I need the water to wash away what happened: seeing Todd walk out the door, all of it. I watch as the water goes down the drain and wish it was that simple to erase everything, to let it just float away down the drain.

Then I hear someone open the door. I must not have locked it.

“Ashley?” Ryan knocks as he says my name cautiously.

I don’t say anything. I’m not even sure I can speak. Normally, I would scream for him to get out, but I can’t bring myself to muster up the energy.

“I know you’re in there.”

I still don’t answer him.

“You’ve been in there for over an hour.”

At his words, I notice for the first time that the water is freezing. At some point, it changed from warm luxury to freezing drops of misery, but I’m so numb I barely feel it.

“Mom and Dad were afraid to come in, so they wanted me to check on you.” I hear him sit down and lean against the cabinet. “You okay?”

I laugh because that question couldn’t be more absurd.

“Well, at least you’re laughing,” he says, and then I hear him start to get up.

“I’m laughing because your question is ridiculous. What do you think? I’m totally fine. It’s great that Mom and Dad are making me break up with Todd.”

“I know, Ash. I just have no idea what to say to either of you. I can’t believe what just happened.” He slightly shouts over the pounding water. Part of me wants to get out because the water is freezing, and now that I’ve noticed, I can’t stop thinking about it. However, part of me doesn’t want to face reality. As soon as I get out, that’s what it will be—real. Plus, I don’t want Ryan to leave. I need to hear his voice to hold on to some sanity, but there is no way in hell I’m getting out of the shower with him in here. Thankfully, there is a shower curtain separating us.

“Todd is a mess,” Ryan says after a few minutes of silence.

Hearing those words makes me perk up a little, and I peek my head around the curtain. “You talked to him?”

“Yeah, I went after him when he left. He was outside in his car. He’s so pissed at his dad. Who knows what’s going to happen when they get home?”

“Sidney!” I say enthusiastically without even thinking as I slip back into the shower to shut the water off.

“What?”

“Sidney will know. I need to talk to her. Toss me a towel, please,” I shout over the curtain.

“Here you go, crazy,” Ryan says as my towel flies over the shower curtain and lands in my hands. “Why don’t you just talk to Todd?”

“Because he won’t tell me what’s happening with his dad, but Sid will. He’ll try to hide it from me, pretend everything is okay.”

“Yeah, that sounds like him. You really do know him, Ash.” I barely hear that last part; he says it so low.

“Duh. Now get out.” I need to talk to Sid. I’m not sure why this revelation has given me the boost I need to get out of the shower, but it does.

After a frantic search, I finally find my phone in the front pouch of Todd’s sweatshirt, and see there are twelve texts from Sid, all some variation of What happened? and Call me. The last one is from five minutes ago, so I’m sure she’s still up.

The phone doesn’t even ring before I hear Sid shout-whisper into the phone, “What happened?”

“It’s bad, Sid. How’s Todd?”

“Not good; hence, all of my texts. He came storming into the house, screaming at my dad. They were so loud they woke me up.”

“How about now?”

“Silence. Well, except I hear him on his guitar, and every once in a while, I hear something slam against the wall in his room.”

I take a deep breath. “Did you hear what they were saying when they were screaming at each other?”

“Not really. It was pretty muffled, but there were a lot of ‘how could yous?’ and I heard my mom down there, too. I figured it was best to pretend I was still asleep and call you for information since my brother is generally useless when it comes to stuff like this. I mean, he didn’t even tell me when you guys broke up last year.”

“Yeah, I know,” I whisper back.

“I think they took his phone.”

“Good to know.” My heart sinks. That was our only lifeline, but it explains why I only have texts from Sid.

Once I tell Sid what happened, she can’t believe it, either. She vows to get Todd any message I need, which I appreciate. Then again, it will be a little awkward to say what I really want to say to Todd through Sid.

Oh, well. I’ll take what I can get.

Chapter 11: The Aftermath

ASHLEY

It’s Monday morning, and I haven’t said one word to my parents since Saturday night.

I don’t think I have ever been this excited to go to school. I can’t wait to see Todd. Sid texted me and said he still doesn’t have his phone back, although his parents went out yesterday, so I got to talk to him on Sid’s phone. Just in case they are checking call histories, it would make sense if Sid called me. I wouldn’t put anything past our parents at this point, but luckily, I still have my phone.

Hearing Todd’s voice was incredible, but seeing him today is really what I need.

“Somebody is anxious to get to school,” Ryan says as he opens his car door.

“Yeah, yeah, just drive,” I answer as if he’s crazy, but it’s true. I have been sitting in his car for the last twenty minutes.

“Yeah, yeah,” he mocks as he pulls out of our driveway. “You talk to him this morning?”

“No. You?”

“No. Guess still no phone.”

“Mr. and Mrs. H. suck even worse than Mom and Dad. I can’t believe how much I hate them right now.”

Ryan doesn’t make a joke, only glances over with a sympathetic look. Then he takes a deep breath as his eyes meet the road again.

When we pull into the SL, I see Todd. He’s already here, leaning against his car and talking to Mark.

I swear, if it wasn’t for my seat belt or my brother sitting next to me, I would open the door and jump out while the car is still moving. But my parents would probably just blame Todd for any broken bones, and then we would never be able to see each other again.

As soon as Todd sees us, he comes over to Ryan’s car. Before I know it, I’m in his arms again and can finally breathe. Everything feels right with the world when his hands meet mine.

“I love you,” he whispers in my ear and then kisses me with so much passion I forget we are standing in the middle of the SL, surrounded by people. This kiss is full of everything I am feeling: hurt, pain, love, longing.

“Our parents made them break up,” I hear Ryan say, explaining the fact that neither of us are coming up for air. “Nothing to see here, folks,” I hear him say to passing students as he tries to block us with his body. Then MC joins in, and luckily, he’s a giant of a person, so he’s more successful than Ryan. Normally, Ryan would walk away, so he must really feel bad for us.

“Hamilton, you might want to get a room,” I hear Brian’s sarcastic drawl in the background, and then Blythe says, “What?” She sounds as appalled as I feel, so Ryan must be explaining what happened. None of this makes us separate, though.

I feel his hands slide over my arms and move down my back before they push through my hair. My lips are starting to get raw and burn, but I can’t stop, and I know Todd feels the same way.

“Teacher,” Ryan warns as he clears his throat. Then both Ryan and Mark say, “Teacher coming,” through coughs.

Todd must register it and what will happen if we get in trouble and have our parents called, because he abruptly pulls away. We both start to straighten out our clothes, and when I look up, I see Ryan, MC, Brian, and Blythe have made a human wall around us. This single act speaks volumes, and I know they have our backs.

Mrs. French passes our group, with just a nod and a smile. Phew.