“Cancer...”

I ran faster.

“Cancer…”

Was I throwing up?

I wiped my mouth and stepped away from the bushes, weeping, sobbing uncontrollably, and sucking in air that wasn’t available to me.

How the fuck could this be happening?

I needed to talk to Alex. I wanted Alex.

Oh God! Why?

I’m not sure how long I stood there and wailed. I think it was quite a while when I had finally shed the last of the tears that were left in me and stared off into nothing, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t feel, I was numb. I stood there in the dark looking at the place that was ours. I saw shadows from the bay window, then nothing. Darkness. I stepped one foot in front of the other, walking up the porch stairs.

I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw her.

Them.

Cole and Alex.

Kissing.

Him on top of her.

In our abandoned house.

Everything. I. Loved.

Was gone…

We walked down the beach.

“Darlin’,” Cole murmured, sweeping my hair away from my face.

“Hmm…”

“You haven’t been yourself all summer. Do you not want to go to UCLA?”

“What?” I stopped and looked at him. He met my stare, stepping closer to me.

“Do you not want to leave Oak Island?”

“What makes you say that?”

“It’s like you’re waiting for something. Or someone,” he intentionally added.

“I need to leave.”

“Okay, but that doesn’t answer my question.”

“This is my home, of course I’m going to miss it, Cole.”

“I get it, Alexandra, I really do, but you’ll be back, Oak Island it’s not going anywhere.”

It didn’t feel that way to me.

“I’ve known you for four years, that’s a long time. There are things that have happened between us that we have never spoken about. I’ve respected that because it’s what you’ve needed.”

“I know,” I whispered.

“Darlin’, I love you.” He reached for my hands, and I sucked in a breath I didn’t realize I held.

“That can’t be news to you. I know a part of you loves me, too. It may not be a huge part, but it’s there nonetheless.” He kissed them. “I want to know you. I want to know every part of you, but you hide from me. You’re coming to California with me, that has to mean something. You chose to be near me for a reason, don’t you think?”

I didn’t know if he was right or wrong, but I nodded anyway.

“Can you share something with me? Something no one knows about.”

I immediately looked behind him and he followed my stare. “What are you looking at, Darlin’?”

I took a deep solemn breath and said, “You want to know me, Cole?”

He spun to face me yet again. “More than anything.”

I nodded toward the house behind him and he followed me up the sand to the abandoned home that stored all my secrets. He followed me inside, and I lit the candles that were scarcely placed around the room, creating a soft illuminating allure to the reality of what I had done.

I brought Cole to our house.

Lucas’s and mine.

Ours.

I had to sit down from the uneasiness in my stomach. From my conscience telling me this was wrong.

I was wrong.

He sat beside me, a little too close for my comfort, but I didn’t say anything.

“What does this house mean to you?” he asked.

“Everything,” I simply stated.

He nodded in understanding. “I want to make new memories with you here.” He grabbed my chin with his fingers, guiding my lips to his and then kissed me.

At first it was soft like he tested his boundaries. I slightly parted my lips and he took that as an open invitation to slowly slip his tongue into my mouth. He tasted of mint and something I couldn’t quite put my finger on. He didn’t taste like Lucas and he’s the only other boy I’ve ever kissed. It wasn’t bad, he was a great kisser, but he wasn’t Lucas. Nothing compared to him. I was confused and overwhelmed, but I didn’t stop him when he deepened the kiss, tangling his tongue with mine in an urgency that explained how long he waited for this moment.

Which brought on an onslaught of memories.

His hand gripped the back of my neck, gently pushing me onto the blanket and pillows. I placed my hands on his chest but again didn’t stop him when he positioned his body on top of mine. I went with it. I let him kiss me. I let him surround me. I let him feel like I was his. It seemed like as more time went on the longer I let him have his way with me.

I tried.

I swear that I tried, but I couldn’t. Not now. Not here. Not like this.

I forcefully shoved him away from me and firmly stood up. “I’m sorry, Cole, I’m so sorry, but I can’t do this.” I opened the door and ran down the stairs, missing the last step and falling flat on my face.

“Shit!” he yelled, darting down the stairs behind me. “Darlin’, what are you doing running away from me like that?” He helped me up, but I whimpered when I straightened my knee.

“Come here.” He put my arm behind his neck and lifted me up into his arms, carrying me down to the beach as if I weighed nothing where there was more light to see.

“I’m really sorry, Cole, I shouldn’t have taken you there. I don’t know why I did, but you don’t deserve that.”

“Your knee is bleeding,” he reminded me as he placed me down on the sand.

“I’m fine. Are you listening to me?”

“I’m listening.” He swept a piece of hair away from my face. “I’m not going anywhere.”

I looked down at my injured knee, another scar to add to my memories, and I wasn’t talking about the one on my knee.

“Another one,” I ordered, tapping on the bar.

“Lucas, I could get in a lot of shit for serving you,” Stacey informed me.

“Like you give a shit if you get in trouble. Drink with me. I’ll buy you all the drinks you want, and I’ll tip you nice when we’re done.”

She grinned, grabbing another shot glass for herself and pouring tequila into both our glasses.

“You’re lucky I just got this job, Lucas Ryder.”

“I turn twenty-one in a few weeks who the fuck cares. This is a dive bar and no one ever comes in here.”

“True.”

The moment I saw Cole lying on top of Alex, I got out of there faster than a bat out of hell. If they were going to fuck, I sure as shit wasn’t going to stand there and watch it. I walked down the street until I saw a cab on the main road, telling the driver to take me to the nearest bar.

Call it fate.

Call it a coincidence.

Call it a fluke.

When I saw Stacey behind the bar, I knew the driver brought me to the right place. I hadn’t seen or spoken to her since last summer. Even then it was short and to the point. We hadn’t fucked in years, but as I watched her in her tiny jean miniskirt and her tight top with her tits displayed every time she leaned over the bar, I would be lying if my cock didn’t stand at attention remembering the feel of her pussy wrapped around my dick.

“What’s new?” I asked, staring at her tits, exactly the way she wanted me to.

She leaned forward, pressing them together tighter with her arms as she rested her elbows on the bar. “Same ol’ same ol’, I’m sure a big college man like yourself has way more stories than a small town girl like me,” she purred.

“There’s never been anything small town about you, Stacey.”

She smirked and her eyes beamed. I hadn’t meant it as a compliment, but apparently that’s how she accepted it.

“Where’s Half-Pint?”

I took my shot, hissing as it burned down my chest and into my stomach. The strong sting of alcohol coated my stomach and set my mood on fire, not that it needed any more ammunition.