“I don’t know what I want.” She speaks into my chest, and it’s probably the most honest thing she’s said all night.

“Come on. Let’s get you to bed.” I decide to end this conversation, at least for now. Whatever she’s stewing over isn’t going to go away tonight. I’ve already tried to bring her out of it and was unsuccessful. I’ll let it go this evening, but tomorrow is a new day.

I reach forward and turn off the water. We step out of the shower, and I wrap her in a towel before grabbing one for myself. She lets me take the lead, drying her off before moving her back to my bed. We don’t say another word as we dress for bed. Unsure of what I’m looking at with our situation, I let her run things. She heads back to the bathroom and dries her hair. I climb between the sheets and wait to see if she comes to me. After everything else tonight, I wouldn’t be surprised if she made her way back to her room. If it happens, I’ll follow. Five minutes later, she steps out of the bathroom and comes to my bed.

I don’t show my relief. Instead, I pull the blanket back and let her climb in.

She settles, still keeping the silence, so I turn the light off, bathing the room in darkness. Another five minutes go by and she finally shifts, rolling to face me.

“Beau, I’m falling in love with you. And maybe that’s too soon to say, or too soon for you to hear, but I need you to know.” She rests her palm over my naked chest.

“Darlin’—” I begin, but she cuts me off.

“I didn’t tell you so you can say it back. I just wanted you to know.”

Jesus, I’m on a rollercoaster right now. Ups and downs, and fucking looping everywhere.

“Okay,” I whisper, pulling her closer to me. The urge to tell her back is strong, but I don’t. Not because I don’t feel the same way. Fuck, I think I fell in love with her the second she walked into the clubhouse. No, I don’t say it back because something’s not right. It’s almost like she had to tell me before it was too late.

But too late for what?

An unease settles over me, and digs in so deep I know it isn’t going away. She’s up to something and I don’t know what the fuck it is, but I’m sure as hell going to find out.

Sooner or later I am going to find out.

Past Mackenzie

“I’m out Fred!” I shout, reaching for my bag.

“If you wait ten minutes, I’ll take you home,” he yells back, but it’s the last thing I want. Not tonight. I just want to go home after my long shift.

“No, it’s fine. I’m beat. I just want the quickest way into a shower so I can crawl into bed.”

Fred pokes his head around the corner and lowers his brows. I can see he intends to argue with me.

“Leave her alone, Fred. She’s just down the road,” Carly starts on him before he starts on me.

We’ve been having the same argument since I’ve been working. Even with the gun and self-defense classes, he’s still overprotective.

“I know she’s just down the road, Carly.” He shakes his head at his wife, then levels his eyes back on me. “You still having problems with your new neighbor?” He changes tactics. “I can stop by and have a word with him.” Fred has become my self-appointed father, Carly my mother. They have been so good to me the last fifteen months. I hate keeping them at a distance.

“I spoke to him yesterday. He said he’s going to turn the level down a little.” I fill him in on my neighbor drama.

“He doesn’t, I’ll pay him a visit.” He nods to himself. I don’t argue with him about it. There are some battles you just won’t win with Fred. This will be another one.

“Okay, Fred.” I try to keep the frustration out of my voice. “Bye, Carly. See you tomorrow.”

“Night,” she calls back and I make my way to the front door.

“Girly, wait.” Fred stops me before I can step outside. “You call me if you need anything. Any time.”

“Will do,” I promise, before closing the door.

The walk home is quick. Living only two blocks from where I work has come in handy. Especially since I haven’t saved enough to buy my own car yet, much to Fred and Carly’s displeasure.

The last fifteen months in Ohio have been… I want to say great, but I would be lying. It’s been comfortable.

It’s not that I don’t like it here. I’ve grown close with Carly and Fred, and I enjoy working at their diner. It’s just that I’m not truly happy.

The hiding my past, the not knowing when it will catch up with me, the fear he’s going to find me. It’s like I’m a caged bird desperate to be freed, and if I were honest, I’m over it.

I continue to dwell on my predicament as I take three steps up to my small one-bedroom apartment. I wish I could just push it all out, relax and maybe breathe easy, but I can’t. I can’t allow myself to become complacent. Not when he could find me any day.

“Snap out of it.” I give myself a talking to as I reach the top of the stairs. “No more.” I shake my head just as I notice the doormat slightly off center.

What the hell? My senses flare as I check my surroundings.

I live on the bottom level of a low-rise apartment building. With only one level above me, I hardly ever see my neighbor, but it doesn’t mean I don’t hear him.

Max is a twenty-something-year-old gamer, who only moved in a few months back. Since then, it’s been hard to get a decent night’s sleep with the amount of noise coming out of his apartment.

Tonight it’s quiet, which tells me he’s either not in yet or he took my friendly noise complaint serious. Time will tell.

After doing a quick check of my surroundings I decide it’s my mind playing tricks on me. Kicking it back in place, I unlock the door and step inside. Everything looks normal and in place. The flowers on the table I picked up yesterday fill the room with a sweet floral scent. Relaxing into my nightly routine, I kick off my shoes, and place my bag down on the sofa, heading straight for the fridge to fill a large glass with my favorite wine.

After nibbling on some cheese, I take my glass to the bathroom and fill the tub. I strip off my clothes and waste no time sinking into the hot water.

Today’s been a busy day. The hot water eases the tension in my muscles and the wine relaxes my mind. This has become my standard routine every night. Wine. Bath. Bed.

After soaking for thirty minutes, the apartment walls start to shake with vibrations of gunfire and explosions, letting me know Max is in fact home.

Great. He didn’t take me serious.

Knowing I’m not going to be able to relax with the noise, I decide to call it a night. I stand and wrap a towel around my body. Not bothering with drying off completely, I take my glass and head to my room only to stop dead in my tracks.

“Hello, Mackenzie.” The wine glass falls to the carpet as his voice runs through me, and my world comes crashing around me.

“Ch-Chad?” My knees lock as I take in his form lying on my bed. His eyes rake over my body before coming to meet mine. I’ve been waiting for this moment the last eighteen months. Dreamed about how I would react, if I would react. But now that he’s here, it’s like it’s not real.

“Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you?” His jaw ticks and his eyes flash with something I’ve never seen before. It’s almost crazed. Feral.

“How did you find me?” I still haven’t moved. I’m dripping with water, wrapped in a small towel. My heart pounds rapidly in my chest, almost as loud as the noise coming from Max’s apartment.

“Fuck, it wasn’t easy. You, sweetheart, have cost me a fucking arm and leg trying to find you. I almost had you in Arizona when you called Heidi.” My pulse drums in my ears. Heidi.

“What did you do to her?” My mind runs a mile a minute. He wouldn’t dare.