‘I like mine black,’ I say with a smile, and bring the cup to my lip.

I watch her cut a slice of carrot cake and put it on a plate. It looks moist—crumbs fall onto the china. I look at the walnuts embedded in it and consider telling her that I have a nut allergy, and then I realize I want to try her cake. Perhaps it will be lousy. She comes around the island and places the cake in front of me. I break a tiny bit off and pass it into my mouth. It is freaking delicious. Sweet and oily. The way everything should be. Is there nothing that this woman will not do well?

‘Well?’ she asks, popping herself on the stool next to mine, a huge slice of cake on her plate. ‘Do you like it?’

‘Delicious,’ I say, truthfully. She smiles at me warmly and I smile back.

I break off another small piece.

‘You remind me,’ she says, ‘of those French actresses in the black and white movies that my mother used to watch. They used to break off minute pieces from their bread rolls or baguettes or whatever they were eating and slip them daintily into their mouths too.’

‘Really? You used to watch black and white movies?’ How boring. I break another piece.

‘Sometimes. They were classy.’

We sit quietly for a minute, both sipping our tea.

‘What do you do all day?’ I ask.

‘Well, Billie and I were planning to set up a baby clothes business.’

I nod. Ah, that would explain the colorful drawings I found in Billie’s place.

‘But,’ she carries on, ‘I realized that it would be a total waste of my time. The reason people take up jobs that they hate or start a business is to earn money. I have more money than I could possibly spend. I am in the process of starting a children’s charity. I’ll start in Britain but eventually it will be a worldwide organization. I’m calling it CHILD. I have to be careful, though. I don’t want it to be like the other charities where so little actually gets to the intended recipients.’

She’s right there. I just read that Lady Gaga’s charity took in over two million and paid out one grant for five thousand dollars while hundreds of thousands were squandered on expenses.

She turns slightly away from me to look at the clock on the wall and I break a large piece of cake off and, with my hand under the counter, squeeze it into a ball in the palm of my left hand.

‘Can I use your bathroom?’

‘Of course. There is something wrong with the toilet in the cloakroom. Just use the one in my bedroom. Do you still remember where it is or do you need me to show you?’

‘No, no, I remember.’

‘OK,’ she says, and forks another piece of cake into her mouth.

I go into her bathroom and flush the cake down the toilet, wash my hands quickly, and go back into her bedroom. Her laptop is open, but the screen has gone dark. I go to it and tap the mouse pad. The screen opens to an odd sight. It is a website about sex magick and secret cults! What the…? Huh?

I read the first paragraph of something titled The Emerald Tablets.

“Far in the past men there were who delved into darkness, and using

dark magick called up beings from the great deep below us. Forth came

they into this cycle, formless were they, existing unseen by the children

of earthmen. Only through blood could they become, only through

man could they live in the world.”

Dark magick? Beings from the great deep below us? Formless ones? Blood rituals! What the hell is Lana doing on a crazy site like this? There is a notebook open by the laptop. I recognize Lana’s handwriting. I scan through it.

The brotherhood of El

El =Saturn

The worship of Saturn is the oldest secret religion.

Their symbol – the one eye

Why is the one eye symbol on the American dollar bill??

Symbols are perceived by humans on a subconscious level.

Is that why modern media and the entertainment industry is filled with one-eye symbols? Are celebrities flashing it without realizing its true meaning and what they are communicating to the public or are they puppets?

The occult symbols and imagery are everywhere, in movies, television, music and fashion, but human beings are totally blind to them.

The first and most important tenant of initiation into almost all cult sex magick is the sodomizing of children!!!! Sodomy and pedophilia is the foundation of the whole thing!! Goes back to Nimrod and the Egyptian initiations.

CANNOT

proceed to the next level without this step.

Blake’s dad!

Child sacrifice is a worldwide phenomenon. Every culture has at some point in history stooped to it.

Why?

Is there a long-term agenda? An unseen hand?

Who are the children of the shadows? What do they want with us?

Need more answers. Can’t find! Who to ask?

I can make no sense of her notes. Why is Lana doing research on sex magick and such dark subjects as child sacrifice? Why is Blake’s dad mentioned in the notes? And the sodomizing of children! Why is she interested in such an unspeakably horrible subject?

I run to the door and hurry down the corridor. In the kitchen Lana’s slice of cake is almost gone and she is sipping her tea.

‘Finish your cake,’ she says. ‘We should be going or we’ll be late for our appointment.’

I sit down, my mind racing. I eat the rest of the cake without tasting it.

We have just got into the car when Blake calls. I can tell by the way her voice softens and becomes all giggly. I find it hard to marry up this love-struck girl/woman with the dark research I found on her laptop. If this is a mask she is wearing then it makes me determined to find out what is really going on. When she terminates the call I ask her if there will be paparazzi at the wedding.

‘No, Blake has had the area designated as a no fly zone. It is just for close friends and family.’

‘How come you’re not having a bridal shower?’

‘I guess because I don’t want my friends to shower me with gifts. I already have everything I could possibly want!’

Wow! How amazing to be able to say that. ‘What about a hen night? Don’t you want one of those?’

‘Blake doesn’t want to have a stag night and even though he’s cool with me having a night out with the girls I hate leaving him at night. I see so little of him as it is.’

‘Why doesn’t Blake want a stag night?’

‘He says stag nights are a form of consolation for men who feel they are sacrificing a cherished state for the sake of love. He knows he is sacrificing nothing.’

‘He works really hard, doesn’t he?’

‘Yes, very.’

‘I thought rich people spent all their time quaffing champagne and caviar and going to the opera.’

‘Blake’s father didn’t want his children to be trust fund kids. They were taught that even the greatest empire can be brought to its knees if the king and his favorites are sunk in luxuries and dissolution.’

Something flashed in Lana’s eyes when she mentioned Blake’s father. What, I do not know…yet.

Tom drops us outside Selfridges and Lana takes me to a make-up counter where an Asian girl smiles politely at me. Lana introduces us.

‘Go on, work your magic,’ Lana says. ‘I’ll be back in half an hour.’

First Aisha takes a photograph of me.