“Don’t,” I whispered. “Don’t let them watch it. I don’t want Chelsea and Mieke upset when they see me.”

I heard the deep breath that Noah blew out, and I clenched my fingers even tighter around the phone, making my entire hand ache. “Annabelle—”

“I have to go, Noah. I love you.”

“Damn it, Annabelle.” I heard his growl but didn’t wait for the explosion that was about to erupt from my brother. I hated that he was upset with me, but I couldn’t let them see me right then. Not when my emotions were so close to the surface. Not when everything was churning inside of me like a hurricane.

I quickly disconnected and put my phone away. Turning, I refused to let my gaze travel across the room. Thankfully Emmie was walking toward me, immediately distracting me from my inner chaos. The little redhead with those big green eyes didn’t smile as she approached, but I doubted she would smile again anytime soon. I could understand what she was going through, having nearly lost her daughter less than twenty-four hours before. My heart clenched in sympathy for her.

“Ready?” Emmie demanded in a hard-as-steel tone.

I gave her a firm nod and turned toward the ICU’s waiting-room door. Opening it for her, I waited as she exited before following her. Only when the door was firmly closed behind us and we were about to step onto the elevator where two guards stood at attention, did I relax a little. Damn, I was exhausted.

Just being in the same room with Zander had been enough to drain me of all my physical and emotional strength.

How the hell was I going to keep this up for however long it took before this shit was over?

 

C HAPTER O NE

17 years ago

Annabelle

The sound of something breaking jerked me awake. With a gasp, I sat up in bed and strained my ears as I tried to listen for what had awoken me.

“I don’t know why I ever married you, you worthless piece of shit!”

When I heard Mom’s screech I jumped out of bed and grabbed my backpack. She was drinking—again. When she drank, she got mean, and lately that was more often than not. If she was yelling, then she was yelling at Jacob, and that never ended well. At least not for me. She would take out her rage on her husband, and he would take his out on me if I didn’t leave now.

It didn’t matter that I was only in a pair of pajama shorts and a tank top without a bra. My backpack was like my survival pack. I always kept what I needed in there for when this happened. I had a change of clothes as well as a few Pop-Tarts and a bottle of water in there along with my schoolbooks.

My bare feet landed on the damp grass outside my bedroom window and I moved quickly toward the darkened window of the house next door. Recently this had become an almost nightly habit, and I knew that if he wasn’t home, his window would still be unlocked for me. If by some chance it wasn’t, then I had one other option. That was the good thing about having friends that were also your next-door neighbors.

I tapped my fingernails on the window, silently counting to myself until I reached fourteen. It would drive him crazy if I didn’t wait to get to fourteen and he was in there. I held my breath, hoping that he was home. It wasn’t that he had to be home for me to hide out in his room, but that I needed him to be there.

Before I could draw another breath, the curtains flickered and the window opened enough for me to climb in. The bed was right under the window and I dropped down onto it, tossing my backpack on the floor before wrapping my arms around Zander’s waist and burying my face in his chest.

Strong fingers tangled in my hair, holding me against him as I tried to contain my broken sob. Fear was still racing through me and I kept wondering what would have happened if I hadn’t heard my mother, if she hadn’t woken me up. How long would it have been before Jacob had been in my room?

“Are you hurt?” His voice was rough with sleep but full of dangerous promises if I told him I was.

“No,” I whispered, my voice quivering.

He released a relieved sigh. “It’s okay, Anna. You’re okay. I’ve got you.” Zander kept whispering those words over and over again against my ear and slowly I began to relax.

He was right. I was safe here with him holding me. I knew that Jacob wouldn’t dare come here. Not only did he not want Zander’s grandparents to know why I was hiding from him in their grandson’s room, but he also wouldn’t risk the hell storm that would fall on him if he dared to upset Zander.

My tears started to dry and I closed my eyes as I soaked up the feeling of security that being in Zander’s arms gave me. Before long my breathing began to even out and I fell into a dreamless sleep.

Safe. I was safe here…

Sunlight streaming through the open window woke me the next morning. I stretched and smiled when I came into contact with the hard body still lying beside me. My heart melted at the sight of the guy who had become my hero over the last few months.

I’d known Zander all my life. He and his mom had lived with his grandparents in the house beside mine before I’d even been born. Best friends with my brother, I’d grown up loving the boy who was two years older than me just as much as my own brother. We’d been playmates, friends, and each other’s shoulder to cry on from the time I could walk. I was the one he’d sought out when his mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer. He was the one I’d wanted holding my hand when we’d said goodbye to my dad after his accident. The day his mother joined my dad in Heaven, I’d held onto him just as tightly as he’d held onto me, offering him all the love and support I could give.

Out of all of my brother’s friends, out of all the people I knew I could turn to, it was Zander that I’d gone to when things had started getting ugly at home over the summer. The first night I’d knocked on his window, he’d been ready to slay the dragon that was my stepfather for me.

There was a reason why Zander only had a handful of friends. For the most part he was just the guy who got into trouble for pulling harmless pranks with my brother and their friends. He was full of humor, and his ability to make me smile even at the lowest of times had always melted my heart. It was what came when his hazel eyes turned green that made people keep their distance from him. He had a temper, and while it took a lot to get him riled up, once he was, it could get dangerous if someone wasn’t careful.

I’d heard the whispers, the ones from people who thought his mind was broken because of his OCD. Just as I’d heard the whispers about how they knew he was going to hurt me one day with his violent temper. I wanted to laugh in their faces. Neither of those things were true. He wasn’t broken, far from it. Although he doubted himself, I knew that Zander was the least broken person in the world. As for hurting me, I knew that he would never do that. Zander would have killed for me, but he would never touch me with anything that resembled violence.

Jacob was a different story, however. After what had happened that first night, after seeing the bruises from where my stepfather had woken me by dragging me out of my bed and beating me, I’d had to beg Zander not to do anything to him. We’d stayed in his room together that entire weekend before I trusted him not to rip Jacob apart. But I knew that he must have said something to my stepfather, because Jacob kept a wide berth when he was around Zander these days.

I pushed myself up onto my elbow so I could look down at Zander better. Sometime over the last few months my feelings for him had changed dramatically. When I looked at him I didn’t see the boy I’d grown up loving as much as my own brother; I now saw the man who was sexy as sin and held my heart in an entirely different way.


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