“A lot of people feel that same way. You always want to be the one handling your life, not the other way around. That’s why you come here. So you can find better ways to do it.”

“Yeah, but I have to give credit where it’s due. My friend Emma is the one who hit on the fact that I’m an adrenaline junkie. If we could’ve puzzled that out, say, a year or two ago, I might’ve been ramping up my sex life much sooner than this.” Marianne chortled so loud that Piper blinked. “Did you just snort-laugh at me?”

Her therapist was slightly overweight with steel-gray hair worn long and natural when many women over sixty cut theirs short and dyed it. “I did.” She looked pleased with herself. “Piper, we’ve discussed your need for adventure almost daily since the very first time you arrived on my doorstep. That rush you feel during sex, and seeing others have it—that’s an adrenaline high. It’s never been anything else. We’ve even discussed how it acts like a drug on your system.”

Piper was genuinely baffled. She blinked. “Then how come it took me so long to figure it out?”

Marianne shrugged. “Because you weren’t ready. You still carry fear around with you like a security blanket—fear that you won’t be able to handle the emotional pain that might come with the pleasure. But this time, because you heard it from someone other than me, you listened. I think that’s very telling.” She held up a single finger before Piper could add her two cents. “And it makes me realize that it might be time for us to scale back our weekly meetings and for you to use your girlfriends for guidance. I’m afraid they might be able to help you more than I can now.”

“You want to stop our sessions?” Piper opened and closed her mouth, but nothing more came out.

“Of course I don’t want to see you go. But that’s because I enjoy you, not because you need to be here. You bring joy and light to my day, but a good therapist knows when they are no longer of service. Piper, it’s time for you to start seeing your sexual issues in a new light. Unfortunately, it’s not one that I can shine for you. I’ve tried for years, but you almost never take my advice.” She chuckled. “You are so very stubborn.”

“I’ve just been trying to protect myself,” she said. It came out defensively. “It comes across as stubborn, I know it does, but it’s really just self-preservation at its finest.”

Marianne nodded. “That might be true, but I saw the fear ebb in your eyes when you shared with me today. More than I want to keep our sessions, I want you to stay on that track. You don’t need to be frightened of having another breakdown. You’re a strong-minded woman who’s in charge of her life. You aren’t going to make the same mistakes you did all those years ago. You can afford to let loose and be happy, and once you do, you will consistently find the fulfillment that has been alluding you. I promise you.”

“That could happen,” Piper agreed reluctantly. “But I’m also fully capable of making the same mistakes I did before. I am a creature of habit, you know. And what will I do if that happens?”

“If you need me, I’ll always be here.”

“Fine.” Piper crossed her arms. “But I’ll probably be calling you in two weeks.”

“Then I’ll be here.” Marianne folded her hands in her lap. “But you’re not going to need me. You’ll see.”

* * *

“My therapist kicked me out. Now this!” Piper’s voice was animated, but that might be because of the wine. She should have felt more uneasy about Marianne letting her go, but instead she felt exuberant.

They were sitting in Caroline’s kitchen for their weekly STD meeting. Piper held up her phone to show Caroline the e-mail. Then she turned it around and read it out loud. “It says my boss wants to see me bright and early tomorrow morning. He signed it with his full name.” She giggled. “I can’t wait to hear what he has to say about the scandalous Pantygate. The security guards had to have told him I was in the building.”

Caroline picked up a piece of sushi and took a bite. “I still can’t believe you left the panties in there. You have no shame whatsoever, you know that?” She wiped her mouth with a napkin.

“It had nothing to do with shame and everything to do with rocking my libido. Those panties have given me hours upon hours of titillation. For ten bucks, that’s a helluva bang for my buck. And when I say bang, I mean bang.” She angled both index fingers below her waist. “Bang, bang.”

“You crack me up. But I know what you mean,” Caroline said between giggles. “Sometimes I wish I had your kind of balls, but that’s not me. My inner cringe factor would rear its ugly head, and I’d feel guilty about every bit of it, from dirtying up a public table, to traumatizing the poor geek who found your hidden undergarment.”

“Nah. You wouldn’t feel guilty,” Piper said. “Not after some backbone training from me. Plus, I think you’re ballsy enough. You aren’t afraid to go out and get what you want. I, on the other hand, talk big, but when push comes to shove, I totally check out.”

“You check out only because you’re scared, but that’s changing as we speak. I think it’s fantastic that Ms. Cummings—” Caroline covered her mouth. “My Lord, that name gets me every time. I’m glad she stopped your sessions. You’ve been going to her for what? Eight years? It’s time to change things up.” Caroline held her glass aloft. “Here’s to new adventures and great sex.”

Piper clinked her glass with her friend’s and picked up a sushi roll. Caroline had ordered out for tonight’s meeting. “It’s easy for you to say,” Piper said, popping the roll into her mouth. When she finished chewing, she washed it down with some wine. “Because you’re all well-rounded and normal. I’m the one who needs outside help.”

“I need help, too. I’ll always need help. If my mama knew about my sex life, she’d have me locked up under twenty-four-hour guard. But I’ve been thinking about what you said about Emma helping you and her joining our group.” Caroline bit her lip. “And I’m okay with it. If you want to ask her, go ahead. We can both use her guidance, right? She’s been in the lifestyle much longer than we have, and would definitely add something. Jace and I decided we’re not interested in being with them again. If it comes down to another couple, we want new blood.” Caroline grinned. “Or should I say new cock?”

“Caroline Stratton”—Piper covered her mouth so she didn’t spit seaweed and rice all over the table—“you are getting ballsier! And I like it, I do. But every time you say something incredibly dirty, I blush on the inside for you.” Piper chuckled. “You’re so proper, it’s like you’re breaking some kind of nice law when you swear.”

“No need to blush for me. I am getting bolder, but it’s because I’m finally feeling comfortable in my own skin. And that’s thanks to you, my dear friend. These get-togethers have made me feel stronger. More than you know. Working from home feels like purgatory sometimes. I don’t see or talk to anyone else. I have all the time in the world to dwell on the questionable stuff I’ve done and it makes me feel, I don’t know, judged somehow? Does that make sense? Meeting with you every week erases all that and makes me feel normal again—until the next time I feel like getting super dirty.” She politely snorted, then took a sip of her wine. “But the I’m-going-to-hell thoughts are less and less, thank goodness. I’m reaching a peaceful acceptance of myself.”

“That’s fantastic,” Piper said, genuinely happy for her friend. “Okay, I’ll ask Emma to join us. I’m sure she’d be into it, and I think she is going to be a great addition. I’m also having lunch with Gillian next week. Maybe we should invite her, too?” Piper raised an eyebrow as she refilled her wine glass.

Caroline picked up a sushi roll and dipped it in soy sauce. “Yes, the mysterious Gillian. You’ve never really talked about her. Why is that?” She popped the roll into her mouth.