to rub them away. She shouldn’t be worried, not while dreaming, not while in my bed.

“You don’t know how beautiful you truly are,” I whispered so quietly I almost didn’t hear myself speak.

She stirred lightly, rolling over to face me. My heart was beating out of my chest as I stared at her, waiting for the moment that her eyes would open and she would know I had been watching her sleep.

This was different for me. Everything about Gia was different for me. I never let them stay after sex, and I most definitely never lingered around long enough to watch them fall asleep. Yet here I was, forcing myself not to reach out and touch the contours of her face.

The moonlight poured in through the window above us silhouetting her body against the bed. Looking at her I knew she was everything I needed in life, but the very last thing at the same time.

A complete and utter contradiction.

Gia caused a fire to stir in my chest, but with the same token made me want to burn her with that very fire. The feelings she caused in me I had never felt before, and that made her dangerous. No, it made her more than dangerous.

It made her loveable.

It made me capable of love.

If those two things happened, there would be no coming back from it.

Something drew me back to the present, call it my conscious or just the fact that I shouldn’t have been thinking about her. My eyes drifted over to the spot where she had laid just an hour ago, and I knew it was time to let what I had experienced go.