Etaine’s illness gave her an air of fragility, almost a

transparency that was unbearably touching. „Sebastien!“

Sebastien paused at the entrance of the tent.

„Keep Monteith away from here tonight.“

He hesitated and for an instant she saw the fear that was

always present at any mention of defiance of Monteith. Then

Sebastien nodded with determination. „We’ll find a way.“

Khadil helped Silver undress and wrap Etaine in the

blanket and then sat back on her heels. „I have to leave now.

Monteith always checks the sideshow and my friends won’t be

able to fool him for much longer.“

„That’s fine, I won’t need you any more tonight,“ Silver

said. „Etaine is going to be fine.“

Khadil frowned, her eyes with their pink irises and red

pupils fixed worriedly on Etaine. „I’ll try to come back later if

you – “

„No.“ Silver tried to smother the exasperation she was

feeling. They all meant well, but their love for Etaine was so

deep that these attacks frightened them as much as they did the

child, and fear fed upon fear. „Leave us alone.“

Khadil nodded uncertainly, her wild mane of pure white

hair shining in the firelight. „Good night, Etaine.“

Etaine’s thin face was suddenly lit by a loving smile as she

gazed at the albino. „It’s… all right, Khadil. Don’t be…

afraid.“

„Hush.“ Silver motioned for Khadil to leave and settled

down beside Etaine, gathering the child into her arms. She

began to stroke the silky crop of fair curls, slowly and

rhythmically. They were silent for a long time, and Silver

gradually felt the tension that locked Etaine’s muscles begin to

ease and her breathing grow more steady.

„It’s getting better,“ Etaine said, nestling closer. „I was

afraid I…“

„It’s bad for you to be afraid. It makes the breathing much

worse. Now relax and think of pleasant things.“

„Heaven?“ Etaine tried to laugh. „I was wondering…

before you came… about heaven. I thought this time…“

„Not heaven,“ Silver said firmly. „You’re not going to see

heaven for a long, long time. You’ve had these attacks before,

and this is just another one. Maybe a little worse.“

Etaine nodded. „Worse. Why?“

Silver was silent a moment. „I don’t know, Etaine. I don’t

know why you have to suffer. Perhaps it won’t always be this

way. I have heard that some children grow out of lung

afflictions.“ If they lived long enough. The thought brought

panic in its wake, and she quickly blocked the emotion. She

mustn’t be afraid or Etaine would sense it and grow tense

again. She could often talk the child through attacks like these

if she could get her to relax. „A dry climate seems to help.

Doctors send many people to heal in the land where I was

born. Living here beside the river can’t be good for you.“

„We’ll move on… soon. My father says the pickings are

getting poor here.“

Silver experienced a swift thrust of pain. She had known

the circus would not remain here forever, but the news still

came as a shock. She would miss them all so much. Sebastien,

Khadil, Bruno the Strong Man, Etaine. No, not Etaine. She had

plans for Etaine.

„Tell me about Killara, Silver.“ Etaine’s lids had closed

again and her breathing was becoming less harsh with every

passing moment. „Tell me about your cousins… Patrick and

Brianne and about… Rising Star. Am I really like Rising

Star?“

„Yes.“ Silver gently stroked the blue-veined delicacy of

Etaine’s temples. „Not in appearance. My aunt was Apache,

like me, but you remind me of her.“ Strength and fragility,

gentleness and a joyous love of life that touched everyone

around her. „I miss her very much. She loved me.“

„Of course,“ Etaine said simply. „Everyone loves you,

Silver.“

Silver burst out laughing. „You’re mistaken, Etaine. I’m

not at all lovable.“

Etaine’s lids opened. „Then why do I love you?“

Silver gave the child a quick hug. „Because you love

everyone. Someday you’ll wake up and see me as I am.“

„I don’t love… everyone. Sometimes I feel very wicked.“

Silver knew to whom the child was referring. How the hell

could even a daughter love a monster like Paul Monteith?

„You’re not wicked. Some people aren’t worth loving.“ She

smiled down at her. „Do you think you can go to sleep now?“

„Pretty soon.“ Etaine’s breathing was almost normal now,

and her words were slightly slurred. „You won’t leave right

away? I always feel safe with you. I was so frightened before

when I couldn’t breathe.“

Silver swallowed to ease the tightness of her throat. „I

know, Etaine. I don’t have to leave for a long, long time. Now,

close your eyes.“

In a few moments the child was asleep and Silver let out a

deep sigh of relief. The attack was over. Tomorrow Etaine

would be weak and exhausted, but in a few days she would be

well again.

Until the next attack.

Silver knew a chill of terror that was quickly superseded by

determination. Etaine mustn’t be here when the next attack

occurred. She must be at Killara, where she could be cared for.

There had to be some way to get Monteith to relinquish

custody of Etaine. He had no affection for her. Hell, he had no

affection for anyone. She shivered as she remembered the last

confrontation she’d had with the man. There was something

terribly evil about Monteith, something not at all as it should

be…. She would wire Patrick and ask him for help. Mpnteith

appeared to be a greedy enough bastard; perhaps if Patrick

offered him a great deal of money…

She sighed wearily and tried to relax. Yes, perhaps Patrick

could help. Etaine would be happy at Killara, as Silver had

never been. She was a golden child and she would be accepted

by the family as one of them.

Her cousin, Patrick, had done everything he could to make

his grandfather and grandmother treat Silver as a true Delaney,

but he could not make them give her affection.

She had already resolved not to return to Killara, but the

ties that bound her to the ranch were too strong to sever

entirely. There were too many years, too many memories, too

many dreams invested in Killara to walk away from it and not

look back. Maybe she could settle somewhere close by and see

Etaine now and then, it would be sweet to watch her grow

strong and healthy and free of fear.

She was growing drowsy but she mustn’t sleep. The

carriage would return for her in a few hours to take her back to

the academy, and she had promised Patrick the last time she

had been expelled that she would try to avoid another scene

with Mrs. Alford. It was all very stupid. There were so many

foolish rules. How could any woman live smothered under so

many rules and with as many simpered platitudes ringing in

her ears? Still, she had promised. She wrinkled her nose in

distaste as she thought about having to sneak out each night.

Oh, well, three months more and it would be over. She would

be free.

She looked down at the child’s sleeping face and a wave of

tenderness swept over her. Now she must find a way of freeing

Etaine.

„Please, do be seated.“ Elisabeth Alford cast a flustered

glance at Mikhail Kuzdief towering behind Nicholas Savron

and moistened her lips with her tongue. „Perhaps your servant

could wait outside, your highness? My young ladies are shy

and easily frightened by the masculine gender and he is very…

large, isn’t he?“

Nicholas seated himself on the horsehair couch Mrs. Alford