“Yes, but the Mason’s will also be here. You know the boys, don’t you, Dear? Don’t they have some classes with you or Link?” Mrs. Beasley asks, unaware of the mini nervous breakdown I’m having in the backseat.

“They have some classes with Link and Reece. I hardly ever talk to them. I’d rather skip this visit,” I say, almost pleading. It’s one thing to admire Cole at school where we are surrounded by the other kids. It’s a whole ‘nother ball game when I have to be around him with no one to hide behind.

It’s not that I’m scared of being around Cole, not at all. I have one hell of a crush on Cole. I might even love him… I think. Our lockers have been next to each other since I started school and I’ve enjoyed every locker moment we’ve shared. But to spend an evening in his house? That’s borderline suicidal.

“You’ll have fun. The evenings you never plan are the ones you enjoy most,” Pastor Beasley says.

I roll my eyes at his annoying saying. Normally I love his sayings but tonight I hate them. There is no way I’m going to enjoy this. I work hard at being invisible. How on earth am I going to manage that? Maybe I can slip away when no one is watching? Maybe I can offer my help in the kitchen and just stay there? Maybe I can-

The front door opens and an older version of Cole steps out onto the porch. Definitely, his dad.

“Pastor Beasley, thank you so much for comin’,” he says, reaching out his hand.

They laugh and talk, but when I see Cole standing behind his dad, I can’t hear anything above the blood rushing through my ears. I dart back behind the wall. Sucking in deep breaths, I wait for Pastor Beastly and Mrs. Beastly to walk in first. I really don’t have a choice anymore. Everyone has gone inside. I force my feet forward and keeping my head down, I slip inside.

“Hi, Bridget.” Cole brushes past me, numbing every part of my body. He closes the door behind me and the clicking sound brings me crashing down to Mother Earth.

“Hi,” I squeak and it pretty much sounds like I sucked on a balloon filled with helium. Kill me now! Listening for the voices, I follow them until I find them in the living room. I dart to Pastor Beasley’s side and almost fall down beside him. He smiles at me and gives my hand a quick squeeze. Normally it helps to settle my nerves. This time it does nothing.

My eyes follow Cole as he walks by me to where Travis is sitting at a bar area in what looks like an entertainment area. He leans his elbow on the counter and it makes the fabric of the chocolate brown shirt he’s wearing stretch across his chest. It complements his tanned complexion. My eyes drift back up to his face and when my eyes meet his, a blush creeps up my neck.

Way to go, Bridget. Why not just drool next time while you’re at it?! His icy blue eyes don’t look away from mine and Pastor Beasley has to nudge me to get my attention.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, tearing my eyes away from Cole.

“Mrs. Trenton is talkin’, Dear,” Pastor Beasley fills me in on what I’ve been missing while openly day dreaming over Cole.

“I was sayin’ that you’ve become quite the beauty,” Mrs. Trenton says, and that seals my embarrassment for the evening. I’m officially dying.

“Thank you,” I murmur. Looking for Pastor Beasley’s hand, I grab hold with no intention of letting go. Right now I need his strength, all of it.

“You were such a tiny thing when you came to Lyman,” Mrs. Mason says, and my heart starts to beat faster. Pastor Beasley tightens his hold on my hand and starts rubbing slow circles with his thumb on the back of my hand. It helps to give me something else to concentrate on. “At least you got some height over the years.”

I can’t bring myself to smile, or look up again. I’m spiraling from embarrassment straight into a pit of mortification.

“You seem to have settled in well, and Link as well,” Mrs. Mason goes on, as if it’s okay to discuss these things every day. It’s private. It’s our lives, and no I haven’t settled in okay. I want her to stop because every word is a stab at my fragile heart.

“Pastor Beasley, I just want to let you know how grateful we are for what you are doing for the boys,” Mr. Mason says. My shoulders sag with relief, glad that they’re stepping of the topic of my personal life.

“Of course,” Pastor Beasley says. It feels as if everything is settling around us. “It’s nothin’ I wouldn’t do for any of the other kids.”

“You’re really a pillar of this community,” Mr. Trenton goes on. “If you have any problems with Trevor Liles again you just say the word and I’ll sort him out.”

My world stops at hearing my father’s name. Trevor Liles. I haven’t heard that name in almost five years. My blood starts to pulse fast and hard through my veins, and I don’t know how my legs move but I manage to get up and make them move. With every step I take my breathing speeds up, taking me a breath closer to a dreadful panic attack.

“Honey, don’t,” Pastor Beasley says. “Let me explain.”

I take a few more steps and then Mr. Trenton stands up. “Did I say somethin’ wrong?” he asks.

Why does he know about my father? What does he know?

“I thought no one knew,” I whisper to no one in particular. Locking eyes with Pastor Beasley, it feels as if my heart is shattering at my feet. “I trusted you.”

“I didn’t tell anyone, Dear. Let’s go talk about this,” he says in a gentle voice that could always calm me.

“How does he know?” I ask. My voice sounds thin and I try to breathe faster as the darkness starts to creep up on me. I can’t have a panic attack here. Not in front of all these people.

“Your father wrote a letter to you,” Mr. Trenton says.

“Not now, William!” Pastor Beasley hushes him.

“He did what?” I shriek. “He knows where I am?”

“He can’t hurt you,” Pastor Beasley takes a step toward me. I take one backwards and then panic and fear hits me full on, unlike anything I’ve felt before.

“He will.” I turn and run as if I’m running from the devil himself. I have to get away as fast as I can. He knows where I am! He’ll come for me! He’ll finish what he started all those years back. He’ll kill me this time!

I yank the front door open and take the porch steps in one jump. The Trenton’s have a big front yard. In front of me is a stretch of green lawn. I cover half the distance when an arm swoops around my waist. The grip is so hard my breath gets ripped right from my lungs. My feet lift from the ground and as the person swings me around I come face to face with Cole as he runs towards us.

“I’ll take her, Travis,” he says. They’re not even out of breath from coming after me! I’m panting like a dog, totally breathless.

“I’m not going back in,” I snap.

“You don’t have to,” Cole says as Travis sets me down. Cole’s fingers wrap around my arm, as if he’s scared I’ll make a run for it again. His eyes dart over my head to Travis. “Will you tell them I’m going for a walk with Bridget?”

“Sure thing, man.” Travis says. He jogs back and I keep my eyes on the front door until he closes it behind him. I glance up at Cole. He loosens his grip on me, but he doesn’t let go. His touch is calming, in a different way as to what Pastor Beasley’s is. Cole has been my happy zone for a very long time.

Over the past year he’s filled out quite nicely with all the sports he’s done.

“Let’s go for that walk,” he says.

His hand slides down my arm until he reaches my hand. When his fingers interlace with mine, a fire cracker explodes somewhere between my left lung and my heart, leaving my insides in a mushy mess.

We walk in silence all the way to the corner of the street before I gather the guts to say something. “I’m sorry for weirding out like that at your house.”

“My dad shouldn’t have said the things he did,” he says.

You see why I love the guy so much? He never does or says anything wrong!