“I want you to read me this.” My voice shook with trepidation.  The color drained from his face as he took in my words.

“Eden, please don’t make me.” Ky begged in a voice that shattered like glass. He started to rise from his desk, his eyes locked to mine. I shook my head dismissively, and he immediately sat back down in defeat.   I tore my eyes away from his, dropping my gaze to the floor and inhaled deeply. My emotions bounced all over the place as I tried to comprehend everything around me. I had a man sitting completely defeated in front of me, I had a heart that had finally opened to the idea of love by the same man and a lie was now clouding my opportunity to begin again.  I finally found my confidence and lifted my head and looked at him. His gaze held strong though he looked completely shattered. I took him in as he was; strong, protective, passionate, and now drowning in reluctance.

I moved across the room until I stood beside the desk. My hands shook with nerves when I held the envelope out.

Ky’s eyes darted between me and the letter. “Do you really want me to do this?”

“I need you to do this Ky.”

“For you, I’d do anything,” he whispered, and with a nervous hand he took the envelope from me.

He slid his index finger along the seal, slowly opening it and bringing the folded piece of paper out. I held my breath. My anticipation ran rampant. I had absolutely no idea what to expect or what he would say. His eyes bounced from the piece of paper to me. I could see his hand shaking as he held the paper then he cleared his throat and began.

Dear Eden,

I don’t know what to say or how to even start this letter. I am so fucking sorry. I am beyond fucking sorry. I thought he was my best friend. I thought I could tell my best friend about the girl I had been admiring from afar. I thought it was simply a conversation between two guys in their dorm room. You were who I dreamt about, who I watched from afar. You made my ability to speak disappear, you made my confidence shatter and I never found the courage to approach you. This will be my biggest regret. You were the girl who was such a beauty but had no clue about how beautiful she was. It was a stupid drunken bet. I thought he came up with the bet to encourage me to finally make a move. Fuck, I am so sorry. I feel like this is all my fault. I feel like there should have been something I could have done to stop this.

I don’t even know if you will receive this letter.

I am so fucking sorry Eden.

I will never forgive myself for this, for as long as I am still breathing.

Thinking of you,

Ky Crawford.

He dropped his eyes, and the letter floated from his fingers and hit the desk. His voice was thick with emotion and hitched over his apology and his face was as pale as a ghost. I knew I was crying, I felt the torrent of tears flooding over my cheeks and the twist of my heart as I took in the words of his letter. The first sob escaped my body as soon as he said Dear Eden.

My shaking hands skimmed down the front of my coat, lingering over the brass buckles. The urge to comfort Ky engulfed me like a riptide. I needed to comfort him, and I needed him to comfort me. He had been sitting on this for four years, slowly killing himself with regret when there was nothing he needed to be sorry for; four long, devastating and horrendous years.

I crossed the room until I stood beside his desk. His eyes finally lifted to meet mine, and all I saw was regret and remorse staring back at me.  I stepped toward him and before I lost confidence I lifted my leg and straddled his lap.

“Eden, what are you doing?”

I lifted my arms and slid them around his neck. His hands fell to my hips and pulled me closer to his body. We locked gazes, a thousand unspoken words fired between us. I didn’t know what I wanted to say to him. I didn’t know what I could say to him, but I knew my actions would have to do. My fingertips ran through his thick hair and his face fell to the crook of my neck where his unsteady breathing hit my bare skin.

It didn’t take long until his soft lips caressed my neck, sucking, nipping, and licking my sensitive skin. He knew this area was my kryptonite. My head fell to the side, allowing him easier access. My body reacted immediately, and I shifted closer, grinding my heat into his growing erection. A moan fell from his lips, but he didn’t stop the assault on my neck. I needed to feel his skin. My fingers left the softness of his hair and fell to the crisp white shirt covering the body that I admired. I popped each button open, my fingertips sweeping across the muscles of his chest torturously slow.

“What are we doing?” He asked breathlessly.

“Please don’t stop me Ky, we need to do this.”

He didn’t say another word. His hands grasped onto the brass buttons of my coat and within seconds his gasp was heard through the office. His hungry eyes roamed over my black lingerie covered body.

“You left the house in just this?”

“Well I didn’t think your brother would stop me on my way here.”

“You are so damn beautiful.”

I felt my cheeks darken under his lustful gaze. The smallest of chuckle rose from his chest before I slammed my lips to his. This kiss was full of apology, need, desperation, and connection. My tongue grazed his bottom lip and instantly he opened and let me in. Our tongues swayed in perfect harmony together, combining as one, soothing the lies that had been said, the games that had been played.

I moaned against his lips as our hands attacked one another. I was desperate to feel connected to him; I needed to know that there was still something that would allow us to overcome this. I gripped onto his pants, undoing the button and fumbling for the zipper. My hand fisted around him tightly. I ran my hand up and down his length, feeling it hardening in my grip. I loved knowing I had the ability to do this to him. He drew in a strong hiss and his head fell to my shoulder. I kept working him, his breath trampled over my increasingly heated skin and as I increased my pace, I knew he was close.

His hand left my hip and slid down my thigh and I knew what was coming. I couldn’t help but let out a small cry. His finger ran along the lace of my panties, teasing and tormenting my throbbing clit. I wanted contact. I wanted to feel him. With one swift movement, my panties were pushed to the side, and he entered me. I moaned loudly, the echo filling the silence in the office. I stilled and adjusted. Finally our gaze met, and I could see hesitation looking back at me. Hesitation I didn’t want to see.

“I want this,” I admitted. “Please Ky.”

That was all it took. I saw the reluctance leave his eyes, and immediately it was replaced with determination. It was at the moment that I knew I was about to get all of Ky Crawford.

His mouth took mine with fierce determination. His tongue tasted every inch of my mouth. Owning me, taking me. His hands grabbed my hips and lifted me, silently begging me to take control and ride him. I didn’t know whether it was the fact that we were in his office, whether it was because he was taking me in front of a window that showed us off to the city of New York or that I hadn’t spoken to him in three days, but this, right here, was the most turned on I had ever been when it came to Ky Crawford. I rode him like my life depended on it, up and down, deeper and harder. My arms linked tightly around his body, my breasts bounced and collided with his naked chest. The friction of my nipples against the warmth of his skin caused my eyes to shut as my body tried to comprehend every emotion flooding my body.

The intensity, the raw emotion, the closure of a past I never wanted to revisit again hit me all at once. I pulled my mouth from his and buried my face in his neck and immediately I was overcome with his scent. The first tear escaped from my eyes, and I slammed them shut. I would not cry. I balanced precariously on the edge of ecstasy, lingering between reality and a dream-like state. God it felt out of this world. With a swift movement Ky pushed me back against the desk, my elbows resting on the mahogany top. The cool air hit my naked chest and a shiver ran down my spine. The shift in movement allowed him to thrust deeper, and I knew it would be any moment before I collapsed against his chest in a heap of fireworks and stars.