“Thank you,” she whispered, her eyelashes fluttering to her cheeks. “I’m so tired. So very, very tired.”
* * * * *
“Hey Maggie, have you seen Mark?”
“He went out for a bit, but I don’t know where.” She studied Lindsey’s face. “That black eye is really looking better now.”
Lindsey touched the spot under her left eye. “Yes, finally. Now it sorta looks like a bad birthmark.”
“Gives the rest of us females a chance for once,” Maggie said with a playful smile.
Lindsey snorted. “Right. You too funny.”
Mark rounded the corner. “What trouble are you two cooking?”
Lindsey laughed. “That’s for us to know and you to find out.”
Mark moved forward, aware that his pulse was beating rapidly, tension lacing his body. He had something important to tell Lindsey. “Come to my office, and let me try and pry it out of you.”
Lindsey laughed and followed Mark. Once they were in his office, Mark pushed the door shut and pulled her into his arms. “I have ways to make you talk.”
Lindsey unbuttoned his jacket and dipped her hands beneath it. “Please, make me talk.”
“Actually, there is something I need to talk to you about.” He took a step backwards, taking her hand in his. “Come sit with me.”
Mark pulled the chairs around so that he could face her. He’d taken a big step. One meant to help Lindsey let go of the past. He could only pray it was the right move. He loved her. He had no question he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.
Lindsey touched his cheek. “What’s up?”
He let out a breath. “I’ve given a lot of thought to you and me, and to the firm.” Her eyes widened. “I know you don’t want to run Paxton, and I came back on a limited timeline.”
Lindsey nodded. “I know, and I appreciate what you have done for me.”
Mark smiled, thinking of how things had changed between them. He wanted her to let go of the past. To choose to be with him out of desire, not pressure to run Paxton. “You have a job waiting for you in Washington.”
Her voice was almost a whisper. “Yes, but you have a consulting business to get back on track.”
“If I leave, it’ll force you to take over, and then you’ll resent me. I can’t deal with that.” And he couldn’t. It would destroy any hope they had of a future.
Her eyes clouded. “But it’s not fair for you to stay and miss out on your own business. I understand if you need to leave.”
He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. Better to just get it all on the table. “I made an offer to buy Paxton, and this time your father accepted.”
Lindsey blinked, her expression dumbfounded. “What?”
He nodded. “I don’t want you to leave, but deep down I know you don’t want to stay. To have you practice law here at Paxton, by my side, would make me very happy. But it would be selfish. I care enough about you to want you to be happy.”
Lindsey stood up and walked to the window, placing her back to Mark. “So this is goodbye,” she said without turning.
It took every ounce of willpower he possessed not to go to her. “I hope not. I want you to stay. But I can’t kid myself. You left this place once, and when you returned you never intended to stay. I can’t win either way things go.”
Lindsey stared out, her voice shaky as she spoke. “You should have talked to me.”
“Maybe,” he admitted, “but I have thought about this until it felt I might go nuts. This was the only way I could make the choice yours. Now you have options. Stay or go, but follow your heart.”
He heard her draw in a breath before turning around to face him. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Say what you feel.”
“You’re a good man, Mark.”
Mark tried to smile, but failed. Her eyes were distant, her body stiff. His heart felt like it was being shattered into pieces. A good man. Not good enough, it seemed. He’d so hoped she would come to him. That she would choose a life with him. “You’re a free woman, Lindsey.”
Then afraid of what he might say next, he pushed to his feet, and strode out of the room. He had never needed air as badly as he did at that moment.
Chapter Fourteen
Three Months later
Lindsey slipped through the doors of the elegant New Yorker Museum feeling apprehension from the top of her head clear down to her freshly manicured toes.
Already her father’s retirement party was in full swing. The dance floor was filled, the tables packed. He’d made an amazing recovery, her father, nothing shy of a miracle. And Lindsey had been talking with him on the phone a lot. He’d even made amends with Mark, often talking about the great things he was doing with the firm. His turnaround was baffling, but welcome. As daughter and father, they were on the mend, and for that she was thankful.
But there was still one person she needed to connect with.
Mark.
She’d spent three long months in Washington, away from him, missing him every minute. Every day she hoped he would call. But he didn’t. She’d dialed his number too many times to count, and then hung up at the last minute.
Her nightmares hadn’t gone away. The dark images still woke her in the night, leaving her shaken and scared. But now she understood them. They’d never been about the murders. They were about her fear. About losing herself, her life, and her love . . . Mark.
Lindsey handed her coat to a checkperson, and eyed the room, looking for Mark as discreetly as she could. Her hand smoothed her black satin slip dress, nervous about looking her best. She’d dressed with care, taking extra time to fix herself, wanting to look her best.
She’d come to a life-altering decision. She could only hope it wasn’t coming too late. Mark was the love of her life, and she wanted to be with him. Nerves were jangling through her entire body as if she were a schoolgirl with a crush.
Taking several deep breaths, she took a moment to take in her surroundings. She had always loved the Museum, and a moment to explore its beauty would help take her outside of her anxiety. Lindsey had spent hours on the phone with Maggie planning the party. It was exciting to see how beautifully it all had come together. Surveying the room with pride, Lindsey took in the high ceilings and the dim lighting. The setting was elegant, the music soft and soothing, the tables of food delectable, even from a distance.
She sucked in a deep breath, and willed herself to step forward. She’d barely taken two steps when Maggie found her. “Lindsey,” she said with a warm smile and big hug. “We’ve missed you.”
Lindsey hugged her back, feeling the words with more emotion than expected. “It’s good to be missed.”
Maggie pulled back. “Have you seen Mark yet?”
Lindsey nodded apprehensively. Maggie, angel that she was, had made a point of filling her in on Mark on a regular basis. Lindsey never asked, but she darn sure listened. And Maggie was no fool. She knew Lindsey hung on every word.
“No, not yet. I just got here.”
Maggie surveyed Lindsey, stepping back and inspecting her appearance. “His eyes will pop out when he sees you in that dress, sweetie.”
Lindsey tried to smile, but she didn’t quite make it. “We’ll, see,” she said, and changed the subject. She was getting more nervous by the minute. “The party’s lovely. You did a wonderful job.”
“We did a wonderful job,” she corrected. “Come,” she said with a nod of her head. “Let’s go see your father.”
Together they maneuvered through the crowd, making their way across the room. Lindsey kept an eye out for Mark, but to her disappointment, he was nowhere in sight. Her father’s table was near the front of the room. Lindsey saw him before he saw her, which gave her a moment to digest his incredible transition. He’d put on a good fifteen pounds, and his color was healthy, his smile happy.
The minute he spotted Lindsey, his eyes lit up and he pushed to his feet. Maggie grabbed Lindsey’s arm to gain her attention. “I better circulate. Catch up to you in a few.”