“I want to go with Toni,” Birdie said. “I can help.”
Toni tried imagining her sweet, special needs sister living with a group of raunchy metal musicians for several weeks. Uh yeah, no. Imagining immersing herself into the band members’ lives was challenging enough.
“Mom needs your help more than I do, Birdie,” Toni said. “Who will feed the chickens? Mom doesn’t know how.”
Birdie chewed her lip, obviously torn between the well-being of their chickens and her desire to be with the sister who’d raised her.
“Okay, Toni,” she said haltingly. “I’ll help Mommy.”
Toni gave her sister another tight hug and a kiss on the forehead. “I’ll be home before you know it.”
Birdie didn’t look quite convinced, but she ambled over to Mom and took her hand. “I’ll show you how to feed chickens, Mommy. So next time you can feed them and I can go with Toni.”
Mom patted her youngest daughter’s back and smiled, but Toni knew the woman wouldn’t go within ten yards of the coop. It had been her father’s idea to buy the little farm an hour east of Seattle, and after he’d passed away, Mom had wanted to sell it and move closer to the office. But Toni had convinced her to keep their idyllic property. For Birdie’s sake and for hers. Anything that allowed Toni to keep the memory of her father alive was worth the effort to maintain and the loss of any chance at a social life.
“Call if you need anything,” Mom said.
“I will. Love you both.”
“Love you too, Toni!” Birdie yelled in what most would consider an outside voice. But Birdie only had two volumes—loud and whisper.
Toni waited a few moments before collecting her gear and heading to Susan’s office. Toni didn’t want Birdie to see her again and be forced to go through their goodbyes twice. And maybe if she dawdled enough, Julian would come collect her for their drive to the arena, helping her keep her interaction with her overbearing editor as short as possible.
The ten-yard journey down the hall was just enough to get Toni’s heart thudding and her palms sweaty. How could her mom possibly think Toni was capable of being the boss of this place? She’d never been like her ambitious mother. Toni took after her father—laid back, creative, and painfully shy. She hoped her shyness didn’t hinder her interactions with the members of Exodus End. What would she do if she froze up and couldn’t say a word to any of them? That would make conducting interviews rather challenging.
Toni took a deep breath and tapped her knuckles quietly on Susan’s thick wooden door. Maybe Susan wouldn’t hear her knock over the heavy metal music she always blared into her ears via earbuds.
“Come in,” Susan called.
Dammit.
Toni eased the door open and peered anxiously inside. “My mom said you wanted to see me before I left.”
“I do,” Susan said.
Toni pushed her glasses up her nose with the back of her hand.
“Well, are you going to come in or are you going to stand there staring through me?” Susan snapped.
Toni entered the room, deposited her cases, and closed the door.
“Sit.” Susan waved to a chair across from her desk.
“I don’t think I have time. Julian—”
“Sit!”
Toni perched on the edge of a blue club chair and clenched her fingers into her long skirt. She wasn’t sure what it was about this woman that ratcheted her anxiety into the stratosphere. Toni didn’t handle disapproval well. She always strived to make everyone happy, and she couldn’t figure out how to make Susan happy with her—besides giving up her assignment with Exodus End and allowing Susan to take her place. But Toni refused to back down in this case. She wasn’t afraid to go after what she wanted; she just didn’t want much. But she did want to make this interactive biography a success, even if it meant telling Susan to go fuck herself. Toni rubbed her lips together. Okay, no, she doubted she’d ever be able to say something so crass to anyone’s face, but she’d think it, by God.
Susan slid a legal pad across her desk. “Here are the interview questions I came up with.”
Toni read upside down. Which musician living or dead would you most want to spend a day with? She blinked hard so she wouldn’t roll her eyes. She was pretty sure fans didn’t care which musician the members of Exodus End would want to hang out with. She sure didn’t. Toni picked up the legal pad, however, and stuffed it into her messenger bag.
“I still don’t think you’ll be able to handle this job,” Susan said.
“I disagr—”
“You’ll probably spontaneously combust at the sight of them.”
Well, they were incredibly attractive men. All four of them, but—
“And the way you dress?” Susan shook her head. “You won’t fit in with a group of rock stars. They’re not going to open up to someone like you.”
Pressure began to build behind Toni’s eyes. “Someone like—?”
“You have absolutely no experience as a reporter. I’ve interviewed hundreds of musicians over the years. How many have you interviewed?” Susan’s voice was beginning to rise, and that scary vein over her left eye bulged.
“Well—”
“Zero! That’s how many. You know you wouldn’t have gotten this assignment if your mother didn’t own the company, right? I mean you hardly ever come in to the office . . .”
That was because Toni did most of her work from home so she could take care of Birdie.
“. . . and you have no field experience. So what if you can code and do graphic design and write? You can’t talk. Journalists have to know how to talk.”
She might have talked if Susan had shut her mouth for more than half a second.
“If you can’t talk, you can’t ask questions. So what good are you?”
Susan actually paused long enough for a response. What good was she? Toni didn’t know. She wouldn’t know until she tried. But every point Susan made was valid. Toni didn’t have any experience interviewing musicians—or anyone famous, for that matter. She wouldn’t fit in with the crew on tour with the band or the fans and definitely not four famous rock stars. Toni’s chest tightened, and she fought the flood of tears that suddenly burned her eyes. What she needed right now was a pep talk, not to be berated and belittled by a jealous cow.
“Are you seriously going to cry right now?” Susan asked, tilting her head forward so that her silky burgundy hair swung over one sharp blue eye. The silver hoop that pierced the corner of one of Susan’s nostrils caught the light and Toni’s attention. Susan would fit in better with a rock band. Toni couldn’t deny it.
“No.” Not at that very minute. Toni could at least hold it together until she found a bathroom before she unleashed a torrent of tears.
“I don’t know why I’m so worried that you’ll fuck this up.” Susan laughed hollowly. “You’ll take one look at the tour bus and flee in terror.”
Toni lifted her chin, which betrayed her by quivering most annoyingly. “I won’t.”
“We’ll see. You mother already told me that if you fail, I can take back the job I was hired to do. I guess I’d better start packing. You’ll be home by midnight.”
“You only know how to do interviews. You don’t know how to do anything else this job requires,” Toni said.
“I’ll send all the information to you and you can make it pretty and flow together into a book. That’s what you’re good at.”
It was what she was good at. Design. In the past, Toni had been forced to use the information, photographs, illustrations, videos and audio clips that someone else had decided were important for making an amazing interactive book. For this project, she was in charge of collecting everything necessary to capture the men behind the rock stars. And she was determined to wow everyone with this biography. Even Susan. And maybe her mom would realize that Toni was most valuable as a creative asset to Nichols Publishing, not as the head of it. Toni had to get this book right the first time. Mom wasn’t big on second chances.