“Seriously, Kyler, the ‘Thong Song?’ And when did you ever get a chance to get your hands on my phone?”

My arms dropped from him and I walked to where I’d set my purse down. Digging it out I looked at the screen, and saw it was Michael.

“Shit,” I whispered under my breath.

“What’s the matter?” Ky said from just over my shoulder.

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” I said, trying to clear the screen.

Ky must have seen it before I could clear Michael’s name. His mouth pressed into a firm line and his mood definitely shifted.

“Are you still seeing him?”

“What? No! We’ve gone out a few times but we’re not dating or anything. He was probably just calling to check up on me. He does that every now and then. Plus, he doesn’t even know I’m in New York.”

“Are you going to call him back?” Ky was mad, and I wasn’t sure I liked it.

“I don’t know. I might. Does it matter?” I leveled a glare at him.

He breathed in through his nose and spoke. “Of course it matters. You’re here with me, Harper. I won’t share you. When you go home, I want it known that you are my girl. That means no more Michael.”

That pissed me off. We’d never agreed to be in a monogamous relationship. I came out here so he could show me the city. I know he’d said he wanted to prove that we could be good together—and it had been very good over the past two days—but I would not be told what to do. I never had and I never would. My temper was flaring and I pushed back.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do, Kyler. Just because I came out here to see you, doesn’t mean we are automatically with each other and I’m proclaiming my undying love. That’s not what this trip was about.”

He turned his back towards me and dragged his hands through his hair. “Fuck,” was all he said.

I felt bad that the moment we had shared had been ruined by Michael’s phone call, but maybe it was a good thing. Kyler needed to know where he stood with me. Although, if you’d asked me where that was, I wasn’t so sure I could answer at that very moment. Needing to calm the situation, I reached out and touched his arm.

“Listen, I’m sorry that he called. There’s nothing going on between Michael and me. He’s a nice guy and that’s all there is to it. I won’t call him back if that makes you feel any better, but I will send him a quick text to tell him where I’m at so he doesn’t go knocking on my door back at home.”

I saw his shoulders rise and fall as he took a deep breath. He turned to face me again and the look in his brown eyes showed hurt. It made my heart ache.

“I know I don’t own you, Harper. I’d like to have you solely for myself, but I know you have a life outside of this little world we’ve created during these two days. If you want to call him, that’s fine.” He paused, then leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead. “Listen, I’m really beat. I think I’m going to get some shuteye. Make sure you get some rest, we have a busy day tomorrow.”

With that he turned and walked into his room. Why did it bug me that he’d just walked away from me? I was just pissed off that he was trying to stake his claim on me, but now that he wasn’t standing right in front of me, I felt like that was exactly what I wanted. I groaned and walked down to my room, frustrated at myself and my contradicting emotions.

I sent Michael a quick text to tell him I was in New York, and he sent one right back asking if I was there for work. I told him I was there with Kyler for the week. He didn’t respond after that. Part of me felt guilty, as if I was playing two different guys, but really Michael and I had never defined our relationship. He took me out every once in a while and he had turned into my fuck buddy. I know that didn’t make me sound good but again, I’d always been clear with him that we would never be more.

I walked into my room, and after I’d washed my face, I changed into a camisole and boxer shorts. My mind kept replaying what had happened that evening and it was wearing me out trying to sort out my feelings. I decided a call to Em was in order—after all, she knew me best. While I lay in bed, she told me what she thought of the day, the call from Michael, and Ky’s reaction towards it. She reminded me that I owed it to myself and to Kyler to be open to him while I was here. After I hung up the phone I stared up at ceiling, trying to feel at peace with how I handled everything. I ended up falling asleep pretty quickly and had a repeat dream of my father leaving me alone in bed and the feeling of desolation.

Kyler and I had a quiet morning. He didn’t seem up to talking very much and was clearly still thinking about my phone call from Michael. I wanted to reassure him, but decided not to. He needed to trust me. We weren’t officially together, and I didn’t feel that I owed him an explanation. Call me a bitch, but he could stew on it for a while.

Around noon we decided to go for a walk in Central Park. It was a sunny, fall day, and the air was crisp and cool. I’d needed a light jacket, but Ky also tucked me into his side, keeping me warm. The park was beautiful—the movies and pictures didn’t do it justice. There were so many different spots to see and explore. We fed the ducks that floated on a small pond, watched performers sing, and another person spray-paint canvases while dancing. I’d never seen anything like it before. New York City was a world in itself. When we’d walked through a bit of the park, Ky suggested that we go to Times Square to do the tourist thing and buy as much expensive knick-knack shit as we could get our hands on. I laughed at the idea, but went along with it. Times Square was almost overwhelming. People crowded the streets, bumping into each other on every side. Lights were on the sides of the buildings, advertising new movies, underwear ads, and anti-gay campaigns. I didn’t even know where to look, or if I’d ever be able to see everything.

Ky tugged my arm and pulled me through the crowd. We went into so many stores, buying things like plastic snow globes with the city skyline, magnets, t-shirts that said “I {MISSING SYMBOL} NYC”, and a really stupid Statue of Liberty thing that when you pressed the bottom of it, it crumpled down and when you released the button, it stood back up.

We walked and walked, until we couldn’t walk anymore. We took a cab back to the hotel and ordered room service for dinner. Ky had to leave in a few hours to go to Levi’s birthday party and I was feeling a little … uneasy about it. He’d be at a strip club, and I seriously didn’t care for the idea of some other chick’s tits being smashed in his face.

“Harper, I’ll stay in the back by the bar and they won’t even notice me,” he said, trying to make me feel better.

It was a sweet gesture but hadn’t I scolded him yesterday for doing the same thing to me and Michael? It wouldn’t be fair for me to ask him to not have fun with his band mates just because I was acting jealous. No, I’d ignore my crazy-ass feelings and tell him that it was fine.

“I’d never ask that of you and besides, I want you to have fun.”

“What are you going to do while I’m gone?”

“I think I’ll ask one of the hotel pedicurists to come up to the room and paint my toes, then maybe catch a movie. It’ll be relaxing.” I didn’t know if I’d sounded convincing, but he watched me intently, before nodding his head.

“Well, please don’t think you have to stay up for me. I’ll try not to stay late, but the guys will do everything to keep me there.”

“Ky, go, have fun. I’ll be here when you get back.”

As he got ready, my nerves were getting the better of me. Right before he left, I decided that I couldn’t just sit in the room and think about him looking at a bunch of naked women. What if he liked what he saw? What if the women liked what they saw? Holy fuck, what was I talking about? Ky was the most gorgeous guy I’d ever seen … of course they would like what they saw! I couldn’t have that—I’d go out of my mind wondering what was going on at that club.