Thankfully, Oz went into Oz mode and lightened up the mood with his account of how he and Callum first met in Scotland.  He gathered us round for story time and I took more pleasure than usual in sitting on Callum’s lap.  “How cute,” Ana remarked.  I could tell she didn’t mean it but I returned the saccharine smile she gave me and listened to Oz revisit the birth of the bromance.

They’d been at the same pub in Dufftown and struck up a conversation because the place actually had an old bottle of Pike Single Malt and Oz was drinking it.  Callum was surprised because the family distillery had gone under ruin, declared bankruptcy ages ago, had long stopped distributing and had exhausted itself in the fight to recover thousands of perfectly good barrels of whisky from the bank.  The company, barely a company anymore, was in shambles until Callum stepped in at the mere age twenty-four, determined to revive it though no one thought he could.  He was young.  But he did have years of business experience under his young belt thanks to the fact that he skipped college and started a prestigious internship at eighteen.

“Well, I found out about his predicament and I said, ‘Funny I should meet you then, since I come from a bloodline of alcoholics who build distilleries.’  I made a homemade whisky still when I was sixteen.  I kept it in my room,” Oz said, knocking back a full two fingers of Scotch like it was water.  “I mean it’s a little fucking tragic but I very well may have been nursed on the stuff because my mother reached for the bottle the second those wretched nine months were over.  But I turned out okay, I was a strong baby.  They tell me I delivered myself.”

“Legend says he walked out of the womb at four feet tall.”  Callum’s remark made me spit out my water.  Oz nodded seriously as if to say it’s true.  I honestly had no idea how Ana was distinguishing the true from the false for her story.  I was laughing too hard to even try.

“Now this – this is the part that convinced me that Callum was a good man and I had to hang onto this fellow.”

“Oh God.”

“See, there was this girl at the pub.  I was by no means interested in her but eh, I had sex with her last week anyway because, pfft,” he looked in his big hands for an answer, “I don’t know, she was pretty and when she took her shirt off I forgot that she had a history of stalking and breaking and entering, so you know, she was there that day.  And she was trying to take me home again even though the last time wasn’t very good.  She had this little cunt of a cat that had no hair and it was givin’ me growlers while she was going down on me and I’d been drinking that time since well before noon so I looked in its eyes and I felt… like it was telling me something.”

Callum’s forehead hit my shoulder as he laughed.  Even Ana was starting to lose her business poise as she giggled.

“I don’t know.  It’s possible I dropped acid that day too but I swear to God that hairless cat was saying, ‘Fucking save me, Osborne.  Take me away from this wretched woman.  She’s a crazy one.’  I swear I heard it.  He said, ‘I can’t live another minute with her, she’s mad.  I was happy before I met her.  I had hair before I met her and now look at me, I’m a fucking bald headed bastard.’  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.”

“Were you hearing it?” Callum objected.

“I couldn’t believe what I imagined I was hearing.  I was so horrified and I believed this woman was crazy because I’d seen it with my own two eyes.  I knew I had to get out of this situation because I didn’t want to end up a hairless bastard.  So I stole the cat and I left.”  Ana gasped.  Oz laughed and clarified that he did not actually steal the cat.  “No, I ran out without the ugly thing but it was one of the worst sexual experiences to date for me and for some reason this girl was still flirting with me the next week so I turned to Callum, I said, ‘Hey, mate, it’s been a pleasure talking to you and I’d like to continue this lovely conversation but I’ve got to escape that pretty girl over there because she’s a wee bit crazy and her bald cat is pure Satan,’ and it made no sense whatsoever to Callum but he said, ‘Say no more,’ and fuckin’ off we went.  Hand-in-hand, into the sunset.”

Ana burst out laughing so hard she fell onto Callum’s shoulder.  I overlooked it because I had to – we were all dying.

“I need to contest the hand-in-hand part but yeah, it was around sunset.”

“And the friendship was real enough for Cal to overlook the bit about the Satan cat.”

“Which he did explain at the next bar,” Callum said, holding me against his chest as he wiped his eyes with the knuckle of his thumb.  Ana was a limp mess of giggles on the couch.  Once again, I ignored the way she grabbed Callum’s thigh to get back up.  I was in too good a mood from the story and it carried all the way over to the hotel, a charming cottage that overlooked a bright green hill and the ruins of a Fourteenth century castle.  I was gazing out our breathtaking window when Callum came up behind me.

“Hey.”  I turned to see him grinning with his hands behind his back.  “Give me your hand.”  I did and he clasped a sparkling, rose gold bangle around my wrist.  “Happy birthday.”  My mouth parted as I stared down in awe of the rose-cut gems, gleaming with a life of their own.  “In case you’re ever crazy enough to think you aren’t worth it, you can look in the mirror while you’re wearing this and see that you upstage diamonds you’re so fucking perfect.”

My fingers touched to my lips as I admired it over my skin.  I wasn’t sure if it was the bracelet or his words that had me feeling more radiant than the precious stones.  “It’s so beautiful, Callum,” I breathed.  He smiled and brought me to the edge of the bed, holding both my hands.

“I’m going to try to make the shoot go by as fast as possible today.  I’m going to make sure I’ll make it to dinner with you,” he said.  Ana claimed the photographer had an emergency and had to leave early, which meant portraits had to be pushed up to my birthday.  Callum had planned for most of the day off but now he was going to be tied up till well into the evening.  I had a feeling Ana had something to do with the change of plans but I refused to let it upset me because I was in Scotland, for God’s sake, and everything around me was beautiful.  I could easily spend the day exploring and end my evening with a romantic dinner with Callum.  I wanted to finally accommodate his work schedule so it was perfect, really.

“I have a whole list of places I want to see, so don’t stress about rushing.  Just make sure you’ll be around to give me at least the last few hours of my birthday together.”

He kissed me.  “That won’t be a problem.”

* * *

I was sure my mood was radiating from my cheeks as I skipped out of the hotel.  I had a long, dusty pink sweater on that matched my new bracelet from Callum and there were rose-colored threads in the knee-high socks I wore under my long suede boots.  I felt like a walking smile.  I hardly minded that I walked ten minutes before realizing I’d forgotten my wallet at the hotel.  There was still a bounce in my step as I walked through the front doors but I slowed down when I heard Ana’s distinct drawl behind the wall of the lobby bar.

“I just wouldn’t have seen you with a girl like her.  She seems… obvious.  Vapid pretty girl.  Not a whole lot up here but enough right here to distract you from that.”

I froze next to the entrance, on the other side of the wall she sat against.  My body was immediately tense and I prayed right away that Ana was just on the phone.  With a friend.  Maybe an ex.  But the sentence that followed dashed what little hope I had for that.

“You seemed too smart to fall for that kind of superficial trap, Callum.”

My heart pounded at his name and the pain built in my chest as he took his time to respond.