She glanced around the room, which didn’t improve on a second inspection. A layer of dust covered everything, the carpet was stained and a pall of cigarette smoke hung in the air. There was a poster of The Clash pinned to the wall, one corner curling where the drawing pin had fallen out.

Eddie came back with two mugs of coffee and placed one on the table in front of her. ‘So, are you with anyone now?’

Sadie didn’t answer his question. ‘So, is it serious with Kelly?’

Eddie gave one of his shrugs. ‘She’s a laugh.’

Sadie found it hard to believe how intensely she had once loved him. It had been a young, mad passion, a fire that had blazed too brightly. In those heady days she had not been able to imagine life without him. She took a sip of coffee, staring at his face from over the rim of her mug. Where had all those feelings gone? There was nothing left but resignation and a soft lingering resentment. ‘Well, so long as she’s a laugh.’

Eddie sat back, watching her carefully. ‘I got in a bit of a mess, to be honest.’

‘Huh?’

‘Back then, when we were together. I shouldn’t have done a runner like that. It just all got on top of me.’

‘Poor Eddie,’ she said.

‘I’m a bit strapped at the moment but I’ll pay you back, every penny… when I get some cash.’

‘I won’t hold my breath.’

‘Since when did you get so cynical?’

Sadie widened her eyes. ‘Do you really want to go there?’

Eddie put out his fag and immediately lit another. ‘Still, we had some good times, didn’t we? It wasn’t all bad.’

‘No,’ she said. ‘Just most of it.’

Eddie flashed another of his wide smiles, placing his free hand on his heart. ‘Ah, don’t say that, babe. I’ll tell you what, why don’t we go and grab some breakfast and have a proper catch-up?’

‘Because I’ve got a train to catch. Just sign the papers, will you?’

Eddie flicked his cigarette in the general direction of the ashtray. ‘You know, I don’t think I’ve actually got a pen in the flat.’

Sadie took a biro out of her bag and threw it into his lap. ‘Here.’

But still he procrastinated. ‘Are you sure you really want to do this?’

‘I’m sure.’

He tapped the pen against his teeth. ‘It’s kind of final, though, isn’t it?’

‘That’s the point.’

‘I dunno,’ he said. ‘Maybe this isn’t the right time.’

Exasperated, Sadie decided to resort to desperate measures. ‘Have you been in touch with Theresa?’

Eddie assumed his innocent expression again. ‘Who?’

‘Theresa Rimmer. You remember – the girl who lived down the street in Tufnell Park, the girl you were shagging behind my back. Well, one of them anyway. Or maybe you can’t remember all their names.’

Eddie glanced away, his eyes shifty.

‘She came looking for you,’ Sadie continued, ‘but then she would, wouldn’t she, her being pregnant and all.’

‘I doubt if it was mine,’ he said. ‘She’d fuck anything, that one.’

‘Two of a kind, then.’

Eddie smirked. ‘It was a mistake. C’mon, we all make mistakes.’

‘You could always do a paternity test, sort it out once and for all. Perhaps I should give her a ring, let her know where you’re living now.’

Eddie’s face paled, his smirk quickly fading. ‘You wouldn’t.’

Sadie gave a nod. ‘Why not?’ There was something cheap, something low, about blackmailing him over an unwanted child, but she couldn’t see any other way of getting him to cooperate. If she had to play dirty, she would. She stared meaningfully towards the divorce papers. ‘I mean, it’s not as though you’re doing anything to help me.’

And finally Eddie gave up the fight. Snatching up the papers he signed on the dotted line and thrust the document gracelessly into her hand. ‘Since when did you become so hard, Sadie Wise? You used to be a nice sweet girl.’

‘No, I used to be a nice sweet gullible girl.’ She stashed the papers in her bag and smiled. ‘Thanks. I appreciate it.’

As she rose to her feet, Eddie said, ‘You’re not going, are you? Stay a while. Finish your coffee at least.’

Sadie shook her head. ‘Sorry. Like I said, I’ve got a train to catch.’

He followed her into the hallway and leaned against the wall as she opened the door. ‘Don’t I even get a proper goodbye?’

Sadie paused, gazed at his face for a moment – one last memory – and then put her fingers to her lips and blew him a kiss. ‘Bye, Eddie. Take care.’

‘I’ll see you around.’

But Sadie knew that was never going to happen. This was the last goodbye. She was moving on. She was finally closing the door on the past.

10

Mona Farrell turned the Beretta around in her fingers, feeling the smooth coolness of the metal. It was a small, neat, lightweight gun that could easily be carried around in a handbag. Point and shoot. That’s all you had to do. What could be easier? She aimed the gun at the pottery dog sitting on the mantelpiece.

‘Bang bang,’ she said. ‘You’re dead.’

Mona smiled. She’d had the gun for three years now, ever since the burglary. She kept it under the floorboards in her bedroom, safely hidden, only taking it out when she knew she wouldn’t be disturbed. Some people might view it as chance that she had found the weapon lying in the hall, dropped by the thieves who had swept through the house (relieving her mother of her jewellery and her father of his extensive gun collection), but she saw it as fate. God had wanted her to have it. So she had picked it up, put it in her pocket and no one had been any the wiser.

Mona wandered over to the window and gazed out at the snow that had been falling for hours. A white blanket covered the garden. Usually Sundays were boring, long and slow, tainted by the knowledge that Monday was to follow. And Mondays, historically, had always meant school or college or work. She had not got on well with any of these things. They simply didn’t suit her. She’d been expelled from more schools than she cared to remember, dropped out of numerous courses and been sacked from every job she’d ever been hired for.

It was no big deal, though. She was only twenty-three. Why should she be shackled to a desk for the rest of her life? Her father banged on about responsibility, but she couldn’t see what was responsible about blowing another human being limb from limb. No, she would find her own way in her own time. Maybe she’d start her own business. Maybe she’d go into business with Sadie. That would be fun, just the two of them.

Mona pressed her nose against the glass. Thinking of Sadie reminded her of what she’d done that day, of what had made this Sunday different to all the others. It was a good thing she’d got to Kellston early or she might have missed the boat. She’d only been there ten minutes when Sadie had come out of Oaklands and headed for the high street. Following her hadn’t been so easy this time. The road had been quiet, almost deserted, and she’d had to keep her distance.

Still, it had worked out well in the end. And in a way it had added to the thrill. Every step she’d taken, she’d been worried that Sadie would glance over her shoulder and spot her. But her friend must have had other things on her mind. Unlike at the market when Sadie had definitely felt her presence, this time she’d been completely oblivious.

Sadie had hesitated when she’d reached the Mansfield. Mona had been able to tell that she didn’t want to go in there, and who could blame her? It was clearly a sink estate with nothing to recommend it other than cheap accommodation and a constant supply of marijuana. It wasn’t the kind of place that any self-respecting girl would want to venture into.

And then… and then… Sadie had turned around and started walking straight back towards her. That had been a moment! She could still recall how her heart had almost leapt out of her chest. There was nowhere to go. Sadie was going to see her. She had to. And when she did, how the hell was she going to explain what she was doing there?