I’ve spent more time than any girl should obsessing over a boy who hasn’t even kissed me yet. After considering forgetting everything that involves Ethan, I came to the conclusion that I’ll just go with whatever he has in mind. I’m not going to initiate anything, but I won’t say no if he brings it up. I like the way I feel when I’m around him. He opens doors, he makes me laugh, he’s got a bit of a romantic side to him, and he always smells good. He’s got a great smile and a great body, which is a huge plus. All the bad just disappears when I’m with him. Any stress I have is gone and nothing could make me happier. Unless, of course, he stops avoiding me. That would totally make me happier.

“Oh. You look amazing!” Sara squeals. She’s waiting impatiently by the door, wearing a red, ruffled dress that falls to her knees, with nude heels. Her blonde hair is straightened down her back, and she has a black clutch in her hands.

“You look amazing as well,” I tell her as we lock the door and walk outside. The BA is directly across from our apartment building. Beth, one of the other bartenders, lives in the apartment below us. We usually cut through the park when we walk to work, but not today. Heels and grass just don’t mix very well.

The entire place is full of people when we arrive. Most are here for Sara while others are regulars. Either way, her eyes begin to fill with tears at all the people who have come to see her off.

“It’s about time you showed up,” Logan hollers as he leaps up the steps to guide Sara to the bar. She waves over her shoulder at me as they walk away.

I recognize almost everyone here tonight, but one person stands out. I focus on each step I take to be sure I don’t fall in front of him. He approaches me too, staying calm and collected with a smile on his face. I wish I had that much confidence when it comes to me.

“Hey, Kelsey,” He leans in to speak into my ear over the music. “You look beautiful tonight.”

I blush.

“Thank you.” I’m obvious about letting my eyes take in the sight of him. Ethan has on a pair of dark blue jeans that fit him loosely, with a brown belt and a black button-down shirt he has tucked in. He looks stunning and I can’t hide the smile on my face.

“Do you want to get a drink?” he asks.

“Yes.”

He places his hand at the small of my back, leading me to the bar. My nerves are all over the place, and I already know I’m going to need more than one drink to make it through this night.

“You look stunning tonight.”

“Oh really, I’m shocked you noticed what with all the avoiding you’ve been doing lately.”

Ethan gazes at me from the corner of his eye before waving at Lucas. “Can I get a Bud and Kelsey will have a…” His left brow raises waiting for my response.

“Reds, please,” I say because I haven’t lost all my manners. Although he doesn’t really deserve any right now. I planned to come here and grab his attention. I never said I was going to be nice about it.

Lucas chuckles as he hands us our beers.

“Thanks,” I say, quickly stepping away, fully prepared to leave Ethan wanting more.

“I’m sorry, Kelsey.”

I stop. “You seem to be saying that a lot these days, Ethan, and you haven’t even been here that long.”

“I know, I just … I have a lot going on and I’m not sure how I want to deal with it.” He takes a drink from his beer, pinning his eyes on me. “I know what I want, but wants and needs are two very different things.”

My heart thumps louder. He’s never actually done anything to hurt me. But the way he’s acted isn’t a good sign. It’s not something I want to mess with. The way he said wants and needs makes me think he’s hiding something. And although I know I should stay away from him, a huge part of me wants to know what it is he won’t tell me, and deep down, I know that’s the part of me that’s going to win. It’s the part of me that’s willing to chance getting hurt again for Ethan.

Ethan

From the moment she steps through the door, Kelsey has my full attention. Her black dress is tight on her body, showing off every last curve and I love every moment of it. She looks beautiful and hot as hell, and there is no way I’m going to let any other guy in the place get near her.

I’ve been back and forth for what feels like a zillion times. Screw it all to hell and be with Kelsey, or stay away convincing myself it’s for the best? Right now, Kelsey is definitely weighing my decision toward option one. I can’t even look her in the eyes without my mind screaming, “Fuck it, just be with her.” Then I think about how far into helping my father I am and I freeze up. I have no idea what I should do.

“Dude, Sara looks smoking hot tonight, don’t you think?” Logan asks me. We’re leaning against the bar, resting back on our elbows as we watch the crowd. More specifically, the girls as they dance together on the dance floor, capturing everyone’s attention. My face wrinkles up and I feel like I’m going to be sick.

“Yeah, no…that’s my cousin. Nothing hot going on there, my friend.” I push myself off the bar, set my beer down, and then head for the dance floor. I watch Kelsey as she moves her hips to the song and laughs with my cousin.

I pause, debating my actions one more time, but one glance in my direction and everything that isn’t Kelsey disappears. She jumps when I come up behind her. My hands shake as they rest on her hips and she turns around slowly, wrapping her arms around my neck. She continues to move her hips from side to side until we have a rhythm together. I can’t imagine a moment when I’ve ever been happier than I am when I’m around her.

“It’s hard to do the right thing when what I want most is what I need most,” I say into her ear.

Her body stiffens. “It’s hot in here, right?” She fans herself with her hand, pulling away but leaving her hand in mine.

“Let’s go cool off,” I suggest, lacing our fingers and tugging her toward the bar where the crowd is thin. I lift my hand in the air to get Lucas’s attention and ask for two waters. He sets them in front of us and Kelsey immediately starts to chug hers. There’s a glow off her skin from hours of dancing, and her hair is now pulled up. She turns, leaning her left arm against the bar, and smiles up at me. I reach up to place a stray hair behind her ear.

“I have two things to say to you, Ethan Connelly,” She is slurring her words only slightly. I chuckle.

“And those are?”

“I just want you to kiss me already.”

I grin and lean closer. “The other?”

“I’m really glad Sara chose you to run her bar while she’s gone.”

And just like that, reality returns. When Kelsey finds out the real reason I’m here, she’ll hate me.

“Oh, you two are sooo cute.” Sara comes up quickly on Kelsey’s other side, almost running into the counter, then leans away from the bar, holding on with one hand to look around Kelsey to me. Logan comes up behind her to steady her. “It’s such a good thing your dad picked you to come help me and not one of your brothers,” Sara says, winking at Kelsey and looking back to me. “Before you know it, you’re going to be marking the schedule so all your shifts can be together. You better be a good boss to her, or Logan will beat you up.” She slurs a few of her words worse than Kelsey did, but I heard them.

Like clockwork, my phone buzzes in my pocket. Pulling it from my pocket, I glance down to see my father’s name. I excuse myself to use the restroom, but I don’t go there. Instead I leave. Until I figure out what I’m going to do and can stick with it, the farther away I am from Kelsey, the better. For both of us.

Chapter Fourteen

Kelsey

Sara’s been gone for a couple weeks and I’ve hated not having someone to talk to. Especially with the whole Ethan fiasco. I pretended like things were fine when she left because I don’t want her to worry.