day they should reach Memphis. They would have to stop to

take on coal and it should be no problem to arrange to have

Silver Delaney taken by his own men, particularly since she

appeared more than eager to escape Savron.

Anticipation was a sharp pain within him as he turned away

and began to stroll down the deck toward the saloon.

Tomorrow. This goddamn charade was almost over. He had

only to wait one more day.

8

„Why are we having dinner in the stateroom?“ Silver asked as

she sat down opposite Nicholas at the damask-covered table.

She spread her napkin on her lap and dropped her lashes to

veil the hint of mischief in her eyes. „Have you decided I’m

not presentable enough to mingle with your other guests?“

„I decided I didn’t want every man at the table ogling you

and remembering what you looked like with nothing but a

wisp of cloth covering your privates,“ he said tersely. „I

haven’t forgiven you for that, Silver.“

„I didn’t ask for your forgiveness.“ She smiled at him. „I

think you’re just being selfish and don’t want to share the

raspberries with them.“

His frown faded and a reluctant smile touched his lips.

„That too.“ He looked down at his plate. „Talk to me.“

„What?“

„Tell me about yourself.“

She looked at him in puzzlement. „What do you wish to

know? I ve already told you what is important.“

„You’ve told me only that you’re a half-breed,“ he said

with barely leashed violence. „For God’s sake, that’s not the

only thing you are. You have a mind and a soul.“

„People aren’t usually concerned with anything else,“ she

said simply. „I know what I am inside but they don’t want to

see. You didn’t want to see either. You wanted only my body.“

Nicholas felt a sharp pang. What she said was true. He had

been so captivated with the challenge she presented, he had

disregarded everything else. „Well, I want to see now. Did you

like it at Mrs. Alford’s?“

„No, I hated it. They thought me savage, and I thought

them stupid. Even the lessons were stupid. Finger-painting and

needlepoint and how to curtsy. Rising Star taught me much

more from her books than any of those girls learned at the

academy.“ Her face lit with a reminiscent smile. „Rising Star

knew so much, she had many books and she was always

reading. She was far more clever than Mrs. Alford.“

„Her husband must have been very proud of her.“

Her smile faded. „Joshua? Joshua was ashamed because

she was an Apache.“ Her lips tightened. „He killed her.“

Nicholas’s gaze rose swiftly to her face. „Murder?“

„She was with child and he told her he did not wish it. She

rode away from Killara and died when her child was born.“

Her voice lowered fiercely. „She was strong. If she had wanted

to live…“ Her gray eyes were suddenly glittering with tears.

„She was gentle and kind but it made no difference. Her skin

was not white and they killed her for it. She told me once that

the way to live in a white man’s world was to take on his ways

and and become what he wished you to be. She was wrong.

No matter what she did, the Delaneys would not accept her as

one of them.“

The pain was naked in her face and he was experiencing a

reflection of her agony within himself. He tried to think of

something to distract her from that poignant memory. He lifted

his wine goblet to his lips. „Did you like nothing about your

schooling?“

She didn’t answer immediately, and it was evident she was

trying to gather her composure. „I learned to play the piano. I

love music.“ She made a face. „When I was first learning I

was terrible, and Mrs. Alford would come in and try to make

me stop. She said the noise was disturbing the other students.“

„But you wouldn’t do it,“ Nicholas guessed. „I knew I

would get better and I needed it.“ Nicholas could understand

how she needed something of her own to shelter her from the

loneliness and prejudice surrounding her, even if it were only

music. „What type of music do you prefer?“ She smiled

eagerly. „Everything. I like everything from folk songs to

Beethoven. It’s wonderful how music makes everything take

on beauty and sparkle. Do you like music?“

„Very much. I’d like to hear you play sometime.“ He

should have known Silver would take delight in music.

Anyone so sensual would naturally be attuned ,to the pleasures

of sound. „We have some fine young composers in Russia

now. I think you’d enjoy hearing their music. There’s a young

man named Rimsky-Korsakoff who shows great promise.“ He

looked down into the ruby-red depths of his wineglass. „St.

Petersburg can be very gay. Concerts, ballets, balls – “

„You’re trying to persuade me to go to Russia,“ Silver said

bluntly. „I told you I wouldn’t go. I leave Mrs. Alford’s shortly

and I intend to continue my studies.“

„What studies?“ Nicholas asked impatiently. „You’ve

already said you know more than the other women at the

academy. Perhaps you wish to perfect your skill at

needlepoint?“

„I’m going to go to a university and study medicine.“

„You intend to be a nurse?“

She stiffened. „I’m going to be a doctor.“

„Women do not become doctors,“ Nicholas said flatly.

„They do now.“ Silver set her plate aside and reached for

the crystal dessert bowl in which the raspberries were

swimming in rich cream. „Why should I be a nurse when I can

be a better doctor than most I’ve seen in the profession. It’s not

reasonable.“

„They won’t accept you at a university,“ Nicholas said

gently.

„I’ll find a way.“ Silver dipped her spoon into the

raspberries and met his gaze across the table. „Because I’m not

Rising Star, Nicholas. I won’t pretend to be what I am not and

I’ll let no one rob me of anything I choose to keep.“

There was no challenge in her expression, and Nicholas

realized that she was speaking with absolute sincerity. He

experienced a sudden thrust of pity mixed with respect and

admiration. Poor little firebird, she didn’t realize what a

difficult task she’d set for herself. Or perhaps she did and was

so accustomed to the struggle for acceptance that she could

perceive nothing different in this battle from the ones that had

gone before. „I could help you.“

She laughed with genuine amusement. „Instead of a house

and jewels, you’re going to buy me with an entry to a

university?“ She shook her head. „I wouldn’t take it from you.

I want the victory to be mine.“

He hadn’t thought of using his influence as a carte blanche.

He had wanted to help her and had made the offer impulsively.

My God, what was he thinking? He wanted Silver in his bed,

under his protection, not struggling in a university thousands

of miles away from him. Silver’s plan was all foolishness

anyway. She would be hurt and snubbed beyond anything in

her present experience. No, she’d be much better off under his

protection, where he could guard her from both the outside

world and herself. „Then it looks as if I’ll have to find a more

tempting prize to dangle before you,“ he said lightly. „Would

you consider a fine piano?“

„No, thank you.“

„Pity. Have you finished your dessert?“

She ate the last berry and set down her spoon. „Yes, why?“

„Because I’m about to seduce you and I wouldn’t dare

interfere with one of your primary pleasures.“ He stood up and

came around the table, pulling her to her feet and into his

arms. „Before offering one in its place.“ His head came down