“You’re going to . . . The town isn’t like a television small town.” She’d gotten very quiet when they’d approached Happy Bend.

“I’m going to what?”

“Be horrified. I am. It was a shithole then; I imagine it’s worse of a shithole now.”

“Be that as it may, it has nothing to do with you. You have nothing to be ashamed of.”

“Says the guy who grew up with a view of Lake Washington out his window every morning before he went to private school.”

“Yes, I did have those things and I’m grateful for them. And yet, it has no bearing on you, or how I feel about you.”

“I hate when you’re calm when I’m being a dick.”

He laughed. “I know, beautiful, that’s why I’m doing it.”

“I knew it! Needling me to get me riled up.”

“You’re hot when you’re riled up.” And she wasn’t thinking too much on the mess they were about to face.

“Get off here. Head east when you get to those railroad tracks.”

He followed her directions, getting farther and farther from the main roads.

“Pretty countryside around here.” Lots of trees and green stuff.

“Yeah, that’s one thing.”

“Hey, it’s going to be fine. I’m here. Always. Okay?”

She blew out a breath. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been here.”

“You have a home now. In Seattle. This is just a place you did some shitty years of your life when you had no other choice. It formed who you are now, but it doesn’t need to have any more power over you than it already does. I know this is easy for me to say. But I believe in you, Raven. I know you better than any of these assholes ever will. You’re worth a thousand of them. No matter how hard they tried to fuck you over. No matter why.”

“Don’t make me cry again or I’ll be mad.”

He turned his attention back to the road.

“About two miles or so. There’ll be, or there used to be, a gas station at a crossroads. Country Road Fourteen. Go right.”

She hadn’t lied about how horrible the place was. Rusted-out cars and farm equipment overgrown by weeds and berry bramble. The houses were run-down. It was more than poverty; he’d seen plenty of that. It was that the place seemed to have a dearth of hope.

“Go up to Copperhead and take a right.”

There was a tiny grocery store with a few cars in the parking lot. A post office.

“One stoplight. But we have a post office.”

He followed the directions.

“Up there. The white house with the blue truck in the driveway. That’s my aunt’s place.”

He turned around and parked so they could easily leave when the time came. She was pale, but otherwise holding it together.

“You don’t have to do this, you know.”

“I do. Now come around and open my door like a gentleman.”

He grinned and kissed her quickly. “I love you.”

She shook her head, wearing a confused smile. “I know and I really don’t know why. But I love you too. So there’s that.”

He got out and opened her door. She wore jeans and a sweater with some sneakers. Nothing fancy. She’d said if she’d worn a dress her aunt would have accused her of putting on airs or thinking she was too good.

He kept a hand on the small of her back as they walked up to the front porch. A woman appeared there, one who bore a strong resemblance to Lena.

“What do you want?”

“Hello, Aunt Lorene.”

The older woman peered through the screen door with a start. “Raven?”

“Yes. This is Jonah. I’d like to talk to you.”

Suspicion was already on her face and it only doubled. She didn’t open the door.

“You do? What about then?”

“Wouldn’t you rather take this inside instead of on the porch?” Jonah asked smoothly.

Raven wanted to laugh because the situation was so ridiculous she had to. But she kept it together.

“You’re just fine where you are. Why are you here?”

“I’ve been to Oklahoma City. To see my mother.”

Even through the screen door Raven noted how much more pale her aunt got.

“Why did you lie? To me and to her?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Sure you do. You told me she had died. Of a drug overdose. You told me she died in the gutter.”

She clenched her fists and reminded herself she was better than her instincts. Better than the desire to rip that door off the rusty hinges and beat the hell out of this woman who’d harmed her so much. “And then you told her I’d been murdered. Me, instead of poor Missy Thompson. She tried to kill herself multiple times after that. I know you know that. Why?”

“I don’t have to say anything to you.”

Raven took a step closer. “No, you don’t. But you will because you owe me that much. You made this mess and you’ll tell me why.”

“I did it for your own good.” Lorene’s voice was small, petulant.

“Come again?”

“She couldn’t take care of you. She done left you how many times? It was best that you just stopped believing she’d come back and save you. You needed to accept your place in life and you wouldn’t until you had no other options.”

Jonah put an arm around her, restraining her, but also comforting her.

“My place in life? What place is that?”

“She thought she could go off to the city and be something else. But she was a country girl born and bred. She thought she was better than all her kin and look where it got her!”

“Look where your behavior got me! I never lived in a single place longer than six months from the time I was three until I was fourteen years old. I was raped. I was beaten up. Not a single person but Mama Eula ever told me I was loved. How is that my place?”

“Reaching above yourself would only bring you heartache.”

“I ate heartache breakfast, lunch and dinner for years of my life. Years.”

“I didn’t know about your cousin. I didn’t know he’d hurt you. I just . . . Do you want to be like her? Like me?”

Raven scrubbed her hands over her face. “Like her how?”

“You ran off too.”

“I did, and by God, it was hard. It was lonely and hard. It’s been lonely and hard for a long time. But I got away and things did get better.”

“She never could take care of you. All she did was make you sad.”

“It wasn’t her fault! She’s mentally ill. Chemicals in her brain. What’s your excuse?”

Lorene stepped back like Raven had slapped her. “I never had any kids. I saw it with my aunt too. With my sister. With our momma. I think, when I was about seventeen and I had a burst appendix, they tied my tubes. It was for the best. So I couldn’t pass it on.”

None of this was what she’d expected.

“You’re telling me you were sterilized without your permission because mental illness runs in the family?”

“Your precious Mama Eula! She knew it could happen to me like it happened to your mom. So she agreed to have it done. She told me later it was for my own good.”

“How long, Lorene? How long are we going to keep secrets? No one should have done that to you. You were seventeen.”

“Couldn’t have afforded any babies no how. Never did find myself a decent husband. What did I have to offer any kid? Look what I did to you.”

“You didn’t have to! You could have taken me in. You didn’t have to tell me my mother had died. You didn’t have to tell her I’d died. I don’t understand. Why do you hate me so much? What have I ever done to make you all hate me so much?”

It was only Jonah’s arm around her shoulders that kept her from crying. That kept her from falling to her knees and weeping for all the lies, for all everyone had lost, and for what?

“I don’t hate you, child. I never did. You was a beautiful little girl. Smart. But that sort of thing gets a woman picked on in our world. Toughening you up was a favor. Can’t you see that? You get to be eighteen and you’re a tough old bitch and you won’t get beaten up by life. You won’t get pregnant at fourteen like your momma did. This is a hard life we got here. Pretty girls don’t last long. I did what I knew to do.