Zander Brockman didn’t want to be my white knight. He wanted his life back and I couldn’t blame him. He was a great guy and he deserved to have the life he wanted.

It wasn’t his fault that my heart was shattered, that I couldn’t fucking breathe for the pain. I’d lost him…

No, I’d never really had him.

If I was lucky, I wouldn’t have to face him again. I’d no longer be living next door to him so I wouldn’t risk running into him every day. He had to work and I still had school, so avoiding him wouldn’t be hard. That was the only way I’d ever be able to move on.

There was a tap on the bathroom door and I lifted my head as the door opened a few inches. My heart stopped, thinking it was Zander and my humiliation would be complete. When Chelsea’s dark blond head appeared around the edge of the door, I was able to breathe again, barely.

Her eyes landed on me where I was huddled up against the bathtub. Sympathy filled her dark blue gaze. She closed and locked the door before dropping down onto the bathroom floor beside me. Holding open her arms, I let her pull me against her and I bawled like a baby until my throat was raw.

C HAPTER S EVEN

Annabelle

The weekend dragged by.

I tried to study for my make-up test, but couldn’t take in anything I read. My head ached from crying myself to sleep Saturday night and most of Sunday morning. Thankfully, Noah left me alone. I guess he realized I wasn’t in a good place because he brought me a Pop-Tart and a glass of orange juice—his equivalent to breakfast in bed—before heading out to spend the day with Chelsea.

Monday, I took the bus to school and went through the day on autopilot. Somehow I managed to get a B on my make-up test, but I honestly didn’t know how. Maybe my teacher took pity on me since I had dark circles under my red-rimmed and bloodshot eyes. Who knows, I was just glad to have the whole thing behind me.

After school I returned to the garage and worked a few hours in the office before climbing the steps to the apartment and doing my homework in bed. Noah had tried to talk to me, but I hadn’t had the energy to do more than answer him with as few words as possible. Even Wade had tried to get me to smile, a rare thing for the old mechanic, but I wasn’t able to make my face muscles work to satisfy him.

That became my routine for the rest of the week. School, work, then straight to bed to do homework. I didn’t sleep much during the night. I no longer needed to worry about a possible surprise attack so it wasn’t because I was scared to close my eyes. It was the lack of a certain warm body lying in bed next to me that kept me awake most of the night. I missed Zander. Missed his hogging the bed, missed his warm body curled behind me, holding me all night. Missed the damn scent of his harsh soap and mint shampoo he used. Missed the sound of his heart beating under my ear and the sound of his slight snore when he was tired after a long day of working.

I missed talking to him every day, damn it.

I should have been happy to be out of my mother’s house. I was safe with Noah, and I knew that it was where I needed to be. My heart, however, didn’t care that I was supposed to be happy. It missed Zander the most.

Finally, Friday arrived and I was able to pass a calculus quiz and a history exam without much trouble. Neither were the A’s that I was used to, but at least they were high enough scores that my teachers didn’t give me disappointed looks and a frigging lecture as they handed back the papers.

The last bell of the day rang and I tossed all my books into my backpack before following the rest of my classmates out. Pushing my hair back from my face, I headed to my bus¸ wanting nothing more than to get to work and have the week end.

“Annabelle!”

Great. Now I was hearing things. My mind told me that it was just a figment of my imagination, but it was my heart that had my head snapping up at the sound of Zander’s voice calling my name.

From across the parking lot, I spotted Zander climbing out of his truck and my heart actually stopped for a second. He was still dressed in his work clothes, but he wasn’t as disheveled as he normally was at the end of a workday. Briefly I wondered what he was doing there, since his workday didn’t end until five and it was only two thirty. That thought was quickly brushed aside as my gaze ate up the sight of the beautiful boy/man walking toward me with a determined gait to his step.

The uniform jeans and work shirt that stated he worked for the county DOT fit him well—the jeans hanging low on his narrow waist and the shirt pulled tight over his lean, muscular chest that I’d been aching to lay my head on. His hair was unkempt, as if he’d been running his fingers through the slightly curly locks all day. Even from the distance that still separated us, I could tell he had dark shadows under his hazel eyes, but there was no hazel remaining today; just pure green jade and a few golden flecks.

My heart twisted painfully, wondering how close to the edge he was feeling. The fewer gold flecks in those amazing eyes of his, the more his OCD seemed to rear its head.

I stood on the sidewalk, frozen with a mixture of excitement at seeing him for the first time in nearly a week and anxiety after the humiliating way I’d cried all over him. Other students had to move around me as they rushed to catch their buses or whatever ride they had home.

As Zander came closer he thrust his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. His jaw was clenched but his gaze was locked on me. I swallowed hard, wanting nothing more than to throw myself into his arms and beg him to hold me one more time. One more damn time. The only thing that kept me from doing just that was the knowledge that he wouldn’t want that. He was done holding me.

“Um…hi?” I greeted with a forced smile when he was only a few feet away.

“Hi.” His voice came out rough, as if he hadn’t spoken much that day.

I adjusted my heavy backpack on my shoulders and glanced at his truck, expecting to see Devlin sitting in the passenger seat. Of course he wasn’t since I hadn’t seen him the first time I’d looked that way. It wasn’t like Devlin Cutter would have been hard to miss, after all.

“What are you doing here?” I asked. “Is everything okay?”

He shrugged. “I took half the day off.”

I frowned. “You did? But you never do that.” Not even when he was sick. He’d had the stomach flu at the beginning of the summer but he’d still gone to work. No one had wanted to be on the road crew with Zander that day.

He pulled his hands free from his jeans and offered one to me. “I couldn’t wait until after work to see you. Thought maybe I’d give you a ride home. Come on.”

I barely hesitated before putting my hand in his. My heart was doing backflips in my chest and my head was so curious, wondering what was going on, that it didn’t yell at me as I placed my hand in his much larger one. He linked his fingers through mine and everything inside of me seemed to relax for the first time all week. Suddenly it was easier to take a deep breath. My heart seemed to trip over itself as it started beating normally again. Stupidly, tears burned my eyes and I kept my face averted so he wouldn’t see them as he led me to his truck and helped me into the passenger seat.

I busied myself putting on my seatbelt as he climbed behind the steering wheel and started the truck. I kept my eyes on the buses that were slowly leaving the parking lot while he put the truck in reverse and backed out of the space he’d been lucky to find so close to the front of the school.

Somehow I was able to get my tears under control before he pulled into traffic and I let myself look at him again. His jaw was still clenched, but his shoulders didn’t look nearly as tense. For a brief second I wondered if he had missed me as much as I’d missed him over the past week, but quickly called myself an idiot for even thinking that it might be a possibility. He’d probably been jumping on his damn bed Saturday night he was so happy to be done with having to take care of me.