He bit his lip. "I don't know how to say this, Jeff, so I am going to come right out and say it. You've been reported to the Executive Council for an honor code violation."

My entire body went cold. "What? Why? What did I do?"

"Look, I'm not supposed to be telling you any of this, okay? But the Executive Council met last night, and when break is over, they're going to call you in on Monday afternoon to determine whether or not to put you on trial before the entire Brotherhood."

"What am I supposed to have done?" Someone knows raced through my head, followed just as quickly by I knew I should have gone before the Brotherhood when I wanted to.

"I'm telling you all of this because I like you and think you have a lot to offer to the house." Marc went on like I hadn't said anything. "A lot more than Ted Norris, that's for goddamned sure. I can't believe he would do this to you after what happened during Inspiration Week-you'd think the little fuck would be grateful, but no! And just how he found out about you in the first place is what I would like to know. So, I think you should be prepared-it's only fair."

"Marc, I appreciate this." I felt lightheaded. "But what have I done?"

"There's a movie being advertised on the Internet, Pool Studs, or something like that. Anyway, there's a guy in this movie who looks just like you. They have lots of pictures of him on their website, and Ted showed it to the Executive Council." Marc patted my shoulder. "I'm sure it's just a coincidence-"

I started laughing. "No, it's no coincidence, Marc. No coincidence at all. It's me. I made that movie while I was in Palm Springs during winter break."

"Oh." He bit his lip, and I couldn't help wondering if he was thinking about that night during Little Sister Rush when I was a pledge. "You can always deny it, you know, stranger things have happened, you can just say the guy looks like you-"

"I have no intention of denying it, Marc." The initial panic was over, and I knew then that I was never going to deny who I was anymore. I felt remarkably calm. The decision had been made for me, and that was my only regret-I just wished I had been the one to decide when to tell the Brotherhood the truth. And of all people, to have Ted Norris be the one to out me to the Brotherhood. There was a kind of delicious irony there. Ted thought he was punishing me for some reason-getting even for slights during our pledge semester. I wasn't even angry at him. It was kind of funny in a way.

If he only knew he was doing me a favor! That was certainly going to take all the pleasure out of it for him, wasn't it?

"Are you sure you want to do that?"

"Marc, don't worry. I'm not going to expose you or what happened between us. That's between you and your conscience. But I'm not going to be another Ted and betray anyone else to the Executive Council." I folded my arms. "Unlike Ted, I believe in the ideals of the Brotherhood."

He reached out and shook my hand. "For what's worth, I won't vote to blackball you."

"Thanks, Marc."

I sat there staring at my computer screen for a while, and after a few minutes, I started laughing. Poor stupid Ted! He was probably all proud of himself-thinking he was bringing me down once and for all. He was in for a big surprise after spring break. The only question was how is Blairgoing to handle this?

The only thing I had, the only thing that was fair, was to be completely honest with him.

I told Blair on the drive down to Palm Springs.

"That miserable little son of a bitch!" Blair swore. "I'll kill him!"

"You don't need to, I'm actually glad this is all coming out, Blair," I replied. "Keep your eyes on the road! No, there isn't going to be a trial before the Brotherhood, Blair. When we get back, I am going before the Executive Council, tell them the truth, and resign from the house. I'm not going to fight this, I'm not going to lie about it, I'm not going to keep hiding who and what I am. And after I resign from the Brotherhood, I'm going to go tell my parents. And don't worry, I'm not going to out you to the Executive Council."

He was silent. After a few moments, he said, "You won't have to. I'm going in with you and resign as well."

My heart swelled with love and pride. "You don't have to"

"I know I don't have to, Jeff. I want to." He laughed. "Who wants to be a part of a house that would throw you out and keep fucking Ted Norris?"

"Please don't use the word fucking in conjunction with Ted Norris." I shuddered. "That's a mental image I don't want to have."

We both laughed, and that was the end of the discussion.

Spring Break was absolutely amazing. Blair and I had a blast, partying and meeting other out college kids. We had the most amazing sex, as well as our first three way with a hot guy from UCLA who belonged to a gay fraternity there. But even as each day passed, and the day of reckoning drew nearer, I felt freer. I was looking forward to that Monday, and it couldn't come fast enough for me.

And Monday afternoon, Blair and I walked into the President's office to meet with the Executive Council, holding hands. They all stared at us.

"Esteemed brothers," I said. "Brother Blanchard and I wish to request permission to address the Executive Council."

"Permission granted," Jake Beardsley, the current President, stated. He was still staring at our linked hands. He looked a little pale. I'd always liked Jake, even though I'd never really gotten to know him all that well.

I cleared my throat. "I am offering my resignation from the Brotherhood. I have violated the honor code of Beta Kappa by lying to the brotherhood. I have been lying to the brotherhood ever since I first accepted my pledge bid. I have never once outright told a lie, or answered a question with a lie, but rather have lied by not being honest about myself to the Brotherhood. I am a gay man. I am in love with Brother Blanchard, and we have been in a relationship since last summer, before I accepted my pledge bid. As such, I have no recourse other than to resign from the Brotherhood."

Jake's face went even paler, and his eyes bulged a bit. "Is this true, Brother Blanchard?" He managed to choke out, and I wondered what he had thought when Ted had come to them with his accusation.

"Yes, Brother Beardsley, it is true," Blair answered. "I too am offering my resignation."

"It saddens me to hear this," Jake cleared his throat, and looked around at the other members of the Council before continuing. "I don't think these honor violations require either of you to resign from the Brotherhood. I understand why the two of you might have felt the need to deceive the Brotherhood, and I can assure you that on my part, there was no need. My older brother is a gay man as well-and I feel that both of you are an asset to the house, assets that will be sorely missed. I move that we do not accept your resignations and rather put it to a vote by the entire Brotherhood at our meeting this evening."

"I second that," Marc said.

"Are there any objections?" When no one said a word, Jake said, "We will put it the Brotherhood tonight. You two are excused."

Back in Blair's room, we sat down together on the bed. "What do you think will happen tonight?" I asked. "It sounded to me like they'd already talked about it a lot-but they didn't expect us to come in there and be honest and admit to it. And in a way, it's kind of passing the buck by sending it to the whole Brotherhood in a way ... but then again, I guess-oh, I don't know." I took his hand. "No, it couldn't be decided by them. I want the entire Brotherhood to vote on it. I don't want anyone saying later they didn't have a say in it."